Chapter 27: 11:25 AM

The door was blown off, and a roaring sound echoed.

The customers inside the cafe stirred with alarm, wondering what was happening, and focused on the entrance. Then, a smoke bomb was tossed inside, and the interior was instantly filled with smoke.

The cafe, Ahnenerbe, which had maintained a classic atmosphere, was ruined in an instant. Not only that, but the various gourmet dishes—which a certain husband/master cook had prepared and which the patrons were enjoying along with the atmosphere—were also spoiled.

It must be a good fortune for the attackers, one might say, that the hungry King of Knights was not present. If she had been there, she would have immediately grabbed her Aho-ge (Stupid-hair), transformed into her Alter form, and annihilated the attackers.

However, even without her, the customers’ frustration rose at having their holiday ruined. "What kind of idiot would do such a thing?!" they thought, fixing their gaze on the cafe's entrance with killing intent and hostility.

The 'Lustful Pink Caster,' a.k.a. Casko (Caster-Fox), was also reaching peak fury after her sweet, affectionate time with her Master was interrupted.

"Heh, heh-heh-heh. To interrupt my date with my Master... you must be really begging to die, nya~"

Casko’s damage was not limited to the smoke from the smoke bomb. One of the thrown smoke bombs hit their table directly.

It happened during the "Ahn" exchange—that legendary act of feeding each other a bite of food, which is, in some circles, an urban legend, and which virgin boys across the nation aspire to do with their sweethearts.

As a result, the smoke bomb exploded at close range, covering her entire body in smoke, and utterly destroying both the fine food and the sweet atmosphere.

She had been busy cleaning up the mess caused by her own tail, and had finally found a moment of peace. She was currently living a quiet life with her Master—or rather, the man who was her husband—in a small four-and-a-half-tatami-mat apartment in the corner of SE.RA.PH. She was uninterested in power or wealth, having survived countless deadly battles. She had been dealing with various interferences from global powers and handling the troublesome problems brought in by her comrades who had also survived the same death lines. Now, just when she finally had a moment to breathe, another trouble arrived.

As a result, Casko's magical power boiled up throughout her body, and she was consumed by rage, scattering murderous intent around her. Though her mouth was characterized as the sweetest and most flirtatious character in the Nasuverse, her belly was black and her mind was surprisingly rational and calculating, just like a certain apron-wearing individual.

(Now, now, I'm conflicted about whether to curse them to death or render them physically incapacitated... But what kind of idiot would launch an attack here, where Heroic Spirits, a Vampire, a Homunculus, and a God-Slayer are gathering?!) Casko thought, internally yelling.

As Casko inwardly noted, this place was a bargain sale of supernatural beings. In addition to the Heroic Spirits she had once fought, there was a Vampire innocently eating curry, and a silver-haired Nun who was a waitress but clearly had a complicated background. There were many others, but it would be endless to list them one by one, showing how truly diverse the clientele was.

And every single one of them had unnecessarily high combat power. Honestly, there's no way to describe the assailants who would pick a fight in such a place other than idiots.

Perhaps because of this, everyone in the cafe was intensely curious about the identity of the person who had dared to challenge them.

Some were wary, glaring at the entrance.

Some were brimming with curiosity.

Others took a detached view, concluding that yet another bunch of chaotic individuals had arrived.

Eventually, the smoke cleared. The figure that gradually became visible was not human—

"Nya-ha-ha-ha! Ahnenerbe has been occupied by us, nya!"

...A poorly-defined "live thing" stood there!

".................."

Silence, or rather, an awkward air, dominated the cafe, as no one knew how to react.

"Nyu-fufufu—it looks like they are speechless after seeing my heroic figure, nya."

The "live thing" mistook the customers' silence for being intimidated by its presence, puffed out its chest, and looked around with the most self-satisfied "I told you so" expression possible.

"No, Nya, they must be mesmerized by my beautiful appearance," another "live thing" behind the first one muttered in a deep, refined voice.

Several customers were startled because the voice was instantly recognizable—it sounded exactly like a certain Mapo Tofu Priest. Casko, too, was so surprised that she and her Master almost tumbled over, as the voice was identical to a certain General Store Clerk.

(W-wait, you guys...!! Wh-what is this—!!)

Consider this: the deep, gravelly voice of a hulking priest, nearly 190 cm tall. That was the "George Voice" Casko knew. Yet, it was being uttered by a cat-like, poorly-defined "live thing."

The sheer absurdity of it—far from being "gap moe"—was enough to shatter one's sanity. The only reason Casko's sanity held was thanks to surviving numerous battlegrounds in the Holy Grail Wars.

