Chapter 23: Um… About the Fourth Holy Grail War

Shirou, of course, knew what a kiss was. The details might vary from country to country or region to region, but most of the time, that was a ritual in which a man and a woman who loved each other confirmed their feelings. It was the act of bringing into contact two of the most sensitive membranes of the human body. In this country, it was sometimes even mocked as indecent. He knew all that. But this was the first time he had ever experienced one himself.

The instant their lips touched, it was as if lightning ripped through Shirou’s body. The vivid sensation dulled his will to resist, leaving him unable to do anything but let it happen.

The moment the strength left Shirou’s body, Saber’s mouth grew more intense, more forceful. The hand that had been around his waist slid up along his face, pulling him closer. Their lips moved along unfamiliar paths, as if driven on by urgency. The sensation was so overpowering his head spun, his mind turning to mush.

Someone once said the body and the mind are separate things. Even though his heart knew he had to stop, his body shoved his reason aside. In the silent darkness of night, the sound of their breathing echoed loud and clear. There was no room left to care that there were many people around them, or that every eye was on them.

Overcome by Saber’s ragged, feverish breath, Shirou let out a rough groan. His arms, which had been frozen, broke through the shackles of tension and his fingers tangled themselves in her hair.

“—Hey, Shirou!! What do you think you’re doing in a place like this!?”

The first one to snap out of it was Illya. She had been frozen in shock at the scene unfolding before her eyes, but finally came to her senses and wedged her small frame between them.

Only then did the light of reason return to Shirou’s eyes. For a moment, he felt like Taiga had just scolded him, and he jolted as though a current had run through his body.

Hands on her hips, Illya was clearly in “lecture mode.” Shirou frantically tried to come up with an excuse, but before he could, Saber brushed Illya aside and stepped toward him.

“…Shirou.”

Her voice was so sweet it was almost cloying, like sugar candy. For an instant, he didn’t even realize it was Saber who had spoken. Her face as she leaned against him was overflowing with affection.

“You’re going to explain this, aren’t you?”

Illya, her temple twitching, directed the question toward Caster. The gaping hole in Caster’s abdomen had already regenerated, and she gave a small nod.

“For now, let’s get out of here. I’ve burned through most of the magical energy I’d stored up, and soon enough the Holy Church’s people will be swarming this place…”

“…Then let’s head to the Emiya residence.”

It was Rin who made the suggestion. There was no time to be distracted by the idiots who had just done something outrageous in public.

This was Caster’s temple—hardly somewhere they wanted to linger. Besides, there was a chance Saber was under some kind of mind control, and also a possibility she’d planted something in Shirou during that kiss. Staying here would be foolish.

“Come on, Shir—”

Rin turned around… and saw Saber, cheeks flushed, happily entwining her arm with Shirou’s.

“…Something about this really pisses me off.”

Right when she’s seriously thinking through all this…

“Calm down, Rin,” Illya chided.

“For now, let’s just head to the Emiya residence without doing anything unnecessary. Saber is almost certainly under Caster’s mental control right now. If you provoke her and Shirou turns on us, we won’t be able to save him…”

“…Quite the change in attitude, considering you tried to kill Shirou before.”

“That was because it was the Holy Grail War. With Berserker taken from me, I’m a loser. By rights, I should step back and just watch from here on… But I think it would be the best outcome if Shirou became the victor who claims the Grail. So I’ll act to make sure he wins.”

In this case, the “Grail” she spoke of meant herself. Since she would eventually have to give herself to the victor, there was nothing strange about wanting to choose that person herself.

Still, Shirou was just one of many formidable opponents to her. So why single him out for special treatment—

“…So, is it because you met outside several times and grew attached?”

“Well, that might be part of it. But there’s a deeper, more fundamental reason.”

With a composed smile at Rin’s teasing words, Illya said:

“Right now, I’m not Shirou’s enemy—just his big sister. So I want to fuss over my little brother. I want to do everything I can to make him happy. My life’s no exception to that…”

Her voice was quiet—perhaps so Shirou wouldn’t hear. Rin, unable to grasp her true intent, hesitated, and then Illya told her:

“My mother’s name was Irisviel von Einzbern. And my father’s name was—Emiya Kiritsugu.”

Rin nearly cried out, but Illya silenced her with a finger to her lips.

“It must’ve been… what, over ten years ago now? The Einzbern family lamented their lack of combat ability. If all they were doing was research, combat skill was useless—but in the Holy Grail War, that’s the most valued quality of all. So Grandfather decided to bring in an outside magus. It caused quite a stir at the time.”

