Chapter 28: The End of Despair, Part three

The three of us, finally losing patience, decided to withdraw from the forest while staying on guard.

We assumed it was a strategy to catch us off guard, so we acted cautiously. But in the end, even after we left the forest and returned to the Emiya residence, Illya never attacked.

Though puzzled, we made it home without incident――.

Looking back now, I can’t help but give a wry smile.
Perhaps our feelings had already started to drift apart back then.

We had successfully escaped from the Einzbern Forest and regained a brief moment of peace, but the situation still left no room for carelessness. The three of us began to consider our next move.

『Fortunately, we managed to get through without using any Command Spells. With Saber’s high-ranked Magic Resistance, defeating Caster shouldn’t be too hard. The real problem is Lancer and Assassin…』

Of the two, one could probably be defeated with the use of a Command Spell. But one enemy would still remain.

『How about… we just wait and see for a while?』

When Sato suggested that, Tohsaka made a bitter face.

『If Saber were truly the strongest and most supreme Servant, that wouldn’t be a bad plan…』

『Is there some problem?』

『Saber is probably the second weakest after Caster. Even so, she can become the strongest just once with a Command Spell. The remaining Servants are all classes skilled in espionage or legendary heroes themselves, so I doubt anyone would want to leave Saber as the last one standing.』

『Why not?』

When I tilted my head, Tohsaka gave me an exasperated, half-lidded glare.

『Because Saber can become the strongest once, right? If she’s the last one left, she can go all out in that state without hesitation.』

『Ah…』

『That’s why every faction will try to make her use her final Command Spell before the end.』

『So… what do we do?』

『Simple. We take the offensive. Caster and Assassin are the type to hole up inside, prepare an assured winning strategy, and wait for the perfect moment to strike. Sitting around and waiting is the worst plan.』

What she said made perfect sense. But there was one problem.

『Taking the fight to them is fine and all, but… can we actually win? We can’t use a Command Spell, right?』

Sato muttered with a lack of confidence.

『――…Exactly. That’s the biggest problem.』

『That’s a fatal flaw…』

Attacking when we couldn’t win would just be suicide.

『But if we wait for them, we’ll only end up in an even tighter spot…』

『In the end… either way, we’ll have to walk the line between life and death. Attacking is just the lesser evil.』

『Exactly.』

After our discussion, we decided to head for Ryuudou Temple, Caster’s stronghold――.

Night fell, and the three of us made our way to Mount Enzou. The road at night was eerily silent.

『There’s… no sign of people anywhere.』

『Well, it is the Holy Grail War. Even if they don’t know anything about it, everyone must sense the unease hanging over the city and shut themselves indoors.』

When we finally reached Mount Enzou, the three of us were struck speechless.

The stone steps leading to Ryuudou Temple had collapsed. Wondering what had happened, we climbed carefully toward the main gate.

The moment we arrived at the temple grounds, an overpowering stench of death hit us.

『I–Is that――!』

In the center lay the corpse of a woman. She had red hair.

『…Looks like she was a magus. She’s already dead. She might have been Lancer’s Master…』

『Lancer’s Master…?』

Sato’s eyes widened. Tohsaka, taking his reaction as shock at the death of Lancer’s mysterious Master, nodded.

『Most likely, she attacked this place together with Lancer… but it seems they were repelled.』

Whether we should take that as good luck was unclear.

The three of us walked uneasily through the temple grounds and stepped into the main hall. Inside, the stench of death was even thicker.

The temple residents were unharmed—but all lay in an unending sleep.

Without so much as turning over, nearly fifty monks were all utterly emaciated.

『We’ll contact the Church later. It’s alright… they can be saved.』

Tohsaka spoke gently. At some point, her hands had clenched into fists and her expression had grown severe.

We pressed further in—and there…

『Kuzuki-sensei…?』

Red stretched out in every direction.

Blood poured from the chest of a man lying face-down, staining the floor.

『…Looks like he’s been dead for quite a while.』

『W–Why is Kuzuki-sensei…?』

We could see the cause, but not the reason.

『…Most likely, he was Caster’s Master.』

Sato spoke.

『Kuzuki-sensei!?』

I blurted in shock, while Tohsaka nodded with an “I see.”

『But… why is he dead?』

『…Could it be that Caster and Lancer took each other out?』

No matter how much we thought about it, the answer eluded us.

After contacting the Church, we decided to return to the Emiya residence for now.

And――several days passed without anything happening.

