Chapter 133: A Subtle Shift
April 3rd, Crescent Moon
"Mmm… ngh…"
I woke slowly, still half-asleep.
Felt like I’d been asleep for a long time.
How long had it been since I’d made it through the night without anxiety, nightmares, or even dreams of bliss?
Still under the covers, I reached out and fumbled for my phone by the pillow.
Rubbing my eyes, I checked the screen—it was sometime between morning and noon. A lot later than I usually woke up.
“Well, no wonder.”
So much had happened yesterday.
The date with Alicia, one I’d gone into ready for it to be the last. Then at night, the method to save her that I heard from Hisui. The talk with my family after that… and on top of it all, I’d pulled an all-nighter the day before.
While I was asleep, a few messages had come in. I scrolled through them without leaving the warmth of my blanket.
One was from Hisui—she said she’d gotten Uncle Mitsuhiro’s approval. The timestamp was so ambiguous I couldn’t tell if she’d sent it at night or early morning, which told me how hard she’d worked to convince her dad.
I added a quick message of thanks and replied that I accepted her proposal.
Last night I’d fallen asleep without thinking too deeply about it, but after a full night’s rest, my thoughts had settled.
I was always going to save Alicia. And if Souta and Hisui were willing to help, then I’d gratefully accept.
I also replied to Yuna, who’d sent a message out of concern for me, letting her know I’d accepted Hisui’s plan.
Then I saw the next message and froze.
It was from Suzuka. She’d written to encourage me, saying she was worried after hearing that Alicia and I had broken up.
That, in itself, made me happy. I appreciated it.
But—
“…I wonder how Suzuka would react if she knew what I’m about to do.”
Even if the relationship was over, Souta was the one she had feelings for. What I was planning could easily be seen as a betrayal from her perspective.
“…Still.”
I felt bad for Suzuka, but I didn’t have the luxury to tiptoe around her feelings right now and choose a different path.
So for now, I just sent back a safe, polite reply thanking her for her concern.
…Once I’ve calmed down a bit more, I’ll meet with her properly and explain everything.
I consider Suzuka a friend, and I want to be honest with her.
If she ends up hating me for it… that’s just how it is.
“No message from Souta, huh.”
He’d probably been there too, when Hisui spoke with Uncle Mitsuhiro. If he hadn’t reached out, he was likely still wrestling with what we were about to do.
“…He really is such a prude.”
Just imagining Souta getting all flustered over it made me laugh a little.
“Well, I’m sure Hisui will tell him anyway…”
Still, it felt a bit off to not say anything myself, especially since I’d already decided to rely on him. So I sent a short message: Looking forward to working with you.
He read it almost instantly, then a few moments later replied with a simple, ‘Yeah.’
That wrapped up the morning messages.
I set the phone back by my pillow and stretched out with a yawn.
“Mmm—what a nice day!”
The warm spring sunlight was streaming into the room.
Just as I was about to get up and head downstairs, there was a knock at the door.
“Alice~, I’m coming in, okay~?”
Sounded like Yuna had come up to talk after seeing my message. She didn’t even wait for my reply before opening the door and stepping inside.
“Morning, Alice~”
“Morning, Yuna.”
“…So, you’ve made up your mind?”
“Yeah.”
I gave Yuna a smile.
There was no more hesitation.
“Alice…”
And yet, for some reason, Yuna hugged me—though I thought I’d been doing a good job not making her worry.
After a few seconds, she let go.
Then, without a word, she sat down in the chair at my study desk—seemed like she planned to stay in the room for a while.
At this point, we weren’t in a relationship where I’d make a fuss over that, so I didn’t mind and went ahead with getting changed.
“Papa was on the phone with Uncle Mitsuhiro just now. Sounds like we’re all going to his place this afternoon to talk things over.”
“I see.”
It helped that our families had always been close. Things moved fast.
Thinking that, I went to the closet and started picking out clothes.
Maybe I’ll go with a black knit sweater—an asymmetrical one with lace detail as an accent—and pair it with a matching black gathered skirt?
I held them up and stood in front of the mirror to see how they looked together.
“If you’re going with that top, wouldn’t that skirt over there be a better match? All black’s a bit heavy.”
Taking Yuna’s suggestion, I swapped the skirt for a white flared one and checked my reflection again.
…Yeah, this does feel better.
Yuna still has way better fashion sense than me.
“Uncle Mitsuhiro must’ve been shocked, though.”
“No kidding…”
Even just accepting my circumstances must’ve been hard enough for him. And on top of that, his daughter Hisui had declared she was going to marry me—someone who was legally listed as female—and have a child with me using his son Souta’s sperm… Honestly, I can’t believe they managed to convince him.
I peeled off my pajamas and tossed them on the bed, then began putting on the outfit I’d picked.
Once I finished dressing and looked at myself in the full-length mirror, the reflection staring back was the usual me—and that made my chest ache just a little.
And then, the thought hit me.
…I want to cut my hair.
“Hey, Yuna. After breakfast, would it be okay if I stepped out for a bit?”
“I think it’d be fine… Why?”
“I want to go to the salon and get my hair cut short.”
Right after I got this body, I’d said the same thing, but back then, both Mom and Yuna had opposed it.
“I see… I think that’d be good.”
Surprisingly, Yuna agreed without much resistance this time.
“Maybe I’ll go for a drastic cut.”
I mimed a scissor motion with my fingers and pretended to snip my hair off around the nape of my neck.
“No way! You can’t! Your current clothes won’t match anymore!”
“…That’s a thing?”
“Of course it is! So if you’re gonna cut it, at least leave it around shoulder length, okay?”
“Hmm… I guess so…”
Right now, it’s down to my waist. Even cutting it to shoulder length would change the impression a lot… right?
“If you just want a change of image, you could also try tying it up or something.”
“That might be a good idea.”
I’d barely touched my hairstyle until now.
Mostly because I didn’t want to change the image of myself in the mirror—an image that mirrored Alicia.
“I’ll bring you a scrunchie later.”
“Thanks, Yuna.”
But now, I felt ready to stop doing that too.
Because deep down, I just didn’t want anyone to touch me while I still looked so much like Alicia…
A small selfish wish of mine.
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