Chapter 31: Chrysanthemum or Shield

Once the Derby was over, a glorious, training-free period began for me.

On my days off, my dream was to laze around in the trainer’s room all day while Trainer fussed over me. But even though I wasn’t training, they seemed busier than ever.

Apparently, they were being chased around for interviews—TV, radio, newspapers, magazines, even online media. And lately, they’d started asking my opinion on which race I should enter in the autumn.

I thought they were getting ahead of themselves, but since I didn’t want to get forced into some weird, ultra-long race, I picked something at random from the race list and showed it to them. To my surprise, they rejected it even harder than before.

It seemed they really wanted me to run the Kikuka-shō in Kyoto. I think the live song for that one was “Winning the Soul,” right? Do they really like it that much? Well, I did get sent straight to the hospital after the Derby without even getting a chance to dance.

Come to think of it, Stay-senpai ran in that race last year, but… 3000 meters is absurdly long, isn’t it? Who even came up with the idea for such a ridiculously long race?

And going all the way to Kyoto sounds like such a hassle. If possible, I’d rather not go. Actually—if they want me to run the Kikuka-shō so badly, shouldn’t the race lower its head and come to Tokyo Racecourse instead?

What an utterly impolite race.

Sure, if I win the Satsuki-shō, the Derby, and the Kikuka-shō, I’d apparently become a Triple Crown Uma Musume. But wouldn’t any other G1 do just as well? I mean, the Student Council President won seven G1s and is called a Seven-Crown Uma Musume, right?

Besides, having three crowns feels kind of pointless. My head is only one, after all. Well… maybe if I balance them carefully, I could stack three on top.

Though really, even after winning the Derby, I don’t remember getting a crown. Just a towel with the race name on it and some kind of ornament. I get so many things from different races that fitting them all into the trainer’s room is starting to become a serious problem.

I heard you get a shield for winning the Tennō-shō. Are there races where you get a sword, too?

Either way, the Tennō-shō sounds nicer, but I guess I’ll just make a poll on Umatter like last time. If the Tennō-shō wins, I’ll pick that. And if the Kikuka-shō wins… I’ll just pretend I never saw it.

Actually, Trainer told me not to post weird stuff on my current account, so I might have to make a new one. Ugh, such a hassle.

While I was complaining about that, something even more annoying came along.

Apparently, they wanted me to be a guide at an open campus event for the Uma Musume girls who’ll be enrolling next year. From what I heard, King-chan and Spe-chan were also assigned as guides.

Being a guide just meant showing elementary schoolers around Tracen Academy’s facilities and training areas however I liked, so I figured I’d just take them on a tour of good napping spots.

But on the day itself, the combination of elementary schoolers’ infinite stamina and Uma Musume physical ability far surpassed anything I imagined.

I was holding a guide sign behind the reception desk when I was suddenly swallowed whole by a swarm of kids, like ants rushing sugar.

King-chan and Spe-chan were also surrounded, but thanks to the height difference, they were handling their groups with ease. Meanwhile, once I was surrounded, I couldn’t see anything.

Also, where did “Wee-chan” even come from? I mean, sure, my name is a bit hard to pronounce, but still.

And then there were the kids asking impossible questions like:

“I don’t have any amazing talent, but can I still be a main character?”

and shouting things like:

“I’m so moved to meet you!!”

Individuality is great and all, but even I have limits.

I panicked and bolted with the sign, and of course—since they were Uma Musume—every single one of them came charging after me.

They weren’t fast since they were elementary schoolers, but unlike a race, there was no finish line. If anything, they seemed to think this was tag, and the more I ran, the more fired up they became.

Even after I passed the fountain and the pool, they refused to give up. So I gave up instead and ran about half a lap around the training course. By that point, most of the Uma Musume collapsed dramatically onto the ground.

The only ones still standing were a mysterious girl staring into the void, and another girl in a lab coat whose lifeless eyes matched mine.

The mysterious girl was apparently named Cafe-chan. She said that the “friend” only she can see was interested in me, which left me completely unsure how to respond.

She said the friend tended to do things on their own, so I joked:

“If you train them properly, maybe they could become my personal caretaker.”

I immediately got smacked on the head by something invisible.

The girl in the lab coat—Takion-chan—seemed interested in my legs. She started rambling about how I might be able to go beyond the limit of Uma Musume speed. What kind of elementary school curriculum teaches kids to think like this?

I don’t know! And no, I don’t want to run more for your experiments—running is tiring.

I told her:

“You don’t need to rely on your own legs if you want to go that fast.”

And she started seriously agonizing over it.

I don’t know what “limit speed” even is, but if she wants to go that fast, why not just get in a car?

Even though I’d barely run, I was exhausted too, so I took the two girls to the old science room, and we all spent the rest of the time taking a nap.

It seems the other girls who had collapsed on the turf were later collected by King-chan’s group that arrived afterward, and as a result, I ended up getting scolded by Air Groove-senpai.

And so began the biggest battle of the first half of the year: the final exams.

The first to strike was World History. Since horses weren’t available for wars or transport, history had changed quite a bit, and terms related to Uma Musume kept popping up, making it even harder to follow. Of course, that’s mostly an excuse—I hardly remember anything from before my reincarnation anyway.

The second wave came in the form of science subjects. From the inside, quadratic functions and combinatorics attacked, while from the outside, genetics and redox reactions bore down. Could an Uma Musume who doesn’t understand the quadratic formula or half-reactions possibly keep up?

Ah, and from the back, relative adverbs came charging with incredible finishing speed. On top of that, auxiliary verb conjugations were closing in.

The nightmare of the test was about to begin.

Thanks to praying to Shiraoki-sama with Fukukitaru-san and Spe-chan before the exams, I barely managed to submit a few assignments and ended up with make-up sessions in three subjects. That, without a doubt, can be called a great victory.

Even those assignments were survived thanks to the condition that Glasse-chan would run with me in autumn, allowing me to borrow her assistance.

Around the same time as the exams was the Takarazuka Kinen.

The race brought together strong senior-class Uma Musume like Suzuka-san, Stay-senpai, and Air Groove-senpai. In the end, it was Suzuka-san who secured a runaway victory.

Although Suzuka-san won, Stay-senpai—who pushed herself to the very edge and nearly caught the unstoppable runaway Uma Musume, finishing second—seems to have gained quite a bit of respect.

According to the announcer, the last time Suzuka-san won was my debut race, and since then she had finished second six times. If there were a game to predict the second-place finisher in a race, she would be the undisputed top pick.