Chapter 35: ――――The Alliance Reforged

The first time I ever spoke to Emiya was during our middle school cultural festival.
He was a born yes-man, the kind of guy who said “sure” to anything anyone asked of him. That time too, the others had shoved the job of making a signboard onto him, and he was in the classroom at dusk, quietly working on it alone.

At first, I thought Emiya didn’t have anything you could call a will of his own. That he just lived going along with whatever people told him to do. And for some reason, that really got under my skin. Somehow, he overlapped with the image of my little sister, and that annoyed me even more.

Well, that turned out to be completely my misunderstanding—

『Hey… why do you just take on other people’s work like it’s nothing?』

『Hm? Well, if I take it, that means other people have it easier, right?』

『…What?』

When I tried asking for his reason, that’s what he said.
I thought he was lying. That he was just saying it so he wouldn’t seem like he was looking down on himself.
But I was wrong.

He was an honest-to-god idiot.

『――――Even if other people have it easier, what good does that do? Are you okay with that?』

『Yeah. I don’t mind.』

The way he said it, firm and without hesitation, only made me more irritated.
It was just too stupid. Spending your own time and effort for someone else—what was wrong with him?

At the very least, if he were getting some kind of reward for it, that would be different.
But the ones dumping work on him would never show him any appreciation. And he knew that.
He knew, and still—

『You’re an idiot.』

『H-hey, that’s harsh… You don’t have to hang around me, you know?』

『It’s my choice where I hang out.』

Sometimes, I just couldn’t help myself and would snap at him.

Idiot.
You’re wrong.
Get mad.
Call them out.

But whenever I lashed out, he would just smile and let it roll off him. And that irritated me all the more.

And yet—when I saw the finished signboard he’d made, I couldn’t help but be impressed.

『…You’re an idiot, but you do good work.』

The signboard was genuinely well-made. If he’d only done it reluctantly because it was forced on him, there’s no way it would’ve turned out that good.

『I am most humbly honored by your praise, Matō-dono.』

『…Hmph. I’m not taking back what I said about you being an idiot, though.』

『What the hell’s that supposed to mean?』

It was already completely dark outside.
And yet, we were laughing together.

At that moment, we became friends. The kind of friends who were rare, precious—friends you could trust no matter what.

It was some time later that I learned about Sakura.

“…It felt like all my values had been shattered. My sister had become a monster, I couldn’t become a magus, and people… people are ugly to the core. Sounds juvenile, but at that time, I really couldn’t believe in anything anymore.”

Shinji was sitting on a bench at a nearby park, telling Rider the story of how he’d first met Shirō. She stood quietly beside him as he spoke.

“But—he never changed. He’s an idiot, but he’s got a spine. No matter what, he tries to be there for other people. Even if it means he ends up losing out himself, he doesn’t care. That’s why… I could trust him.”

Shinji spoke with a genuine smile. Rider had never seen him smile like that before. Normally, his smiles always carried a trace of something broken, twisted.

“No matter what else changes, he doesn’t. Even getting dragged into a fight like this—he still hasn’t changed. Meanwhile, I’ve changed so much…”

“Shinji…”

Rider looked at her master with concern as he gazed sadly at the ground.

“…Shinji. You can still walk away from this at any time. If you wish, we can go right now and beg for mercy from Emiya Shirō. I’m sure he would accept.”

“Yeah… he probably would. But even if I make it out… what about Sakura? There’s nothing that can save her now. Even if you erased her memories and made her body clean again—it wouldn’t mean the Sakura she is now would be saved.”

“But—”

“I’d already decided, long ago. From the moment I chose to be her dessert, I swore I’d stand by that stupid little sister of mine until the very end.”

Shinji stood up and closed his eyes. When he opened them again, the smile was gone.

In its place, a dark light shone in his eyes as he looked at Rider.

“――――Come on, Rider. Let’s go ring the opening bell for the final Holy Grail War.”

With a large Boston bag slung over his shoulder, Shinji began to walk.
This time, aiming to cross the final line—

Destination: the Fujimura residence.

“Hellooo—oh! Matō-kun! What brings you here?”

Answering the chime was Shinji’s homeroom teacher, Fujimura Taiga.

To Emiya Shirō, she was a special person—someone he would prioritize over anyone else.
Because she was his one and only family.

She was his mother, his sister.
If he laid a hand on her now, there would be no turning back.

