Chapter 22: I Want to Escape from the Prefect Team Chair – Part 1

Hello, good morning, good evening. It’s me—Fuyuhi Kou.

It’s been a little while since that incident where I unexpectedly ran into an old acquaintance, got set up by an informant, and ended up in a disaster of a mess. And now, we of the Helmets Gang are enjoying what you’d call our golden age.

Thanks to our connection with Yatsude Shie—who’s been letting us take a cut from several of her shops since back then—business is booming and the money’s pouring in. We’re earning more than that Jab-Jab Helmets Gang run by Rabu and his idiot crew. Of course, that has other helmet gangs and delinquent groups jumping us out of jealousy or whatever—but rough work is our specialty. It’s practically what we’re built for.

Our boss, Hibana-chan, is strong enough to take on the Valkyries—and even the Prefect Team, as long as the Chair herself doesn’t show up. Even if the rest of us (myself included) are just random nobodies, there’s no way we’d lose to some helmet gang or small-time punks.

So yeah. We were at the peak of our game.

Which is probably why…

『Kou-san, this is bad! The truck got stolen!』

"...Huh?"

—That moment of carelessness happened.

"Step on it! We can’t catch up!"

"I am stepping on it! But with this junker of a bike…!"

"Why didn’t we replace it when we had the chance!?"

"Fwahahaha!!! We of the Kivotos Transporter Alliance—also known as the Burururung Biker Union—will be taking this truck’s cargo! We’ll deliver it in your place and collect the delivery fee!"

Racing down the highway was our beat-up bike—me and one of our members riding tandem—chasing after the truck that originally belonged to us, now stolen by those punks calling themselves the Burururung Biker Union. Several of their modified bikes surrounded it as they sped along.

Damn it! What a stupid name! I’ve never heard of the Burururung Biker Union! And how the hell do you get that ridiculous name from “Kivotos Transporter Alliance”!? And—shit! Their driving is reckless! Think about the damn cargo, you idiots!

『K-Kou-san!? Are you okay!?』

"Shie… sorry. We, uh, might be dealing with something annoying."

『Uuu… If this keeps up, we won’t have enough for the afternoon shift… The customers will be upset…』

"Ugh— I-I’ll figure something out! Really! Just leave it to us!"

『R-Right! Please do!』

I hung up the call with little Shie-chan. We practically begged her to let us take part in her business. There’s no way we’re betraying that trust.

"By the way, what happened to the guys originally in the truck, and the guards?"

"The guards exploded with the car. The drivers were thrown onto the road. They look alive, though."

"Good… but damn it! Why did we even take a route that passes through Gehenna Academy’s grounds!? You knew this would happen!"

"B-But the leader said, ‘Gehenna Academy? Ahh it’s fine, it’s fine. Even if there are lots of delinquents, they’re all small fry! And it’s shorter if we go through here, right? We got this!’ so…"

"Don’t make decisions based on that muscle-brain’s logic! Idiot!!! And!? Where is that moron now!?"

"He said he was going to get ramen…"

"F◯CK!!!!!!!"

That stupid idiot…!

"Hey hey, you sure that bike’s not gonna fall apart~?"

"Yo, you’re slow as hell!"

"The rider’s terrified! They’re actually obeying the speed limit!"

"Following the speed limit is basic decency, you bastards!"

Between their jeering, the gunshots raining down on us, and Hibana’s idiotic route choice, even I finally snapped. And I’m famous for being gentle and mild, you know. I DO have limits.

"It’s gonna wobble a bit, so keep driving steady."

"Eh—wait, what!?"

I stood up on the moving bike and aimed my gun. Strong wind blasted me, the bike shook beneath my feet, and bullets zipped past us.

But against my anger, none of that mattered.

"Ugh!?"

"What!? She actually hit—!?"

"No way—"

"Sto—"

Four shots rang out. Each bullet struck a delinquent square in the head, knocking them out instantly. Their bikes toppled and erupted into fiery bursts.

"Alright…!"

"Whoaaa!? I-I’m gonna crash—just sit down already!"

Serves you right!!!

But the enemy wasn’t done yet. The truck’s roof slid open, and another punk rose up—

—holding a menacing, black-shining heavy machine gun.

"Why is that on a delivery truck!?"

"T-The leader said he wanted to… make it flashy…"

"Idiot!!!"

"Eat THIS!!!!"

Bullets sprayed toward us like the gunner was screaming “TAKE THIS—A HUNDRED TIMES OVER!” A torrent of gunfire roared from the machine gun. They were firing straight through the ammunition already loaded into the gun—unless the robbers had politely brought their own bullets, which they absolutely had not.

In other words, they were burning our money.

"Quit wasting it, you idiots!!!"

"Awawawawa!? They’re hitting us, they’re actually hitting us!!"

Bullets ripped apart the asphalt as the barrage continued. At this rate, we’d be turned into swiss cheese—plus, it was such a waste of cash. So—

"Headshot!"

"You really are the best when it comes to sniping."

"What do you mean when it comes to, huh?"

One clean shot to the head. With the gunner knocked out, the machine gun fell silent.

I’ve always been confident in my sniping, ever since my Arius days. Well—back then, it wasn’t so much confidence as sniping being the only thing I could do. But when it comes to shooting, I’ll never lose to anyone in the Helmets Gang.

"Alright! That neutralized it! We’re boarding!"

"N-no, um… I think there’s still…"

"Still what!?"

We’d taken out their guards and neutralized their weapons. All that remained was to storm the truck and beat the robbers senseless—

Or so I thought, right before one of my girls muttered something ominous.

I knew it. People call this kind of thing a “flag.”

"A-ahhh…"

Just as expected.

The flag triggered instantly.

"What… what is this…"

With a deep, heavy mechanical whir, a massive shadow rose, towering high enough to blot out the sun. As if its original form no longer mattered, the truck shed everything unnecessary and stood upright on the earth.

Its gleaming white frame reflected the sunlight as the giant looked down on us.

"Feel the wrath of justice—Gund◯m style!"

"No, that’s supposed to be Transform◯rs!"

"Why is the TRUCK transforming!?"

I was furious. Absolutely, completely enraged.

"I-I saw a button, so I pushed it and then… you know…"

"A-and the leader said, ‘You gotta have some romance in this stuff,’ so…"

"Wasting money…!!!!!!!"

I swore then and there: I would dispose of that foolish, tyrannical idiot someday.

"Isn’t THIS the reason our bike is still a junk heap!?"

"R-r-romance conquers all things!"

"So you’re on that side too!?"

"Fwahahaha!! Tremble before the majesty of Zi◯n’s greatest mechanical terror!"

"You didn’t build it, you moron!!!"

But the situation was hopelessly one-sided. I had no idea how to fight a giant white robot. Tie it up with a rope? Maybe? Except where would I even get a rope? Shoot the pilot? No way. I didn’t even know where the cockpit was.
And what about the cargo? Is it even intact!?

"I’ve got you now!!!"

Countless ideas flashed through my mind like a dying montage, but none were remotely possible. I had no way to break through the situation.

Or so I thought—until it happened.

"Wha—!?"

A violet flash ripped across the sky. It pierced straight through the giant’s chest, carving out a massive hole. The robot that had been towering over us sank to its knees and collapsed.

"W-what just…"

We were saved. I didn’t know how, but we were saved.

Or at least, that’s what I almost thought—until my instincts screamed. Warning me. Telling me to flee immediately.

I understood why soon enough.

"It would help if you stayed still for me."

Gehenna’s strongest force. A living strategic weapon. The incarnation of destruction. Fluffy white mop.

The Prefect Team Chair of Gehenna—Sorasaki Hina.