Those days were truly peaceful. Looking back, I almost wish we had enjoyed them more.

For the first few days, we stayed on constant alert. But the enemy never came.

Naturally—because by then, every single enemy had already been eliminated. All but one――.

『Could it be… the fighting’s already over?』

After so much calm, Tohsaka spoke with a puzzled expression.

『Over? What do you mean?』

『Well… if we’ve been waiting this long without even a single attack… Look: Archer and Berserker killed each other, Lancer and Caster likely did too, Rider was already defeated by Saber. That only leaves Assassin—and it’s possible Assassin was already taken out by another faction long ago… right?』

It would be an absurdly sudden victory.

Sato and I stared blankly at her.

『Anyway, tomorrow I’ll go to the Church. If we really have won, they should know. The Overseer there isn’t exactly diligent, so we’ll have to go confirm ourselves――』

『W–Wait! The Church… you mean you’re going to meet Kotomine Kirei? That’s――』

『…Huh? Why bring up Kirei’s name?』

『Uh, well, you said Overseer, so…』

Tohsaka gave Sato a baffled look.

『What are you talking about…? The Overseer is a woman named Caren Ortensia. As for Kirei… he died ten years ago.』

Sato’s face froze in shock――.

That night, worried about Sato’s strange behavior, I went to the room we had given him.

『Hey… what’s going on with you?』

『N–Nothing…』

He was clearly hiding something. And that bothered me.

We had already spent weeks together—risked our lives side by side, even shared our bodies.

What was there to hide now? When I voiced my displeasure, Sato spoke in a guilty murmur.

『Sorry… Just give me a little more time…』

In the end, he never told me his secret. Not until the very end.

As we stayed together like that, I suddenly recalled the night I held Sato in the moonlit ruins.

Just like back then, the room was bathed in moonlight.

『Hey, Sato…』

『What is it?』

『Um… is your mana… alright?』

『…Pfft.』

Sato burst out laughing—and began taking off his clothes.

『No excuses necessary.』

『…Yeah.』

And so, that night too passed without incident――.

I had thought our feelings were the same.

I believed that sharing our bodies would confirm that bond.

The next day, Tohsaka had to go to the church, so while she was away, the two of us went into town. Now that the fighting was over, there was nothing to worry about. I dragged Sato all over the city, visiting all kinds of places.

Sato kept smiling the whole time. I took it as a sign she was enjoying herself, and that made me happy. We didn’t have to fight anymore. From now on, the two of us could just get along and enjoy life.

The sky turned crimson, and we walked and played until our bodies were exhausted.

And then—
The time of the Holy Grail War came again.

“…Huh?”

On the way home, chatting and laughing, he appeared before us.

“Shinji…?”

The sudden reappearance of Shinji, who had vanished after the fight with Rider, left us both stunned.

“…Had your fill of fun?”

Shinji’s tone was dark and brooding.

“Huh?”

Ignoring my confusion, Shinji continued.

“…I let you have some time because of a friend’s request, but that ends tomorrow.”

On the bridge bathed in crimson light, Shinji delivered his message.

“They say they can’t wait any longer… Emiya, break your contract with Saber right now and go to the church.”

“What… What the hell are you talking about!? The Holy Grail War is supposed to be over! We won! That means… we don’t have to fight anymore… Me and Sa—… Saber will always be—”

“I’ll show you reality.”

With a snap of Shinji’s fingers, we both gasped.

“This is reality. The cruel truth that you will never win.”

The voice came from behind Shinji.

There stood Sato—or rather, Saber.
Only now, her armor and clothing were dyed pitch-black.

“You’re…”

“You should know me well, my mirror image. Now choose—will you withdraw from the fight this instant… or—”

“D-Don’t mess with me!! Wh… What the hell are you!?”

“You know, don’t you? King Arthur, Emiya. The real King Arthur.”

Shinji spoke.

“I can hold her back only until tomorrow. Decide before then. I… don’t want to kill you. Don’t misunderstand. That thing isn’t human—it’s nothing but a ghost. Don’t throw your life away for something like that.”

“—Wait, Shinji.”

“…Huh?”

It was the black Saber who stopped Shinji as he was about to leave.

“I like you. That’s why I’ve given you some leeway. But I’m interested in this mirror image of mine. If she were to kill herself before tomorrow, it would be such a waste. Let me play a little.”

“…Hey.”

“Don’t worry. I don’t care about that brat. And I’ll stop once I’ve had my fun.”