“Um… what’s going on?”

Taiga looked at him with concern.

“…I’m going to have to take you hostage.”

“Eh?”

“Rider—put her to sleep. And listen—don’t you dare hurt her.”

“Understood.”

Rider cast her suggestion, and Taiga surrendered consciousness without a fight.

She gently lifted Taiga’s body into her arms. As the two of them left the area, men who looked like members of a yakuza group came spilling out from inside.

They were from the Fujimura Group.

“…Tch, I told you I’ll give her back later.”

I stayed hidden in the shadows, letting Rider set up a bounded field.

“You know what you have to do, right?”
“——Yes, but…”
“Assassin can’t be trusted. Well, it’s not like he’s going to betray us… but that guy’s got something festering in his heart.”

It wasn’t that he doubted Assassin’s loyalty. However, Assassin had originally been Zouken’s Servant. Servants are summoned with personalities that resemble those of their summoners.

On top of that, the fact that he was currently following Shinji and the others—the very people who killed his master, Zouken—without protest was already abnormal. There was no doubt he was hiding something.

“That’s why I’m leaving everything to you. Got it? Whether I live or die, you see the plan through. I’ve already told Sakura to follow your orders. Understood?”
“…Understood, Shinji.”

“Countin’ on you,” Shinji said lightly before stepping out of the bounded field. His destination——the Emiya residence.

---

Archer’s memories were horrifyingly vivid and intense, shattering the mental walls I’d built with ease. My awareness that this was merely a replay of someone else’s memories crumbled away, and the distance between us dropped to zero.

His rage, sorrow, and agony poured into me, swallowing me whole until we became one.

I’d thought I understood. I’d thought I knew how much he had mourned when he lost Saber. But the truth was, I hadn’t understood at all.

My body burned with searing hatred, my breath catching in my throat.

“I am the bone of my sword.”

I had lost something I could never afford to lose.

From that moment on, I had stepped off the path—and kept walking, never returning. My ideals became a hollow shell, and I clung only to saving as many as I could.

“Steel is my body, and fire is my blood.”

When there was someone who incited conflict, I tortured their subordinates, placed loved ones under suggestion, and made them carry bombs.

When disease spread through a secluded village, I burned the carriers alive.

“I have created over a thousand blades.”

Betrayal became an everyday affair. The world reflected in my eyes was filled with sophistry, deceit, schemes, and self-love.

The more I saved, the more I saw the ugliness of mankind.

Days spent honing nothing but the art of killing—watching brains and hearts explode through a sniper scope, seeing how poison consumed the human body.

And each time, my heart grew covered in tiny cracks.

“Unknown to Death. Nor known to Life.”

I killed the one I loved.

I killed my beloved family.

That was why I couldn’t stop.

I soothed grief with fury, and eased suffering with hatred.

“Embraced regret to create many weapons.”

That way of life was no longer human—yet far from the ideal I had once sought.

People called me a demon. But I couldn’t stop.

If I didn’t keep scattering the “malice” I named “justice,” even the one promise I had left would vanish.

The only light left in a heart steeped in regret and despair. The only hope left in Pandora’s box.

『You will grow up to be a fine person.』

Keeping that promise was all I had——and so…

“——That’s enough, Emiya Shirou!!”

Suddenly, the world was swallowed in darkness. The blackness devoured everything, freeing me from myself.

At once, a blinding flash burned my eyes. My eyelids had been forcibly pried open.

“What are you—!!”
“Watch out!!”

Before I knew it, I had projected my well-worn twin blades. As naturally as breathing——

“…Ah.”

And then I realized. There was a girl in front of me. Blood ran down her arm.

A girl I didn’t know. A black-haired girl…

“——!”

No. I did know her. She was Saber. The Saber I knew.

“Se—Saber!! I’m sorry, I…”

Ah, what have I done? To hurt her—it was the worst thing imaginable. Sorrow and anger welled up inside me.

I had almost killed her again. Even though I had sworn in my heart never to make that mistake again…

“I—I… I’m sorry. Truly… I’m so sorry, Saber.”

Despair gnawed at my heart. I wanted to scream. I wanted to claw at my head until my brain was nothing but a mess.

