Chapter 149: Toward Tomorrow
Thursday, April 6 – Week 0, Day 1
Today is the last day of spring break.
Same as yesterday, I was buried in spring break homework.
“Haa… What’s even the point of trying so hard with homework when I might not be able to go back to school…”
I slumped over my desk and let out a grumble.
Even though I plan to take a leave of absence while hiding the pregnancy and childbirth, there’s no guarantee it’ll go smoothly. If the school finds out and expels me, everything I’m doing now will be meaningless.
“I get that it’s tough, but what good is giving up from the start?”
Hisui gently reproached me.
She had come again today to help me out.
“…Yeah, you’re right.”
She was absolutely right.
It’s not like I was planning to give up before even trying.
…Still, there are times when I just want to let out a bit of weakness.
“Ugh, my stomach hurts…”
I pressed my hands to my abdomen. Today was the second day of my period—the worst of it. If I could, I’d stay in bed all day.
“Come on, I’ll help too, so let’s hang in there just a little longer, okay?”
Hisui stroked my head as I lay slumped over the desk.
I let her do it and narrowed my eyes, relaxing.
“Mm… That feels nice…”
I might be getting a bit too used to leaning on Hisui like this. It’s starting to feel like I’m sinking deeper and deeper into something.
Once the pain eased a bit, I pulled myself together and got back to my homework. Thanks to Hisui’s constant support, even the parts I didn’t understand went smoothly without me getting stuck.
Some time later, there was an excited knock on the door.
“Alice, are you there!?”
When I answered, the door burst open and Yuna came in.
“Look, look! I found something amazing!”
“…What is it, Yuna?”
“I found a way to get pregnant without having sex with Aoni!”
“What did you just say!?”
Hisui shot up from her seat.
Feeling suspicious, I took the magazine Yuna brought.
“So that’s what you were out buying…”
It was a so-called conception support magazine.
Not exactly an easy book for a high school girl to buy, but she must’ve done it for my sake.
“Ugh…”
The magazine was full of photos of adorable babies, surrounded by catchy slogans all centered around the keyword “conceive.” The pressure to get pregnant practically radiated off the page.
Still, I’m the one who needs to be more desperate than anyone else right now. I’ll make sure to read it thoroughly later.
“Here, this page!”
She opened to a marked page—it was an article introducing the syringe method.
A syringe, in this case, is a needleless one, and the method involves collecting semen with it and injecting it into the vagina. Apparently, no hospital visits or diagnoses are needed to use it—you can just buy a kit online.
“If we use this, we won’t have to let that guy lay a finger on Alice!”
“Then let’s go ahead and order it right away?”
“Hmm…”
While the two of them were getting all excited, I couldn’t quite share their enthusiasm.
“I appreciate you looking into this for me, but… I don’t really want to use it.”
“Why not? Do you want to have sex with Souta, Alice?”
“Of course not.”
“Then I’d like to hear a reason I can accept.”
Hisui leaned in and questioned me with a tone that was more probing than persuasive.
“The syringe method requires fresh semen, right? That means Souta would have to do it by himself.”
The kit comes with a paper cup, like the kind used for urine samples. He’d have to collect his semen in that.
“So what? That monkey does it on his own anyway. Just let him do it.”
“He can’t do it several times a day. Male ejaculation is surprisingly delicate, you know.”
“…Is it really?”
“If I had a body that couldn’t have sex, then it’d be a different story. But that’s not the case…”
According to the article, the syringe method is useful for couples who can’t have normal intercourse—like in cases of erectile dysfunction. So if sex is possible, that’s naturally the better option.
“Also, they say that having sex causes hormones to be released that help with pregnancy and childbirth.”
It might not be scientifically proven, but for some reason, I feel like that theory’s probably true.
A woman’s body was made to work that way—or at least, that’s how it seems to me.
“Alicia’s body stopped developing because of the Miko’s blessing. So I want to get it as prepared as I can for childbirth.”
After all, what’ll be coming out of there is way bigger than Souta’s thing. It makes sense to start getting used to it, even just a little.
“…But sex just hurts for you, right, Alice?”
“If Souta feels good, that’s enough for me. The more aroused he is, the more sperm he releases—and I want to raise the chances of getting pregnant, even a little.”
Souta would probably go along with the syringe method if I asked him to.
But to boost the chances of conception, I need to take in as much semen as possible. That would mean forcing Souta to jerk off into a paper cup again and again. Just imagining his post-ejaculation “cool-down” phase after that feels… kinda sad.
I think masturbation should be something done freely.
Because it’s a selfish, purely personal act—that’s what makes it masturbation.
If I’m going to take away his freedom to do that on his own terms, then the least I can do is make sure he gets something good out of it. Otherwise, it wouldn’t be fair.
That’s how I see it.
“…Are you really okay with that, Alice?”
“Yeah.”
Still, if I’d known about this before losing my virginity, I might’ve hesitated. But that ship’s already sailed.
Thankfully, I managed to take Souta’s thing inside me. And at this point, I don’t feel that much resistance to being held by him.
I just have to close my eyes and endure it.
“…If that’s how you feel, then I guess it can’t be helped.”
“Sorry, Hisui.”
I do feel bad toward Hisui, since she’s my girlfriend. But she’s the one who came up with this whole plan involving Souta in the first place—so I hope she’ll back down here.
Of course, I still need to ask Souta how he feels.
If he prefers the syringe method, then there’s no issue.
He has someone he likes. He’s a guy, so maybe he can separate feelings from sex, but I might still be putting him through something rough with my demands.
And I’m his best friend. And I used to be a guy.