“I can imagine…”

As the shape of the story became clear, Rin felt a headache coming on.

“That outside magus was Emiya Kiritsugu. And between him and the magus the Einzberns assigned to him… you were born?”

“That’s right. The rest you already know. Kiritsugu took the relic the Einzberns prepared for him, fought in the Holy Grail War, and never returned to the castle again.”

Illya murmured sadly.

“I only learned about Shirou a short while ago. At first, I hated him—this boy who had taken Kiritsugu from me and stood by his side as his son. But… after actually meeting him and talking with him…”

Illya let out a long sigh.

“He wasn’t someone I could hold on to hatred for. In just a short time together, I could feel my resentment and anger being replaced by affection.”

She looked at Shirou with a weary expression.

“And Saber… I disliked her too, since I thought she was the same Servant Kiritsugu had summoned.”

She gave a small shrug.

“But Saber won’t let me keep hating her, either. Really, what a troublesome pair of Master and Servant.”

“Well… I’ll agree with you there,” Rin said with a wry smile. “Leave them alone and they seem liable to get themselves killed… truly a troublesome pair.”

---

Returning to the Emiya residence brought a small sense of relief. Even the unease I’d been feeling from the softness of Saber clinging to my arm seemed to have eased—if only slightly.

“See? We’re here, Saber.”

“Y-Yes…”

On the way back, Caster had explained why Saber was acting so strangely.
She also told me… why Saber had been summoned.

“You doing alright?”

Apparently, Caster had made Saber experience a long dream—one where she slowly became accustomed to having a girl’s body, so she could accept it without resistance. That was her explanation.

It must have been around then that Saber’s demeanor began to shift. The blissful smile she had been wearing faded little by little, until she was looking down at the floor. Now, she almost seemed to be trembling.

“H-Hey, Saber?”

When I called out to her, Saber turned her face away.

“M-My apologies, Shirou. I… have some personal matters to attend to. If you’ll excuse me, I’ll be going to my room first.”

“Wha—Saber!?”

After slowly letting go of Shirou’s hand, Saber bolted like a startled hare.
While Shirou stood there dumbfounded, the others exchanged knowing looks.

And then—

“Ginyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!?”

A bloodcurdling scream rang out from the detached wing of the house.

“S-Saber!?”

Shirou tried to rush after her, but Archer held him back.

“Hey! What the hell are you doing!? Saber just screamed!”

“It’s fine. Well… not fine, but fine. For now, just… grant her mercy.”

“I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about!!”

As Shirou struggled and thrashed under Archer’s grip, Rin and Illya cast icy glares at Caster.

“You… are a dyed-in-the-wool sadist.”

“You’re a demon…”

---

It felt so unbearably comfortable to be by his side. Safety and happiness—both given freely, without asking.
I breathed in Shirou’s scent, savoring his warmth.

“—Saber’s soul was originally—so now—”

That annoying noise again, spoiling my bliss.
Until now, I’d never heard anyone’s voice but his. It was grating… painfully so.

“—I showed Saber a dream. So she wouldn’t resist having a woman’s body—”

…What was that just now? That sounded like something I couldn’t just ignore.

Come to think of it… we’d always been alone, the two of us. But now, I could swear I saw familiar faces lined up around us.
And every now and then, they’d glance this way.

A sudden wave of unease struck me, and I clung to his arm even tighter.
Then—

“Saber…”

His voice—it wasn’t the gentle whisper I was used to.
It was troubled. Concerned. Tainted with worry.

In an instant, the hazy fog clouding my thoughts cleared.
…Cleared completely.

“…Huh?”

Something’s wrong. Why am I clinging to Shirou’s arm like this?
No—my memories are all still intact.

I’d been dreaming. A strange dream where Shirou and I… spent every moment together as if we were newlyweds, loving each other without end.
I don’t know what the purpose was, but apparently, Caster had been the one to show it to me.

But that’s not the real problem now.
Somehow, without realizing it, I had woken up from that dream.

"............"

Wait a second...

I think I’ve just done something I can’t ever take back.

Alright—if I stretch the definition a hundred steps, clinging to Shirou’s arm is fine. It’s dangerously close to being out of bounds, but I’ll call it safe for now.

But kissing? That’s bad. I even slipped my tongue in. It was my first kiss, and I kissed a boy—no, I enjoyed it to the fullest.

Shirou’s probably inexperienced too. I can’t imagine him making a move on Sakura-chan, and the thought of him kissing Fuji-nee is impossible...

