Chapter 38: God

After leaving the school, we decided to walk to the shrine.

The shrine was on the hill behind the school, but since there was a proper path, we just had to climb the slope right outside the school gate. Despite being called a “mountain,” it was only a few dozen meters tall, so we reached the top pretty quickly.

"It's still as run-down as ever, nya."

"Don’t they ever renovate it?"

"It looks worse than when I was here."

"Yeah, even back in my day, it was a little cleaner."

Ahead of us stood the torii gate, and beyond it was a shabby-looking shrine building.

"Let’s check it out, nya."

"Yeah, let’s go."

We passed under the torii and walked toward the main building. Looking around, we even spotted an old rusty swing set—it all gave off a kind of depressing atmosphere.

"This used to be an adult-magazine spot, you know."

"Yeah, I remember finding some lying around, nya."

"Man, it’s so run-down it’s actually creepy. Coming here at night would totally feel like a courage test."

"Right? It really was scary back then!"

Yeah… no thanks. I’m terrible with scary stuff.

We walked up to the shrine building and stopped in front of it. It looked old, but at least it was maintained—nothing was falling apart. There was even a clean-looking offering box placed out front.

"Everyone’s been here before, right?"

"Pretty much, nya. I’d say most students come at least once."

"Figures. I used to catch cicadas around here."

"Same here, pretty much."

Guess that counts as another shared experience.

"Alright, let’s pray."

I took a 100-yen coin from my wallet, tossed it into the offering box, closed my eyes, and pressed my hands together.

Dear god, please turn me back into a man.
And please, tie me to Kana-chan in eternal love.
I want to do naughty things.
I want her to do them to me too.
I want to get back at her for everything she’s done and make her say dirty things.

『You’ve got way too many lewd requests. Also, not 100 yen—hand over 10,000 yen. You promised, remember?』

…Huh?

"Hey, Nyako, don’t criticize other people’s prayers."

I opened my eyes and glared at Nyako.

"What are you talking about, nya?"

"Huh? That wasn’t you?"

Then who was it? Shachou? Or maybe Chihirocchi?

"No one said anything, though?"

"Are you hearing things? That’s kinda creepy."

…Excuse me?

"………………"

Without a word, I took a 10,000-yen bill from my wallet and dropped it into the offering box.

"What? Are you stupid, nya?"

"Ten thousand? That’s way too much."

"Big spender, huh?"

Ignoring all three of them, I closed my eyes again and prayed.

Dear god, please turn me back into a man.
And please, tie me to Kana-chan in eternal love.
I want to make her mine.
I want to push her until she begs for mercy.
I want payback for the time she made me cry out in embarrassment.

『Still filthy as ever… Well, maybe I’ll grant your wish. But first, kneel down and bow to me.』

…Huh?
Why?

『What, you seriously forgot?』

Forgot what?

『……Wait a moment.』

The voice faded away, so I opened my eyes.

"Hey, did you guys hear that?"

I turned around and asked the others.

"Hear what?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Eromi-neesan, are you okay?"

Wait, what?

"I mean—"

I froze mid-sentence.

Because from behind me came a sharp bang!

Slowly, I turned back toward the shrine.

There, standing in front of the main hall, was a young girl in a white shrine robe, her long black hair flowing in the wind.

"Who’s that?"

"A kid?"

"But something about her…"

I understood what Chihirocchi was getting at.

The girl in front of us was clearly just a child—and yet, for some reason, she didn’t feel like one.

Or rather, she didn’t feel human at all.

"Well then, shall I hear what you have to say?"

The girl floated up and sat on top of the offering box.

No, really—she sat on it.
Or more accurately, she was sitting midair above it.

If this wasn’t some kind of magic trick, then she definitely wasn’t human.

"A ghost."

"A spirit, nya."

"A youkai, right?"

"Nah, she’s totally a fairy."

"……You guys are saying that on purpose, aren’t you?"

Yeah… probably.

"Could she be… a god?"

If this wasn’t some elaborate prank, then coming out of the shrine like that probably meant exactly that.
Besides, her voice was the same one I’d heard earlier.

"Indeed! I am!"

"Then give me back my 10,000 yen."

Yeah, that was still a waste.

"What’s this? You don’t want to return to normal?"

"You can really turn us back?"

"That depends on all of you."

"Shachou, the money!"

I looked at Shachou, our resident rich girl, for help.

"How much are we talking?"

She opened her wallet.

"No, I don’t need it! I mean, I do—but I don’t!"

…Which is it?

"Um, Miss God, I guess? I’m not entirely sure how to address you, but were you the one who turned us into girls?"

Chihirocchi carefully chose her words before asking.

"Hmm… well, I suppose that’s right."

So she was the culprit…

"But why?"

"I simply granted your wishes. I wanted to fulfill the desires of my adorable parishioners."

Wishes?
Wait, are we even considered parishioners of this shrine?

"I never wished to become a girl!"

"Me neither!"

"Tama didn’t either, nya!"

"Same here!"

We all denied it right away.

"Oh, but you did. Let’s see—Eromi, you wished for a more exciting, vibrant life."

Did she just call me Eromi?
Hey, my name’s Megumi, thank you very much.

"Isn’t that what happened when I started dating Kana-chan?"

"No, that’s a separate matter. Getting together with Kana-chan was thanks to your own thoughtfulness and kindness. Well done."

Ehehe…
So that was my own doing, huh.

"Ah, so that’s what the 10,000 yen was about."

Right—back when I first thought I might end up dating Kana-chan, I promised to offer 10,000 yen to the shrine.
Totally forgot about that.

"Exactly. Now, as for you, Shachou—you achieved your goals through your own ability. But once you did, you lost your purpose in life. So, I decided to give you a little gift to help you find the next one."

"Huh? Well, that’s true, but this? This isn’t a gift I wanted."

Shachou still didn’t look convinced.

"Next is you, Chihirocchi. You’ve been hung up on that girl who dumped you for way too long. So this is a change of pace."

"…Huh?"

"Now you can get along naturally. Isn’t that great? Be friends again and give it another shot."

"No, that’s not how it works. We’re in different classes now, and being a girl doesn’t exactly fix that problem."

"And lastly—Tama."

The god completely ignored Chihirocchi’s protest.

"What about Tama, nya?"

"I felt bad for you. You cut ties with your friends and family, so I decided to give you new companions. Rejoice."

"Wait, why does mine sound totally different!? Like I just got dragged into this by accident, nya!"

Yeah… she kind of had a point.

"God, I get that you’re saying you granted our wishes, but isn’t something off here? It doesn’t really feel like any of them came true."

First of all, there was no reason to turn us into girls.

"That’s true. Because this is punishment."

…Punishment?
As in divine punishment?

"Why?"

"Eromi, you’re a natural-born scumbag, that’s why. As for the rest of you—have you reflected on what you did back then?"

The god turned her gaze to the other three.

"………………"

"………………"

"………………"

The three of them exchanged looks, then all tilted their heads in unison.

"…You guys too, huh."

No, seriously—what did we even do?