Chapter 22: Ultra Clown

"I’ve got it! If I buy my own arcade cabinet, I can rack up way more practice than anyone else and totally become a pro gamer!"

There once was a young man with a… rather shallow thought process.

Not that he had no reasons at all. The truth was, this young man loved video games more than anything. Plus, he wanted to look cool and be popular. But yeah… still shallow.

"If I use the revolutionary strategy I’ve come up with, I can totally become a pro gamer… but I’ll need to figure out a source of income until then."

Even with his shallow mindset, the young man put at least some thought into his future.

"Alright! I’ll make money through game streaming! All a streamer has to do is play games and chat, so it’s an easy job! I’ll apply wherever they’re recruiting! Gahahaha!"

And thus, Homura Entarou, a VTuber under 《2.5D》, was born.

"Yes! Now I can live the ultimate gamer life!"

…Incidentally, he did not become popular.

"That’s why… I absolutely cannot lose…!"

He didn’t have a framed photo to swear on, and the pendant he clutched only had a picture of his dog inside — the same dog that had chewed up his shoes yesterday — but at least the vibe was there.

Top Chat: Oh! I just remembered something
Top Chat: What?
Top Chat: I’ve been wracking my brain this whole time like, “I know that voice!” but… isn’t Beard actually Homura Entarou?
Top Chat: Ahhhh
Top Chat: Now that you mention it, yeah, this does sound like him
Top Chat: And he’s totally the “ore-sama” type, so it fits perfectly

"Apparently, that’s you."

"Wh-what are you talking about, I have no idea, haha~"

Top Chat: Fake falsetto voice, lol
Top Chat: If you don’t wanna get exposed, at least act like it, dude, lol

"If I swoop in heroically to save my underling in his time of need, my subscriber count’s bound to shoot up!"

Top Chat: Lmao, that’s your motivation!?
Top Chat: To be fair, it’d work — as long as you don’t turn it into a pickup attempt afterward

"Hey! Ninety-eight percent of my subscribers are dudes! What’s wrong with wanting a little feminine energy on my channel!?"

Top Chat: My guy, this isn’t the time
Top Chat: The timing is… really not it
Top Chat: Save it for another occasion
Top Chat: Meanwhile, the “underling” is still dancing, btw

"Enough talk! It’s time for round two! Yellow-Green Girl, let’s go!"

"Yeah!"

As the giant starting signal prepared to announce the second race, Entarou exhaled deeply and slapped both his cheeks with his hands.

"SSHHH!"

Top Chat: Huh?
Top Chat: Fired himself up, I guess
Top Chat: Yeah, uh… Elf-san isn’t the kind of opponent you beat with “spirit power,” dude

"Oh?"

Top Chat: Beard’s slow off the line?
Top Chat: Yep, Beard’s behind
Top Chat: Alright, Elf-san, get that lead and keep it!

The second course was themed after a mining tunnel — a steep mountain track lined with sharp, consecutive hairpin turns. For a regular beginner, controlling speed here would’ve been a nightmare.

But of course, this Elf wasn’t “just” a beginner.

"Yup."

Top Chat: Clean turn!
Top Chat: Whoa, handled the descent like a pro
Top Chat: Can’t believe she didn’t kiss the guardrails even once on her first try
Top Chat: Elf-san’s still ahead of Beard — this is in the bag!

By the end of lap one, Elf-san was in first place, with Entarou re-entering the tunnel about 0.3 seconds behind.

"Hyah!"

Top Chat: Beard’s cornering’s improving
Top Chat: Lap time just dropped by over a full second!

"Getting the hang of it. Next lap, I’ll cut it down even more!"

Top Chat: Hmm, confident
Top Chat: Normally we’d laugh this off, but…
Top Chat: This is Elf-san we’re talking about — she probably will do it

And sure enough, Elf steadily improved her lap times, tightening the race with each round.

"Alright, final lap!"

Top Chat: Okay, what’s the time gap now…
Top Chat: 0.3 seconds
Top Chat: Beard’s hanging on
Top Chat: …No, wait
Top Chat: He’s aiming for something

Up to this point, Entarou had maintained a position just under 0.3 seconds behind Elf, who was steadily improving her pace lap after lap.

After five laps, nobody could write this off as coincidence anymore.

Yes — Entarou had been deliberately staying behind, carefully avoiding showing Elf his optimal racing line.

Top Chat: Ohhh, nice, I love this kind of serious play
Top Chat: He could’ve just aimed for his personal best and nobody would’ve blamed him if he lost
Top Chat: Sticking it out like this instead? Respect

"Apparently, they’re praising you."

"…Seriously, Yellow-Green Girl, how do you even read chat while driving like this?"

"You get used to it."

Top Chat: Pretty sure you’ve been doing that since race one though
Top Chat: (Except Elf-san, apparently) “You get used to it”
Top Chat: I don’t think I’d ever “get used to” doing that, tbh

"You don’t wanna just be satisfied with a personal best?"

"Of course not! I’m here for one reason and one reason only—" Entarou bellowed, eyes blazing.
"—I play games to play games!"

Near the end of the course, the downhill corner loomed. As Elf shifted into vehicle control mode, Entarou finally made his move.

Four boost items stored.

Just like in the first race, Entarou used three in rapid succession, slingshotting right up behind Elf.

But Elf had been anticipating this from the start. Without hesitation, she slammed her own boost button, darting aside to evade.

And then—

"I… got played."

Top Chat: Huh?
Top Chat: Wait, WHAT!?
Top Chat: Elf-san just went flying!?
Top Chat: What the hell just happened!?
Top Chat: Homing boost! After triple acceleration, Beard angled the last boost right at Elf-san when she tried to escape!
Top Chat: THAT’S A THING!?

"…I see. So that wasn’t a trick for taking corners faster, huh."

"As if my secret technique would be something that cheap!" Entarou barked back, practically vibrating with pride.
"I chose this path for one reason only — so I could game, and game, and game forever!"

The man shallow in thought but deep in love for gaming, Homura Entarou, thrust his fist into the air and roared.

Top Chat: OHHHHHHHH!!!
Top Chat: ENTAROU! ENTAROU!
Top Chat: ENTAROU! ENTAROU!
Top Chat: …Still doesn’t make me wanna cheer for him as much as Kirishi-tan tho
Top Chat: True, true
Top Chat: Lmao