I stole the lips of a boy younger than me, and on top of that, I pushed my tongue in... that’s outright criminal.

The realization of what I’d done drained the color from my face, and I started trembling. The most terrifying thing is—there’s zero disgust in me about the fact I kissed him.

"Uh, hey, Saber?"

Shirou’s voice brushed my ear, and my heart leapt.

This is bad... extremely bad... I can’t even look him in the face.

"S-Sorry, Shirou-san. I, ah, have some personal matters to attend to. If you’ll excuse me, I’ll head to my room first."

"Wait, Saber!?"

Shoving down the crushing urge to linger, I tore myself away from him and ran. I went all the way to the annex and slipped into an empty room.

I dove headfirst into the bed, and in the next instant, I screamed.

"GinyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!?"

I rolled across the bed, tumbled to the floor, and kept rolling.

Crapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrap.

I seriously don’t know how I’m supposed to face Shirou after this.

No, wait—Rin and Illya saw me. They saw me kissing a boy and clinging to him.

"MigyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!?"

There’s no choice. I have to die. Right now.

But then, how am I supposed to apologize to Shirou? Dying isn’t the kind of apology that works for him.

This is bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad.

If it had just been a bird kiss, maybe—maybe—I could’ve made some sort of excuse... probably.

But I went all the way with a deep one. No excuses possible. This isn’t just “some gay thing”—I’ve plunged headfirst into the far deeper sin of being a shotacon.

"Ca—Ca-ca... Caster!!!"

This is all her fault. Whatever her reason was, she made me see that dream, and now this has happened.

I’ll kill her. I’ll kill her, and then I’ll kill myself.

"UOOOOOOOOOHHH!! I’m gonna kill you, Caster!!"

I took Excalibur in hand, setting out to slay the witch.

No hesitation. No second thoughts. I ran as hard as I could toward the sound of her voice.

"Caster!! I’ll definitely kill yo――――"

"...Shirou-kun Barrier."

The moment I burst into the living room, Caster stood Shirou up and hid behind him.

At once, I started trembling. The instant I saw his face, my behavior just now felt unbearably embarrassing.

I don’t want him to think I’m shameless. That strange, unfamiliar feeling swelled inside me, and I bit my lip—then cried.

"C-Coward! Caster!!"

No good. I can’t stay here.

"Dammit!! You idiot, Caster!!"

I bolted away in a noisy clatter, looking every bit the defeated loser.

I locked myself in the room I’d come from, pulled the blanket over my head, and kept rolling around.

It wasn’t until the following morning that I finally calmed down――――.

---

"Uh, you okay, Saber?"

Shirou asked as he poured tea for me, now finally emerging from the room.

I must’ve looked worn out. I took the cup, thanked him, and drained it in one go.

And then――――

"I’m sorry, Shirou-kun."

I bowed my head, putting my whole heart into the apology.

"...Huh?"

As Shirou blinked in surprise, I mumbled quietly.

"I... I really caused you all sorts of trouble..."

"I don’t think it was trouble at all."

A manly thing to say, coming from Shirou.

"...Y-you’re good, Shirou-kun."

"Huh?"

"No, um... more importantly, th-the... the kiss, too, I... I’m sorry."

I flushed bright red as I said it, but Shirou just smiled wryly.

"I don’t mind. You were just confused because Caster made you see some weird dream, right? You’re a victim too, Saber. There’s nothing to blame you for."

"Y-yeah. Hearing you say that... I’m glad."

I should be happy to be forgiven, but for some reason, something still feels unsettled.

Either way, I’ll have to settle things with Caster later. I’m sure she put me under some kind of brainwashing.

"Anyway, I was told to explain to you what’s going on right now."

Straightening his posture as he spoke, Shirou made me hurry to sit up straight too.

"First, about what happened after Caster captured you――――"

Shirou recounted to Saber, in order, everything that had happened so far.

Saber’s face paled at the mention of the shadow’s appearance, and she was stunned to hear of the existence of another Saber.

"So... you’re saying the real King Arthur is participating in this battle?"

"Yeah, that’s right. According to what Caster told me, that’s the reason you—Sato—ended up being summoned as Saber."

"...What do you mean by that?"

Shirou began to explain what Caster had told him—the reason Hino Sato, despite being in a female body as Saber, had been summoned.

When he finished speaking, he bowed his head deeply.

"...I really am sorry."

"S-Shirou-kun!?"

Saber was taken aback, and Shirou continued.

"Sato got dragged into this fight because I forced the summoning... I’m truly sorry..."