"W-what did you say—!

It's unthinkable for you to gain popularity over my blonde heroine element, nya!!" The blonde, red-eyed "live thing" clashed with the gray "live thing."

In the Nasuverse, blonde heroines, such as Fate's Saber and Tsukihime's Arcueid, boast high popularity. The "live thing," or rather, Neco-Arc, was also a blonde-haired character and burned with rivalry against Neco-Chaos.

However, at this creature's statement, every human in the cafe, regardless of their race or species, instantly unified in their thoughts.

"Hmph, unfortunately, I am not in the heroine bracket; I am in the villain bracket. Also, this deep voice is my trade, and I am a popular figure being pulled into various media. Recently, I've even starred as the protagonist in Wolfenstein: The New Order. Oh, to everyone on the other side of the screen, there are play-through videos on Nico Nico Douga, so please check them out."

"No, no, no, that's the voice actor, nya!"

Wolfenstein: The New Order—a legendary game that established the foundations of FPS—was renewed for the PS4 this June. With its realistic depictions, flashy action, and detailed world-building, it's a magnificent game that is highly recommended.

"Um, so, why did you come here?" Illyasviel von Einzbern timidly asked the "live things" who had just burst in and started their internal commotion.

"M-Mugh, you... you are the eternal rival of the blonde heroine, the silver-haired loli heroine who boasts strong popularity in every dimension—!!"

The self-proclaimed heroine "live thing" trembled at the sight of Illya. This was because, in countless two-dimensional worlds, silver-haired heroines are special. While blonde hair exists in reality, silver hair is rare and almost phantom-like in the three-dimensional world. One could even say that silver hair is a creature that only inhabits the two-dimensional world. Thus, silver-haired heroines depicted in many two-dimensional works are often portrayed as mysterious and fantastical beings.

The strength of their personality as characters leads to their high popularity. Furthermore, a heroine who also has loli elements is arguably the ultimate heroine, one who could even overshadow the blonde heroine!

"Hey, don't point at people and.... W-what are you talking about—!?"

However, the sensible Illya from Prisma Illya blushed at Neco-Arc's remarks. If this were the Illya from Fate, she would have jumped on the topic and boasted about her character status with a smug look... although there would be a high probability of her Guardian (Berserker) flying in and mincing the other party.

"Oh, did you forget about me, you monster cat? Me, the one who is tanned, a loli, silver-haired, and loves her Onii-chan!"

However, Chloe von Einzbern, who had a personality closer to the Fate Illya—an adult mind in a loli body, a self-aware little devil loli—looked down at the "live things" with the most self-satisfied expression possible.

"Wha-What did you say... Tanned, silver-haired... and a loli little devil character, nya!?"

"Kuh, not only that, nya, the character who loves Onii-chan is a concept that—we cannot achieve...!!"

A little sister who loves her big brother—this concept cannot be established without a pre-existing sibling relationship. Neco-Arc and Neco-Chaos recoiled in terror at the wall that stood before them, which was as flat as a certain idol's chest.

"Fufufun, and that's not all. I'm finally scheduled to debut in anime this summer, so my popularity is about to soar. Oh, that's irrelevant talk for you two, who haven't shown moving forms since Carnival Phantasm, ahahaha!"

Chloe was triumphant, knowing that Prisma Illya 2wei! was scheduled to air on July 9, 2014. In contrast, the stray cats hadn't shown their moving forms since Carnival Phantasm in 2012.

"T-This is the confidence of a heroine, nya..."

Neco-Arc lost the will to fight, overwhelmed by the sheer power of the heroine. To her (whether or not she is actually female is debatable), Chloe seemed like a symbol of an unattainable dream, or an eternally insurmountable obstacle, much like a certain guard who took an arrow to the knee, regardless of how hard a certain idol tries to grow her bust.

Neco-Arc should have admitted she wasn't worthy of being a heroine, turned around, and retreated. However, one word from the overconfident Chloe suddenly changed the situation.

"This summer, I'm not just going to capture my big brother's heart; I'm going to snatch the main heroine spot in TYPE-MOON from Saber!"

"But, if we limit it to Fate, Red Saber from Extra and Casko are strong competitors," Miyu pointed out calmly to the hyped-up Chloe.

Normally, Chloe would have known that such a comment should never be uttered in that place. However, the thought of her own debut that summer had excited her, and she had lost her composure and blurted it out.