“Sh–Shirou. I’m totally fine, really. So, calm down, okay?”
“Really!? You’re not just forcing yourself, are you!? You always push yourself too hard… Ah, we need to disinfect that right away.”
“I–I said I’m fine! More importantly, are you okay!? You’re acting weird!”

Weird. She said I was weird. My heart tightened, my breathing grew ragged. I’d let her down.

After finally… finally seeing her again, why… why did I…

“Shirou!!”

Saber grabbed my shoulders. Her hands were still small—exactly as I remembered them.

Such adorable hands. Back then, during those moments, Sato had always wanted to hold hands. She’d said it made her feel safe.

“Step back, Saber. I… kind of messed up.”
“Messed up? What do you mean!?”

Sato started to step away. No… I didn’t want her to. I couldn’t bear it. We’d only just reunited.

Even if this was just a dream in the moments before death, I didn’t care. I had so much I wanted to say—

“…It’s a bit rough, but…”

Suddenly, a woman stepped between us, murmuring strange words.

They were sounds I couldn’t even recognize as language. The next instant, bizarre images poured into my mind.

From my first meeting with Sato, all the way to this very moment——

“…No.”

These were my memories with Saber. Words that only I had exchanged with her pulled my consciousness back.

Dizzy, I looked at Saber again.

It was fine. I was myself again. I’d been in danger, but I’d made it back.

“Sorry… I was just… overwhelmed by Archer’s memories.”

“Are you… really okay?”

Saber’s eyes held deep concern. Maybe it was the lingering traces of Archer’s awareness, but I felt an even stronger rush of affection for her than before.

It irritated me somehow. Almost like he had loved Saber more than I did—and that pissed me off.

I slapped my own cheeks, driving out the remnants of his consciousness. As myself, I’d love Saber even more than he ever could. I stared at her with that resolve.

“…Wait, this isn’t the time for that!! S–Sorry, Saber, for suddenly attacking you like that…”

Blood was still flowing down Saber’s arm.

“I–It’s fine, really.”

“No, it’s not fine! Caster, can you heal her?”

I turned to her with a pleading look. Caster let out a deep sigh, then nodded and began casting healing magic on Saber’s arm.

“…Better now?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t forget, I used to be a man, you know? A scratch like this is nothing.”

I let out an involuntary sigh. It was in moments like this that I worried about her.

“If it hurts, just say so. It hurts me more when you force yourself to hide it.”

“…Yeah. It hurt… a little.”

“I’m sorry…”

I stroked her blood-stained arm, apologizing. Of all things, I’d hurt her with my own hands.

“…I thought I understood Archer.”

“Shirou…?”

“I thought I understood his hatred and fury. But… I was way off.”

Shaking my head, I let the words spill out.

“Of course I was… There’s no way anyone but the person who’s actually done it could truly understand what it’s like to… kill Saber… to kill the one they love.”

“…But you do understand now, don’t you?”

“Just a little… And besides, the way he lived and the way I live are far too different. But——”

Even so, he could still be a guidepost. That projection earlier was proof of it. I felt like I’d finally grasped the true nature of my projection magic.

I didn’t have anywhere near enough mana to unleash its full potential, but there’s a world of difference between understanding and not understanding.

“——Now, I think I might actually be some help.”

“Then I’m glad,” Saber said.

Caster let out a long breath.

“Honestly, I thought I’d failed…”

“…I can’t dive that deep again. I don’t think I’d ever come back.”

“Shirou…”

Either way, it was sheer luck that I’d returned.

I couldn’t say it out loud—after putting on such a brave front for Saber—but it had been dangerously close.

In that moment, I really had become Archer. And the love I felt for Saber, compared to the love he had for his Saber… it felt somehow different.

Deeper… and…

"...Let’s drop it."

That past of his belongs only to him. It’s better not to pry too deeply.

Even if we’re the same person in some sense, there’s a matter of courtesy. It might be a little late to say that now, but...

"For now... I’m feeling a bit tired."

"Good work. Dinner’s ready, so you can eat whenever you like."

"Huh!? Is it already that late!?"

"Yep."

I hurriedly glanced outside—the sky had already gone dark.

"The bath’s ready too. Which will it be?"

"Then... I’ll eat first. It wouldn’t be right to keep everyone waiting."

"Oh, that’s fine. Everyone except Saber’s already eaten."

"...I see."

Caster said it so casually, but it left me feeling oddly conflicted.

"Well, you know... everyone’s been busy running around, so they must’ve been hungry."