That has to make it hard for him to accept all of this.
“…Or maybe not?”
I rethink that conclusion.
The look on Souta’s face the other day when he was on top of me—his expression had been slack with pleasure, like he was in heaven…
He seemed really into it.
Souta must’ve been totally captivated by his first time.
Well… I guess I can’t blame him.
After some discussion, we decided to go ahead and order the syringe kit for now. You never know what might happen, and in the worst-case scenario—if Souta ends up not being an option—I might be able to ask Dad instead.
April 7, Friday — Week 0, Day 2
Starting today, I’m officially a second-year high schooler.
I checked the class lists posted first thing in the morning and headed to my new classroom.
I was relieved to see that I was still in the same class as Yuna. A few others, including Jun, were also with me again this year. Unfortunately, Fumika and Yamazaki-kun ended up in different classes.
Some of my old classmates were surprised that I’d cut my hair and started wearing it in a ponytail over the break, but they told me it suited me, which made me happy.
During homeroom, I gave a safe, standard self-introduction, and afterward I managed to have a few brief chats with some of my new classmates. At this pace, I’ll probably be able to fit in quickly… Though, since I plan to take a leave of absence once I get pregnant, who knows how long I’ll actually be around.
There were only the opening ceremony and homeroom today—no actual classes.
After being buried in homework for the past two days, I wanted to unwind a little, so on a whim, I headed over to the clubroom.
“…H-Hey.”
Souta was the only one there. I hadn’t contacted him at all since I told him two days ago that my period had started.
When I entered the clubroom, he tensed up awkwardly, clearly aware of me being there.
“Are… are you okay today?”
…I’m not okay.
It’s the third day of my period, and my stomach still feels heavy.
Sure, it’s a bit better than yesterday, but…
“Sorry. I’m still bleeding, so… today’s a no-go.”
Even though we’re close friends, it still feels a bit awkward talking about my new body like this.
“Um, I get that you want to do it, but… you’re not supposed to ask a girl something like that, you know? …Well, I guess since it’s me, I don’t mind.”
I get that Souta doesn’t fully understand how a woman’s body works, so I’ll let this one slide and not deduct points today.
“T-That’s not it!? That’s not what I was asking! I was genuinely worried about you—I mean, seriously!”
…Looks like I misunderstood his question.
“S-Sorry… I’m fine, really.”
That was… a pretty embarrassing thing to blurt out.
…Guess I’m the one losing points here.
We had this awkward tension right from the get-go.
Trying to reset the mood, I focused on finding what I’d come here for.
I found it right away: a newly released guidebook listing every card from the latest Wiso set. It was technically club property, though Suzuka had left it in the room for everyone to use.
I picked it up and took a seat a little away from Souta.
As I flipped through the pages, thinking of deck ideas with the new cards, I started to feel Souta sneaking glances at me.
“Hmm…? Did you want to read this too, Souta?”
Souta quickly shook his head.
“N-No, it’s not that…”
Even after that, I could feel his gaze on me from time to time. And not just casual glances—he was staring like he was burning up.
“Wh-What is it? You keep looking over here… It’s making me self-conscious.”
“S-Sorry…”
Souta turned his face away as he replied.
“What’s up with you? You seriously getting all worked up just because you haven’t gotten off in three days?”
I teased him a little, and Souta suddenly stiffened, trembling. Looks like I hit the mark.
Wait, seriously...?
Even though he’s already experienced sex, is he really this impatient now? This is worse than when he was still a virgin…
Thinking that, something suddenly occurred to me.
“You haven’t, like, jerked off since then, have you...?”
“...We made a promise.”
The promise I made with Souta the first time we had sex.
He said he wanted to finish everything inside me.
“Yeah, but you don’t have to go all the way without letting off steam when you can’t do it…”
“I can’t just do whatever I want when you’re the one holding back.”
Souta looked away, pouting in a way that was probably just him being shy.
“Souta…”
Honestly, it’s kind of typical of him to be so helpless about holding back his desires like this.
“Are you still taking those supplements too?”
“...Yeah.”
“That’s just reckless…”
What an idiot.
He just learned about sex and now that he’s being denied, he’s probably frustrated enough as it is—and on top of that, he’s taking libido boosters?
Is he some kind of masochist?
I sighed involuntarily.
“I think by tomorrow most of the bleeding will have stopped. There might still be a little, so it could get messy, but if you don’t mind, we can go for it… What do you say?”
Tomorrow will be the fourth day of my period. Ideally, we should wait until the bleeding completely stops to avoid infection risk, but given the circumstances, I’m willing to accept a little risk if Souta wants it.
Even during periods, sperm can survive for about a week after ejaculation, and if ovulation comes early, pregnancy is still possible, so it’s not completely pointless.
“...Please. Honestly, just hearing you say you’re going to finish inside me is driving me crazy.”
Though we’re sitting down, Souta’s pants were straining hard in the crotch. Maybe he noticed my gaze, because it twitched and reacted. His breathing was shallow.
“Wow, you’re seriously messed up…”
He’s so pent-up he’s about to lose it. Normally, Souta wouldn’t just flaunt his hard-on like that in the clubroom.
But well, if he’s taking strong supplements and trying to abstain, I guess this is inevitable.
“Tomorrow, I’ll keep you company as much as you want. Can you hold out just for today?”
“—As much as I want… Ugh…”
“...Don’t imagine it, idiot.”
Looks like I’m too much of a temptation for him right now.
Since I don’t have any interest in teasing Souta like this, I decided to leave early today. I’ll just check the card list on my phone.
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