The black Saber drew her sword, and Shinji gave a derisive snort.

“Do as you like. But don’t kill Emiya. He… made Sakura just a little more human.”

“What’s that supposed to mean, Shinji!?”

“You don’t need to know.”

With that, Shinji walked away. And then the battle began abruptly—
No, calling it a “battle” would be far too generous. It was one-sided slaughter.

Sato couldn’t withstand even a single blow before being knocked down, and the black Saber would simply wait for her to stand again. This repeated ten times before the black Saber stepped on Sato’s head and spoke.

“Pathetic. For my so-called mirror image, what a disgrace…”

With a kick, the black Saber sent Sato tumbling into the river flowing beneath the bridge.

“Y-You bastard!!”

I lunged forward, but the black Saber easily dodged my punch. Then, someone kicked me in the stomach, sending me into the river after Sato.

As I fell, the last thing I saw was—six shadows standing beside Shinji.

“No… way…”

It was a scene far too hopeless to believe.

Six Servants who should have been eliminated were now standing there, as if following Shinji’s command.

Their bodies, too, were dyed pitch-black.

Later, drenched to the bone, I returned to the Emiya residence to find Tohsaka waiting. She had just come back from the church with information.

The reason the church—an institution that should not take sides—had given her that information was simple. An anomaly had occurred, one that broke the framework of the Holy Grail War itself.

The mistake the Einzberns made during the Third Holy Grail War.
The incident that happened at the end of the Fourth.
And now, in this Fifth Holy Grail War, the transgressions and atrocities committed by Makiri.

Thinking desperately about how to use the little time Shinji had left, I finally—

“…Rin. There’s something I want to confirm.”

“What is it?”

Unable to come up with any countermeasure against the black Saber, I was sinking deeper into frustration when Sato suddenly spoke.

“Couldn’t we use a Command Spell… to make me completely into King Arthur?”

“…What do you mean? A Command Spell only has a temporary effect—it doesn’t last forever, you know?”

Nodding at Tohsaka’s words, Sato went on as if she’d just had a brilliant idea.

“Look—use a Command Spell to overwrite my mind with King Arthur’s. That way, it wouldn’t be temporary. My combat strength would be permanently enhanced.”

Tohsaka was the only one who truly understood what that meant. She opened her mouth with a grim expression—then lowered her gaze and spoke in a flat, emotionless tone.

“…Do you realize what would happen to you if we did that?”

“Of course I do. But we don’t have any other choice, do we?”

“W–What are you talking about?”

Sensing the tension between them, I pressed Tohsaka for answers. She finally said it.

“…I think Saber’s suggestion is technically possible. If we used a Command Spell, we could duplicate King Arthur’s mind from her spirit core and overwrite Saber’s mind with it. But—”

She continued.

“If we did that, Saber’s consciousness would be completely smothered by King Arthur’s.”

“W–What do you mean…?”

“Don’t you get it? If her mind is overwritten, her will won’t remain. The person she is now will die.”

“…What?”

I nearly shouted at how absurd it sounded. Sato dying… That was something I could never allow. If that happened, everything would be meaningless.

“That plan’s rejected. We’ll find another way.”

No matter what alternatives I proposed, Tohsaka and Sato dismantled them one after another. That kind of strategy, they said, would only lead to total annihilation.

Sato spoke.

“If King Arthur were to take hold of the sheath inside you, Shirou, there wouldn’t be an enemy who could stand against us. As the strongest and most supreme Heroic Spirit, we could settle everything.”

As she pressed me with those words, I kept shaking my head.

“There has to be another way.”

“There isn’t. The gap in power is far too wide. Shirou, you have to make up your mind.”

That made my blood boil.

“What the hell do you mean, ‘make up my mind’!? If it means letting you be the only one to sacrifice yourself, I’d rather—!”

“Don’t go doing anything reckless.”

Even as I raged, Sato remained calm, wearing that gentle smile of hers. And then—

“You want to be a hero of justice, don’t you?”

She said something so cruel.

“We can’t let the Makiri win. Remember what Rin said? The Makiri accept human-eating, and they’ve already caused countless victims. Do you have any idea what would happen if people like that got the Grail?”

“B–But—”

I knew she was right. The Makiri had to be stopped no matter what. I hadn’t realized it before since I wasn’t going to school, but apparently several classmates had gone missing. I didn’t even have to guess the cause.

But still—

“A–Aren’t you scared!? You’ll die!”