"No, it’s fine. I was just foolish to assume they’d be waiting for me..."

I shouldn’t feel lonely. Saber waited for me—that’s more than enough.

"...Actually, maybe I’ll take a bath first."

Yes... more than enough. I shouldn’t think of them as coldhearted.

"Shirou..."

Not long ago, eating alone didn’t bother me at all. But lately, being used to meals with a big group, I can’t help but feel a little lonely...

"Um... S-so, want me to wash your back?"

"N-no, I’m fine!!"

I hurriedly stopped Saber’s overly bold suggestion.

She probably didn’t mean anything by it... but for me, that was dangerous. After reliving Archer’s past, I’m honestly afraid that a sudden impulse could push me over the edge.

I want to keep my relationship with Saber proper and wholesome. Once all this trouble is over, I’ll take on more part-time jobs. I’ll need a lot of money for marriage funds and other things.

"Kid... your grin’s getting kind of dangerous-looking."

"...I’ll just go take a bath."

Seeing Caster’s strained expression, I quickly straightened my face.

And then—

"What the!?"

Suddenly, the lights in the mansion went out, and a streak of light ran across the ground.

"...Looks like we have a visitor."

Caster was the first to move, darting outside. Saber and I followed right after.

Once outside, we saw the form of a pegasus soaring through the sky.

"Rider!?"

"No, it’s not!!"

At Saber’s denial, I squinted at the rider’s back.

And there—

"Shinji!?"

Rider was nowhere to be seen—only Shinji sat astride the pegasus.

"Hey, Emiya."

Shinji waved with an almost refreshing smile, as if we had gone back to before the Holy Grail War ever began.

"...What do you want?"

Sweat beaded on my forehead. This Shinji wasn’t the Shinji I knew.

Even after seeing Archer’s past, I still couldn’t get a grasp on what he had become.

"...Come on. Since when did you start looking at me like that?"

"—!"

Shinji’s pained expression made my guard loosen for an instant.

"S-Shinji, you—"

"Sorry. That wasn’t fair of me just now."

He cut off my words to offer an apology.

I had no idea what he was playing at.

"Shinji..."

"Emiya... come to the Greater Grail. We’ll settle this there."

"...Isn’t there any way to avoid fighting?"

I asked, almost pleading.

Even now, I just couldn’t think of Shinji as my enemy. Sure, he’d done terrible things—but that was because we’d been caught in the abnormal madness of the Holy Grail War.

The real Shinji was just a little arrogant... but deep down, he had to be a good guy.

"No way. The only way to avoid it is for you to drop out. I need the Grail too."

"Shinji!! The Grail is tainted!! Even if you win, your wish—"

"Hey now, Emiya. Are you insulting me? I’m fully aware the Grail is tainted. I’m saying I need it regardless."

"Wh-why!? Your wish won’t come true!"

For some reason, Shinji suddenly started laughing.

"A normal wish won’t come true, sure. That’s where you’re mistaken."

I didn’t understand what he meant. With the Grail in its current state, the only wish it could grant was—

"...Shinji. Just what do you intend to wish for?"

"To make all humanity into food for Sakura. In other words—wipe everyone out."

The words wouldn’t come. I couldn’t comprehend what he was saying.

"...Eh? Huh? Wha—what do you mean...?"

"Since we’re here, I’ll tell you. Sakura can’t be saved anymore. The day she was taken from the Tohsaka house to the Matou household, she was tortured nonstop. With the Grail fragment and Artoria in his hands, Zouken tortured her relentlessly to strip her of her personality."

"W-what are you—"

"Exactly what I said. With the goal of breaking her mind, he tortured her without end. She was destroyed as a little girl, before she even made it to middle school."

"T-that can’t be!! I was with Sakura—"

"Even broken, she could still speak, still act. She could even put on a convincing performance. On Zouken’s orders, she was spying on you the whole time."

"...You’re lying."

"It’s the truth. Everything she did was an act. Behind the scenes, she literally consumed human flesh and blood. She still does. She’s not human anymore."

"That’s a lie!!"

I clenched my teeth, desperately trying to shake off Shinji’s words.

I could clearly recall my days with Sakura. At first, yes—her expression had often been dark. But over time, as she spent her days with Fuji-nee and me—

"It’s true, Emiya... But I’m grateful to you. Even if it was just an act, at least on the surface she was able to live as a human being. It was only for a short while, but I’m glad you gave her that experience."

