Chapter 123: Spam Messages
"There’s a direct message."
"Oh, it already came?"
Top Chat: What’s it say, what’s it say?
Top Chat: Curious!
Top Chat: Read it out loud!
"‘My husband is so obsessed with hauling giant isopods ashore that he won’t pay me any attention.’"
"That’s… definitely not the right one!?"
Top Chat: Spam message for sure!
Top Chat: Stop with the oddly intriguing titles
Top Chat: lol
"‘Please help me make freeze-dried tofu at Mount Koya in my boyfriend’s place.’"
"Doesn’t sound right."
"‘I got dumped because I don’t understand baseball. Looking for someone to teach me how to use a hit-and-run.’"
"Nope."
"‘I’m looking for a boyfriend, but I accidentally discovered how to win the lottery and now international agencies are after me.’"
"That’s not it either."
"‘My husband was too bland in bed, my frustration exploded, and everything within a three-kilometer radius got leveled.’"
"Onii-chan! Don’t read the lewd ones! You’ll get banned!"
Top Chat: Was that lewd though…?
Top Chat: They’re just piling them up nonstop
Top Chat: Why are they all aimed at men
Top Chat: Even though Elf-san’s such a cute girl!
"I’m a guy."
Top Chat: Classic line, thanks again
Top Chat: Much appreciated
Top Chat: …Oh right
Top Chat: Huh?
Top Chat: Elf-san’s registered as ‘male,’ huh
Top Chat: Ah, on the profile
Top Chat: So the bots just carpet-bomb based on that info
Top Chat: Yeah, sounds about right
"If I switch it to female, will they stop?"
Top Chat: You’d just start getting the female-targeted spam instead
Top Chat: There’s no way to completely block it
Top Chat: Reminds me of when the Boozy Loli blew up about it
Top Chat: Timing on that was god-tier lol
"Boozy Loli?"
"She’s a senpai from 2.5D."
Top Chat: Drinks while gaming in a little girl avatar
Top Chat: Then drinks too much and pukes
Top Chat: Why doesn’t she ever learn… we set out into the jungle to solve this mystery
Top Chat: It’s supposed to be part of her ‘challenge runs’
"Challenge run?"
Top Chat: It’s when you impose restrictions on yourself while gaming
Top Chat: Like not using certain items, or sticking to one route
Top Chat: Some even forbid key inputs
Top Chat: Doing multiple games at once fries your brain
"So people play like that too."
Top Chat: And the Boozy Loli calls hers a ‘brain challenge run’—drinking alcohol while playing
Top Chat: Sometimes she even jump ropes to speed up the buzz
Top Chat: Each retry means more drinks, until it’s total chaos
Top Chat: When she mixed up the culprit and victim in a mystery game, I lost it
Top Chat: Don’t forget, she used to be an RTA runner
"RTA?"
Top Chat: Short for ‘real-time attack’
Top Chat: You race to clear the game or reach a goal as fast as possible
Top Chat: Popular games have tons of runners and the strategies get polished, so it’s great to watch
Top Chat: Boozy Loli was once the fastest woman in the world!
"The fastest in the world."
Top Chat: Was, though
Top Chat: Not a lie
Top Chat: Her game had a lot of runners, so being number one was seriously impressive
"Fastest in the world, huh. I wanna challenge her."
Top Chat: Uh oh, Elf-san found new prey
Top Chat: Run, run for your life—
Top Chat: Actually, Boozy Loli mentioned Elf-san on her stream the other day
Top Chat: What’d she say?
Top Chat: ‘No RTA runner wants to race someone who breaks the regulations!’
Top Chat: RE JEC TED
"Why?"
Top Chat: Honestly, fair
Top Chat: It’s not like useful new tricks just pop up every other day
Top Chat: Sometimes a glitch starts out as ‘it works but useless,’ then years later they find an application
Top Chat: Runners grind the same stage for hours to nail shortcuts
Top Chat: Very steady, painstaking work
Top Chat: Makes sense they’d be wary of Elf-san
Top Chat: But if you fear new records, the record itself loses value
Top Chat: Anyway, she’s a brain-challenge runner now!
Top Chat: Facts
"Hm."
"Kinda complicated, huh, Onii-chan."
"‘The new product you’ve been waiting for—just for you.’ Must be this one."
"Onii-chan?"
Top Chat: Still reading DMs lol
Top Chat: Is that the right one?
Top Chat: It says ‘new product,’ but doesn’t sound like the actual offer
"‘For those craving something to squeeze! Small breasts don’t satisfy your craving for squeeze. Only big ones give you that bounce! Our new product answers your need to grope breasts—’"
"Whaaaa!?"
"What’s wrong, Kyoka?"
"What’s wrong, you ask!? I told you, don’t read the lewd ones!"
Top Chat: Yup, spam confirmed
Top Chat: Called it
"I’ll find the right one."
"Mm."
"Let’s see, which one…?"
"Kyoka."
"What is it, Onii-chan?"
"Small ones really don’t squeeze well?"
"I don’t knoooow!"
Top Chat: That’s a terrible question lol
Top Chat: Keep it up, ask more
"I see."
"Geez, really."
"Then compare it with this one."
"This conversation is over!"
――This stream has ended――
Top Chat: Ah
Top Chat: Noooo
Top Chat: We almost had a Kyoka-chan gropes Elf-san’s boobs stream
Top Chat: Guaranteed ban if that happened
Top Chat: Definitely not okay
Top Chat: …But wait. Maybe it’s better this way… right?
Top Chat: You don’t sound convinced lol
Top Chat: Bro, you’re totally not over it… damn…
Top Chat: Eeeelf…
Top Chat: These guys (me included) are hopeless
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