“…I’m not scared.”

Still smiling softly, Sato said:

“Because I’ll get to protect you. Why would I be afraid of that? Besides… I’ve already died once. I’ll be fine.”

At some point, Tohsaka had slipped away. But I didn’t care. All I wanted was to change Sato’s mind, so I kept talking.

“There has to be another way! You’re just giving up! Think harder!”

“…There isn’t. Both you and I are far too weak. If only we had a bit more power…”

“But… this is—!”

“…Don’t cry, Shirou.”

At some point, tears had begun streaming down my face.

“Shirou… it’s only been about two weeks since we met, you know? So it’s fine.”

“How the hell is it fine!?”

“You’ll get through this. You’ll be able to turn these two weeks of the Holy Grail War into just a memory, and keep moving forward. You’re strong enough.”

“Wh–What are you talking about!?”

Fed up with her selfish words, I grabbed her.

“Don’t you dare disappear! You’re going to stay with me—always!”

I knew I was being selfish, but I couldn’t stop myself from saying it. Before I realized it, I had taken her lips.

“…You leave me no choice.”

Sato murmured as if in resignation. I was sure she felt the same way I did. If she didn’t, she would have pushed me away. I undressed her and held her close. Again and again, crying each time.

“…Are you satisfied now?”

“…Huh?”

By the time I realized it, dawn was already approaching.

I was thrown off by Sato’s words, but she continued speaking.

"I’m about to say something cruel to you. So… I’ll apologize in advance."

"W–What are you talking about…?"

"The one you loved was this body. Not me."

Those words… were cruel beyond belief.

"T-That’s not true, I—"

"If I didn’t look the way I do, you’d never have wanted to hold me."

"No!! I love you, Sato—"

"The woman you loved was a fake. You were deceived by this appearance."

Stop it. I shouted at her to stop—but Sato didn’t.

"I’m a fake, Shirou. The Saber class, the name ‘King Arthur,’ even being a woman—every bit of it is a lie. I’m just Hino Sato, an ordinary university student with nothing special to offer. That’s the real me."

"S–Stop it…"

"I’m a fake. And your love—"

A fake. That’s what she called it. And it felt like my mind was coming apart.

"No, it’s not," I shouted again and again. But Sato only kept smiling gently.

"I love Sato!! And you—don’t you feel the same way!? Otherwise… why would we have shared—"

"…Yeah. I love you."

Those words… sent a shiver down my spine.

No. What Sato felt for me and what I felt for her were fundamentally different.

It wasn’t the love a man feels for a woman.
What she felt… was the kind of love a parent feels for a child.

Yes—just like the affection Fujinee always showed me.

"…Then why… didn’t you reject me when I reached out to you?"

"…I didn’t want to make you feel insecure."

Sato went on.

"Everything about me may be fake, but if there’s something I can still do, I’ll do it. That’s all there is to it. If it’s what you want, Shirou, then I—"

"Stop it!!"

Just going along with it because I asked… that’s no different from a prostitute.

That was never what I wanted from Sato.

"…Sorry. I’ve been a little messed up lately. I can’t tell what’s right and what’s wrong anymore."

"S-Sato…?"

Her face twisted in anguish.

"But when I do something for you, Shirou… my head feels clear. I can focus better than on anything else. So—… I’m sorry."

It felt like the ground had crumbled away beneath me.

I felt betrayed by everything. I was just… utterly miserable. Tears spilled from my eyes.

Sato gently stroked my head, murmuring, "I’m sorry…" over and over.

And then, dawn broke. My heart was in chaos. I felt like I’d been dealt a cruel betrayal.

So I gave up. Crying, shaking, I raised my Command Spell.

Sato still wore that same calm smile.

"It’s alright, Shirou. You’ll be fine. I know you won’t let something like this break you."

She spoke quickly, as if in a rush.

"You’ll get through this… and you’ll become a fine human being."

And then, I used the Command Spell.

The change was instant. By the time I realized what I’d done, it was far too late.

Her usually drooping eyes sharpened, and the gentle smile vanished.

"…Well then, Master. Let’s extract Avalon immediately."

That meant Sato was dead.

I had killed Sato. I only realized it after Saber had pulled Avalon out of me.

Saber was strong. The Makiri faction had seven Servants under their command and even threw the Grail’s mud into the fray, but one by one, they all fell before King Arthur with Avalon in hand.

The end came shockingly fast. So fast it was almost laughable—and in that absurd swiftness, I just felt drained.