The look on his face made Saber falter. It wasn’t something so mild that you could call it ‘anguish.’

It was a tortured expression, like someone whose heart had been set aflame. On closer inspection, his face seemed thinner somehow, and there were dark circles under his eyes.

"Shirou-kun... have you been sleeping properly?"

She didn’t care about the reason she’d been summoned. What mattered more was Shirou’s health.

"...Don’t worry about me."

"That’s not acceptable!! Don’t tell me you haven’t slept at all since I went to Caster’s place!?"

No denial came. Any embarrassment or guilt she’d felt earlier was blown away.

"This is no time for this!! You need to rest your body!!"

"...I—"

"I don’t want to hear excuses!! Have you eaten? If not, I’ll make something right now, and then you’re going to bed!!"

There was so much she wanted to say, so much she wanted to think about. But Shirou’s condition was the top priority. For him to have withered away like this, something was seriously wrong.

She opened the fridge, scanning the contents for ingredients that would make a nutritious meal. The eggs were past their expiration date and couldn’t be used.

They hadn’t gone grocery shopping either. That fact weighed heavily on her.

"S-Saber, if it’s cooking, I can—"

"Just sit down!!"

She snapped at him without giving him a chance to protest, and immediately set about cooking.

It was only simple dishes, but they should taste fine.

"Here, make sure you eat properly."

She brewed tea and set it in front of him.

Shirou, still wearing a stiff expression, picked up his chopsticks.

She regretted wasting an entire night over something as stupid as a kiss. She should have noticed sooner that something was wrong with him. How could she have missed it, when he’d been worn down like this...?

"Once you finish eating, you’re going to sleep, understand?"

"...No, I don’t have the time."

"...What did you just say?"

Sleep isn’t something you can ignore just because you’re short on time.

Anger seeped into Saber’s voice, but Shirou replied,

"I have to get stronger... so I can’t afford to rest."

"...Don’t be ridiculous. Can’t you see yourself right now!? You’re this worn out—"

"I’m not being ridiculous!!"

Shirou’s voice rose, but Saber had no intention of backing down.

"You're being ridiculous!! Forcing yourself in that condition is completely meaningless!!"

"...But, I can't stand it anymore!!"

Shirou shouted as if forcing the words out of his chest.

"I hate it... I hate that because I'm weak, Saber ends up getting hurt or taken far away!!"

"Sh–Shirou..."

Saber faltered. It was because tears were spilling from Shirou's eyes...

"――――I don't want to stay weak."

She couldn't find anything to say back to that.

"...So, you'll push your selfishness through and trouble Saber?"

Suddenly, Archer appeared in the room and spoke.

"...What did you just say?"

"Saber is right. In your current condition, spending time on training is nothing but a waste. Sleep once, recover your strength, and only then continue."

"But――――"

"I know telling you not to rush is unreasonable... but even so, don't rush. If you want to protect Saber, never lose your composure. If you let yourself be swayed by a fleeting emotion and make the wrong choice, all you'll be left with later is regret..."

"Archer...?"

Paying no mind to Shirou and Saber's confusion, Archer quietly vanished.

"…Well, Archer did say so, too."

"...Alright."

---

By evening, when Shirou woke up, everyone was already gathered in the living room.

"You're up, Shirou."

"Yeah... sorry, even at a time like this――――"

"No one’s going to complain. You're the type who pushes yourself too far, so the fact you actually took a rest is something to be grateful for."

Rin gave a wry smile, and Shirou thanked her before sitting down next to Saber.

"Now that you’re awake, Shirou, I’ll get straight to it—an order to report has come from the Kotomine Church."

Shirou blinked in surprise.

"An order to report...?"

"Yeah. The commotion this time was too big, so the Supervisor has decided to step in. Well, it’s not like we’re strangers to the Supervisor, and in this case the fault lies with the Makiri side. I don’t think it’ll turn out too badly for us."

"The Supervisor, huh..."

At Rin’s words, Saber’s expression clouded.

"What’s wrong?"

"No... it’s nothing. More importantly, are we all going?"

To Saber’s question, Rin answered without hesitation, "Of course."

"I’d rather not split our forces unnecessarily, so we’ll all head to the church together."

After that, they each got ready and began walking toward the church.

"Speaking of which..."

As they walked, Shirou muttered,

"What about Caster’s Master? Is it okay for you not to be with them?"

The one who answered was Caster herself.

"I’ve completely concealed my Master’s identity, so it’s actually safer not to be with them. Of course, I’ve made preparations in case of an emergency, so it’s fine."

