Chapter 15

"Yes, in exchange, could you teach me dancing and singing?"

"Nana-chan, do you want to become an idol?"

"No, it’s not exactly like that, but… I might get an offer to play an idol role, so I’d like to be prepared and capable of doing various things."

I’ve had roles before where I had to play a pianist using an abandoned piano in the woods, or a ballerina dancing in a hospital room for her sick twin brother—stuff like that. Piano and ballet lessons came in handy back then. I haven’t played an idol yet, but maybe someday there’ll be a role as a galactic songstress on some cultured planet of Yakku or something.

Still, if such a role came up, they’d probably give the offer to these real idols right in front of me. Probably.

"I want to say ‘don’t underestimate idols’… but Nana-chan, for you, becoming a top idol isn’t just a dream. How about it? Why not become an idol? If you’re an idol, you can be an actress too."

"Eh? No, um, I… don’t really plan on becoming an idol…"

"Don’t worry! We even have elementary school idols at our agency!"

"No, uh, that’s not it, I just don’t intend to become an idol…"

What’s with this? Izumi-san’s eyes are scary. She’s holding my hand, leaning in close, and even breathing heavily.

I actually plan to quit the entertainment industry after I graduate from elementary school, so I have no intention of aiming to become an idol. Honestly, watching Hiroto makes me think I should never become one. Idols have even less freedom than child actors, and I absolutely refuse to flirt with men for popularity. I used to be an old man anyway, so that’s a definite no.

If it’s just acting out an idol role, that’s fine. But becoming one? No thanks.

"Stop it. Don’t you dare try to poach her right in front of me."

With a quick motion, Shinozaki-san grabs me by the collar and yanks me away from Izumi-san. I’m not a cat, so holding me by the scruff is not only unpleasant, it’s choking me, and I’d really appreciate it if she’d stop.

"I only agreed to be your acting coach today as a special case. From now on, I won’t be doing any more acting lessons."

"No, but I just wanted to learn dance and singing… gwaah!"

Shinozaki-san silently yanks my collar again, choking me so my voice cuts off. Got it, that’s the ‘stop saying unnecessary things’ signal. Understood loud and clear.

"She said she wants to learn! Shouldn’t you let her?!"

"Of course not! Normally, there’s no way we’d give lessons to someone from another agency. This is already beyond what’s acceptable."

For some reason, Shinozaki-san and Izumi-san start arguing. I kind of want to say, “Don’t fight over me!”… but since my throat is being squeezed, I can’t actually get the words out.

As I blankly listen to their bickering, my carotid artery starts feeling tight, and I’m about to pass out. I twist Shinozaki-san’s hand just enough to loosen her grip and slip free.

"Um, sorry, but I really don’t intend to become an idol."

When I say that firmly, Izumi-san looks at me with sad eyes.

"So, you’re aiming to become an actress in the future, then?"

"No, actually, I’m planning to retire from the entertainment industry after I graduate from elementary school. Once compulsory education ends, my dream is to become a NEET!"

The entertainment industry is brutal—blink for a second and you’ll be forgotten and cast aside. That’s why I want to sharpen my skills and earn as much as I can now, so I can secure a carefree… retirement? Something like that.

"Eh? A… NEET?"

"Yes! A proud NEET! I’m saving up all my earnings for it."

Even though I confidently revealed my flawless life plan with a smug face, Izumi-san just stared at me like I was some incomprehensible alien. Shinozaki-san sighed deeply.

What? Come on, if you had enough money, who wouldn’t want to stop working?!

"I get it, I totally get it. I wanted to become a NEET too, but my family kicked me out. Just when I was about to end up on the streets, I got scouted into this job."

Momiji-san, my newfound comrade, throws an arm around my shoulder. When I offer her my hand in solidarity, she clasps it firmly. A true ally.

"N-no, no way! With that much talent, becoming a NEET would be such a waste!"

"Exactly! Nana, you’ve got talent. You should aim to become an actress instead."

Suddenly, Izumi-san and Shinozaki-san unite against me, both trying to crush my NEET dreams. But it’s useless. I’ve got Momiji-san on my side… or so I thought. When I glance over, she’s already standing at a distance, casually stretching.

Betrayed in an instant, our NEET alliance crumbles into dust. Well, I guess neither of us were NEETs yet anyway.

"Anyway, it’s getting late. Shouldn’t we head home? It’s already past nine."

My ultimate move: topic diversion.

They say when women gather, the chatter never ends, and true enough, we’d kept talking long after the lesson ended, losing track of time. The lights in the other practice rooms had already been turned off, and the other idols seemed to have gone home. Kotori-san’s manager had been glancing nervously at the clock for a while now.