Those words were so earnest... they knocked the breath out of me.

"...You’re lying, right?"

"...It’s the truth."

My legs wavered. It felt like my entire sense of reality was crumbling away... like the whole world was collapsing around me.

"Shirou!!"

Saber caught me before I could fall.

"Sakura can’t be saved anymore. Even if the Grail could erase her memories or purify her body, it wouldn’t change the fact that the Sakura who suffered all that agony can never be rescued. Either way, those ten years are lost forever. And that... that’s just too cruel, isn’t it?"

Shinji went on.

"The only thing I can still do for her... is make sure she eats something delicious—just once more. That’s why... I’ve decided to kill every last human in this world to make that happen."

"...Shinji."

My body trembled. I could see it now—there was no stopping him.

He was the same as Archer. Consumed by a single, obsessive conviction, willing to throw away everything for it. Even knowing there was only ruin ahead, he couldn’t stop walking toward it.

"...Which means we have no choice but to fight."

"Shinji... I—"

Before I could shout, Shinji suddenly tossed a Boston bag at my feet.

"...What’s this?"

"Go on. Open it."

The bag hit the ground with a heavy thud.

A bad feeling washed over me. A very, very bad feeling.

"Don’t touch it, boy..."

Caster stopped me as I hesitated, reaching out.

She slowly pointed a finger at the bag. The zipper began moving on its own.

It slid open, and inside was—

"――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――ah..."

I vomited, emptying the contents of my stomach.

I’d grown used to blood. I’d accepted death long ago.

But the thing lying there mocked my resolve, shaking me to my core.

Inside the Boston bag was the severed head of Mitsuzuri Ayako—the captain of my archery club and my friend.

She must have suffered terribly. Her face was twisted in an almost demonic distortion.

"That’s just a warning. Be under the Greater Grail by sunrise. Otherwise, the one person you care about more than anyone will die."

"...No way..."

The words "the one person you care about most" immediately brought Saber’s face to mind. But she was right here.

That meant... someone not here—someone irreplaceable to Emiya Shirou—someone who could only be—

"Y-you... what did you do to Fuji-nee!?"

My rage instantly boiled over, hitting its limit.

"I’ve taken her hostage. Rider’s already set up Bloodfort Andromeda on Mount Enzo. She’s got a charm for now, but it’s set to break at dawn. Even you should understand, idiot. If you want to save Fujimura, you’ll have to get to the Greater Grail before sunrise."

"You... you bastard..."

"...Hmph. You talk too much."

My vision was on the verge of going completely white with rage when Caster’s voice rang out.

"...Ah, I figured you’d pull something like that."

"Tch... So that’s how it is."

Caster suddenly froze mid-movement, unnaturally still.

"You understand, don’t you? If I die, Fujimura dies instantly. And when that happens, Emiya won’t be able to fight. That woman’s special to him, after all."

Caster glared at Shinji with undisguised loathing.

"What’s wrong?" Saber asked.

"...It seems he’s planted some sort of poison inside his body. If he’s interfered with by magecraft, it’ll kill him instantly."

"What!?"

I whipped my head toward Shinji.

"...Emiya. I’ll be waiting in front of the Greater Grail."

With that, Shinji vanished into the distance, Pegasus carrying him away.

"...Shinji..."

I couldn’t move. My mind couldn’t keep up with everything that had just happened.

And then—someone appeared, throwing me into even deeper confusion.

"...Tch. Looks like things just got complicated."

The blue spearman strode boldly into view, the crimson spear slung casually over his shoulder.

"You’re going, right?"

I didn’t need to ask what he meant. I knew.

"...Of course. I’m going to save Fuji-nee."

"...Okay. If you’re going, then the others won’t have a choice but to move too. This is the start of the final battle. Which means—"

Lancer lifted his voice toward the sky.

"Then we’re going too, right, Bazett!?"

After glaring into the empty air for a few moments, Lancer’s lips curled into a feral grin.

"Thanks."

He turned back toward us.

"That’s how it is."

"...Wait—what do you mean, ‘that’s how it is’?"

We were all baffled by his cryptic behavior.

Lancer gave an exasperated snort.

"Isn’t it obvious?"

A wicked grin spread across his face.

"—The alliance is back together."