"I see..."

Rin and Illya both clicked their tongues quietly.
They’d briefly entertained the hope that they might get information on Caster’s Master, but that hope was gone in an instant.

Caster, noticing their reaction, smiled.

"If you want to know about my Master, you can ask Archer. I’ve already told him."

"Huh?"

Rin and Illya turned to look at Archer at the same time.

"...Caster."

"I don’t mind if you tell them. I have no intention of betraying you. In fact, you can take it as proof that I won’t."

"――――I see. Understood. I’ll talk about Caster’s Master after we return. Sorry, I kept quiet because I didn’t want to risk angering her unnecessarily."

"...If you’ll tell us later, that’s fine."

Archer gave a wry smile at Rin, whose gaze carried a trace of distrust.

"Sorry about that, Master."
"...Hmph."

---

After walking for a while, the Kotomine Church finally came into view.
It had been years since Shirou last came here.

"Alright, shall we go?"

At Rin’s cue, everyone nodded. Only Saber kept her guard fully raised, scanning the surroundings as they walked.
Wondering at her behavior, Shirou stepped through the church entrance.

Suddenly, the sound of a piano reached his ears.

"…Oh, you’ve arrived, Rin."

The piano stopped, replaced by a girl’s voice.
Saber’s eyes widened at the sight of her.

White hair. Golden eyes. Saber knew this girl. But there was no way she should be here.
By rights, she was someone unrelated to the Holy Grail War—
An existence meant to fill a hole left in the repeating four-day dream of Angra Mainyu.

She was the “daughter” of the man who was supposed to be here, assigned the role of Overseer in place of the one who, after the Holy Grail War, could never have survived under any circumstances.

"――――It’s been a while, Caren. I’ve come in response to your summons."
"My thanks. I’ve received some rather harsh reprimands from above due to the recent commotion—… No, I’ll explain once everyone is here."

She glanced toward the door.

From beyond the once again opened entrance—

"Zouken!?"

Matou Zouken strode alone into the church. Everyone’s alertness instantly shot to maximum.

"――――Easy now, there’s no need to posture. I am here tonight solely because I was summoned by the Church."

The old man chuckled darkly, while Archer’s killing intent flared as he stepped forward.

"Stand down, Archer. If you act here, we will be the ones penalized by the Church."

Rin’s voice restrained Archer, who looked ready to pounce at any moment.

"…Understood."

Even as he said it, Archer kept his eyes locked on Zouken, ready to strike the instant he made the slightest suspicious move.

"It seems we’re all here."

A new figure appeared—Bazett Fraga McRemitz, accompanied by Lancer, emerging from the depths of the church.

"…And what exactly does it mean when one of the participants strolls out from the back of the church?"

Rin asked sharply.

"There’s nothing improper about it. I simply arrived earlier and was waiting in the back for the others to gather."

Bazett replied with feigned innocence, prompting Rin to click her tongue.

"In any case――――"

Caren clapped her hands, drawing everyone’s attention.

"From here on, we will be implementing a full-scale concealment operation for the entire city of Fuyuki. Therefore, all factions are ordered to observe a ceasefire for the whole of tomorrow."

Her words seemed to be exactly what everyone expected—neither Bazett, nor Zouken, nor even Rin’s group voiced any objection.

"Failure to comply will result in penalties: the confiscation of Command Seals and forfeiture of part of the Master’s personal assets. I trust you will all make the wise choice."

With a simple nod of acceptance, Zouken turned and strolled out through the doors. Bazett followed. Rin’s group, their business here apparently finished, moved to leave as well—
All except for Saber, who remained rooted in place, staring at Caren with a stunned expression.

"What’s wrong, Saber?"

Shirou asked, but Saber didn’t answer. Instead, she addressed Caren, the Overseer.

"…Caren Ortensia?"
"Yes, that is my name. Do you need something, Saber’s Servant?"
"…Uh, well—"

Hesitating, Saber finally blurted it out.

"W-Where is Kotomine Kirei!?"

Caren’s eyes widened at the wholly unexpected question, and she glanced back at Rin.
Rin, too, wore a puzzled expression and tilted her head.

"…Why bring up his name?"
"T-That’s… um…"

Saber faltered.

"That’s right—when you used your first Command Seal, Saber, you read King Arthur’s memories, didn’t you?"

Rin offered, giving her an out.

"I see… so you’d know about Kirei as well. But then, why ask where he is?"

She asked with genuine bewilderment.

"Kirei’s been dead for ten years now. During the… ――――Fourth Holy Grail War."