"Oh my, look at the time. We’ve gone way over schedule. Let’s wrap this up quickly."

The lesson was supposed to end at seven, but we got so caught up that it’s this late already.

"Wait, what about teaching me the dance and singing?!"

"I said I’d teach you if you teach me in return. It’s supposed to be give-and-take…"

Izumi-san pleads, but I was just stopped earlier. Without Shinozaki-san’s permission, I can’t teach her anything. Time to use my secret weapon—tilt my head up, eyes slightly teary…

"Haa… fine. As long as you don’t do it at Goshiraha Iroha Pro or SunAka, I’ll turn a blind eye."

"…By ‘turn a blind eye,’ you mean?"

"I mean, if you teach each other privately, I’ll ignore it. Just don’t do it at the agency."

She stares at me for a moment, then Shinozaki-san finally caves and grants permission. Too easy.

"If we can’t use the agency, where should we practice?"

"There are rental studios, but… it’s better if you’re somewhere private. Nana’s house might be the best option."

"Oh, right! That reminds me!"

You know what they say, “darkest under the lighthouse.” Our house was so big that we’d converted a few of the extra rooms into a practice studio. It’s completely soundproof, so even if we practice late into the night, there’s no problem at all. Well, except Mom gets mad if we’re up too late and forces us to go to bed.

"So, let’s do it like this — whenever our schedules line up, we can practice together at my place."

"Eh…? You mean… I can go to Nana-chan’s house?"

"If you’d prefer, we can always rent a studio inste—"

"No! I’d love to do it at Nana-chan’s house!"

Izumi-san grabs my hand with alarming force, leaning in close. Her breathing’s rough, her face is way too close, and her eyes… are kind of scary.

I start to think I may have acted rashly, but… it’s far too late to take it back now. There’s no way I can say, “Actually, let’s cancel.”

"I’m pretty good at singing and dancing too. Can I come as well?"

"M-me too! Singing’s my strongest skill!"

Momiji-san and Kotori-san both ask if they can join, but this was originally Izumi-san’s idea — she’s the one who wanted lessons to catch up with the other two. If the three of them all train together, she might never catch up at all…

"I’ll leave that up to Izumi-san."

When I say that, both of them immediately turn to stare at Izumi-san. Without looking at them, she averts her gaze and mutters:

"Th-the three of us are BurePri, after all… so… it’s fine."

Her voice sounds forced, as if she’s shoving down some inner conflict before managing to answer.

"Right? We’re BurePri! The three of us, together!"

Momiji-san throws an arm around Izumi-san and laughs cheerfully. For just a moment, I swear I saw a glimpse of darkness behind Izumi-san’s smile… but nah, probably my imagination.

"By the way, I heard Nana-chan taught Kurotani-kun from COLORFUL. Was it something like what we did today?"

"No way. Back then, we were filming deep in the mountains. We couldn’t do anything like this."

After we finished cleaning up the equipment, Momiji-san casually brings it up. I sling the camera case over my shoulder and answer while zipping it shut.

"Right? I just heard you were helping him during breaks, so I was curious how you did it. How’d you teach him?"

"Mm… it was more about character-building than actual lessons. For some reason, Kurotani-kun didn’t like me at the time, so I started by becoming friends with him."

Back then, Hiroto had his hostility dialed up to max. Even though we were supposed to play childhood friends, he kept delivering his lines like he hated me — which obviously wasn’t okay. The director yelled at him nonstop and gave him hell for it.

Filming wasn’t progressing at all, and the atmosphere on set was getting worse by the day. So, I had no choice but to step in and do something about it.

"I became friends with him first. I started waking up early to go catch beetles together, we’d sneak off during filming breaks to play in the river, build secret bases in trees… I taught him all the countryside stuff, really bonded with him, and then slipped in some acting tips along the way."

"Oho… and that’s when love started to bloom, hmm?"

"Absolutely not. I only did it to build our characters properly."

Oh. So that’s where she was going with this. Figures. Women really do love to drag every conversation back to romance. Back when Hiroto hadn’t switched to being an idol yet, we co-starred a lot, so rumors about us were always floating around.

"My, my, Nana-chan, what a little heartbreaker you are. Making poor Kurotani-kun fall for you, only to toss him aside afterward?"

"It wasn’t like that at all. Think of it more like a theater game — just bonding exercises for better performances."

"Catching beetles isn’t what I’d call a ‘theater game,’ though."

If you’re some boring old man trying to get along with elementary school boys, beetle-hunting is absolutely essential.

When it comes to beetles, little boys are an easy win.