"Well then, Master. Farewell."

As if her business was done, Saber destroyed the Holy Grail and vanished.

All I was left with… was the fact that I had killed Sato.

---

By then, the Holy Grail War he had endured was over.

Having killed the one he loved, Shirou cast everything aside and set out on a journey. With help from Rin, who had gone to England around the same time, he honed his magecraft while walking the battlefields, fighting ceaselessly to fulfill the ideal once entrusted to him by his adoptive father.

His admiration had become a curse.

"Become a fine human being."

Those were the words Sato had left him, words that would never allow him to stop.

Since he had killed her, he had to become a fine human being. There could be no half measures.

He killed to prevent tragedies. He killed those who incited wars, eliminated the sources of plagues, and slew those who created suffering.

Killed, and killed, and kept on killing. His skills in sniping and poisons deepened.

To be a hero of justice. To be a fine human being. For that, he became a first-rate murderer.

As a monster without a human heart, he came to be shunned by all, and he hid himself away in a small cabin deep in the mountains. Except when carrying out justice, he stayed there, sword in hand. Though assassination was his main method, he continued to train in swordsmanship—an art he shouldn’t have needed.

Burned into the backs of his eyelids was Saber’s way of fighting. If he’d had power like that, he could have saved Sato without killing her. So, knowing it was meaningless, he kept swinging the blade, tracing her techniques again and again. He also kept thinking about how to kill the Black Saber—the one who had set in motion the events that led to Sato’s death.

Days passed in a cycle of wandering battlefields, indulging in meaningless training, and comforting himself with delusions.

There was nothing but suffering. Yet he could not stop.

"Become a fine human being."

The curse Sato had left him would never allow him to stop.

Before he realized it, he was there—betrayed by a friend who had once shared his ideals, thrown into a cell.

As he walked toward the gallows, he felt… relief. He could only thank his friend.

At last, he could escape the pain. With the noose around his neck, he awaited the end.

And in his final moment, he murmured:

"Ah… I’m not a hero of justice at all…"

But what awaited him after death was not the void of finality—
—it was a new hell.

He had already made a contract with the world as a Counter Guardian. As a janitor of human history, he fought endlessly to prevent its ruin at the very brink.

He was shown nothing but the ugliest sides of humanity, over and over.

His heart was worn to dust, and he knew nothing but pain.

---

And then, she summoned him to his fate. Once more, in a world that should have ended, he took the battlefield with the sword techniques he had spent half a life pointlessly honing.

That was the life of the Heroic Spirit, Emiya Shirou—not the man Saber once knew, but one soaked entirely in regret, lost in self-absorption and delusion.

All the hatred and rage he showed were directed at himself. Even his intent to kill Makiri’s Saber was rooted in his own regret.

"…I…"

Archer roared:

"I’ll kill you—and this time, for sure—!"

The boy’s body had grown into that of a young man, yet, through strange encounters and a twisted fate, his heart remained frozen in that distant time.

Archer’s Kanshou came swinging down.

And in that instant—

"…Thinking about another woman? How relaxed of you."

Archer’s arm, Kanshou and all, was ripped apart.

His certainty of victory had sparked a moment of joy, slowing him by just an instant—and Artoria did not waste that opening.

Even with one arm, she unleashed a strike with Mana Burst that rendered Archer completely incapable of fighting in a single blow.

"…I see."

Artoria looked at Saber, then turned her gaze to Shirou.

"So that’s how it is."

With a bored shrug, Artoria spoke.

"For you to have acquired such skill with the sword, it must have taken the better part of your life."

Her eyes turned cold, as if disappointed.

"All of your effort was for nothing. Truly, what a meaningless life you’ve led—"

Archer’s tears spilled in frustration. Saber and Shirou moved to intervene, while Artoria readied herself to finish him.

The one who stopped them all was a single man.

"…Huh?"

Stepping into Artoria’s guard as she raised Excalibur was—

"S-Sensei?"

Shirou froze in shock. His bespectacled ethics teacher had driven his fingers into the neck of the strongest Heroic Spirit and hurled her far away.

The entire group was stunned. Even Shinji and Rider, who had been watching from the sidelines, cried out in disbelief.

Shirou’s schoolteacher, Kuzuki Souichirou, stood there with unshakable presence.

Keeping his usual stern demeanor, he said:

"…Are you unharmed, Emiya? A student wandering around a place like this at such an hour—unacceptable."