"Huh, well, the certain tone-deaf dragon heroine aside, I don't even notice that blonde heroine with unnecessary fat or that lewd pink spinster heroine."

In that instant, a vortex of magical power stirred up the cafe. The physical wave of energy flipped plates and cups. Killing intent overflowed everywhere, and the air froze.

"What did you just say...?"

It was Casko. Normally, she would just fire off some sarcasm, but having her date interrupted already annoyed her, and being called a spinster made her completely snap.

Chloe realized she had stepped on a landmine, but it was too late. She was merely a punching bag to vent Casko's frustration.

"Oh no, trouble again!?" Illya lamented, caught in the crossfire.

But a helping hand was offered by an unexpected person.

"Well, isn't it the truth? She's often called a mature woman at 16, and an old hag at 18. Plus, if you count the time she was a goddess, I think she's the undisputed King of Spinsters."

"Agh—!! Where is the person who wants to die!!"

Casko turned her face towards the owner of the voice, furious at the excessive insult. The customers in the cafe also paid attention, viewing the commotion as entertainment. No one seemed willing to stop it; only Casko's Master was trying to pacify the enraged Nine-Tailed Fox, but to no effect.

"I see, looking at you now, there's no doubt you're a beautiful woman. But you're hiding something up your sleeve... and you're not my type," the person Casko faced was a young boy with red eyes and blonde hair. The boy, who possessed an unnaturally refined beauty, evaluated Casko with an arrogant tone.

For a moment, Casko's anger gauge rose even higher at being called a spinster by a boy who was barely ten years old, but then she noticed something unusual.

Indeed, he looked like a handsome boy. However, the magical power overflowing from his body surpassed that of any nearby mage. And Casko, who had lived in the Age of Gods, recognized that familiar aura.

(W-what is this! This boy is like my past self, or even greater—)

There once was the Age of Gods. It was a time when humans were still fragile beings and feared, worshipped, and believed in the gods. But as time advanced, people began to regard the gods as fantasies, and the gods' authority declined. Today, it could be said that the existence of gods has almost vanished, but the boy proved that the gods, now phantoms, were still alive.

"It seems you've figured out my identity, but I'm angry right now, so I have no intention of forgiving you. I have to pay you back because Yukika's clothes got dirty from your little magical wave just now."

She shifted her gaze slightly to the side and saw a girl sitting at the same table, tearfully trying to wipe a cream pasta stain off her clothes. Judging by the boy's tone, the food must have overturned due to the magical power wave Casko released, dirtying the clothes.

Furthermore, if she listened closely, she could hear the girl muttering, "The clothes I just bought..." and "What should I do? This month is tight...," confirming that Casko was entirely at fault.

(I messed up! ...Even I have to admit this one is my fault.) Casko regained her composure and realized the gravity of the situation. She was about to offer an apology, but the boy acted first.

"Ah, I'm not interested in excuses or apologies, so just shut up and take your beating."

Immediately after, a Noble Phantasm flew towards Casko. The next moment, smoke and a roar erupted, and Casko's figure vanished.

However, Casko was safe and sound. Wiping away the smoke, she had changed from her private clothes to her Servant form. Noble Phantasm mirrors were revolving around her, suggesting she had intercepted the boy's projectile with them.

"...Very well. If that's your attitude, then I will prepare myself too!"

Casko accepted the challenge, abandoning her flirtatious thoughts and standing as Servant Caster. And next to her stood her partner, ready as her Master from the Holy Grail War.

"Heh, it's not the first time I've hunted a fox. I want you to show me what you can do!" the boy, Kid Gil, or Gilgamesh, responded to Casko's words by deploying more Noble Phantasms.

"Do not underestimate the bond we swore to protect my Master from all sharp points and to guard my Master from all wicked hands with absolute, invincible steel—the bond that promised a life together...!!" Casko was fully motivated as well.

There was nothing left to say; all that remained was to fight.

"Now, let's begin."

"Yes, let's!"

The next moment, Noble Phantasms flew inside the cafe, and a war erupted with magical energy intertwining. The cafe was quickly destroyed by the Noble Phantasms, which were weapons of mass destruction, and the Grand Magecraft unleashed by Casko. The customers, realizing they couldn't just enjoy the fight with food anymore, fled, and some even started brawling themselves. The peaceful atmosphere of the cafe was utterly shattered.

"...Um, everyone, I don't think fighting is a good idea, nya?" Neco-Arc called out to the drastically changed situation, but no one was listening.

Leaving the Neco-Arcs, who were arguably the catalyst for this whole commotion, the cafe descended into an all-out brawl.