Chapter 66: Please don't do anything like a cookhouse

I could endure and let slide everything else.

Saying furry is a normal sexual desire, or that Succubus is indeed a super arousing race, I could just dismiss them all as trivial bullshit and move on.

However, I absolutely could not endure the remark that Fox Beastkin is an un-arousing race.

What kind of animal is a fox?

Doesn't it have the most luscious tail among many animals, and isn't it an attractive animal that acts sly and insidious but is surprisingly clumsy?

If such an animal becomes human and seduces with its arousal points, twitching fluffy ears and a luscious soft tail, what kind of person could resist that temptation?

Wouldn't they unconditionally pounce and discipline her so she can't menstruate for 10 months?

But comparing such a fox not to another animal but to a fur-roach (cat) famous for its shitty personality, which would have gone extinct long ago without the advantage of cuteness.

That bastard has no excuse even if beaten until the inside of the frying pan becomes concave.

I swung the frying pan with all my might at my childhood friend laughing unluckily, kik-kik, and could barely calm down only after confirming he was completely pulverized.

"Phew... Raising my blood pressure while I was sleeping soundly, this fucking bastard."

Maybe if I was working on a commission like usual.

Sleeping soundly after a really long time, waking up hearing such fucked up words makes me twice as pissed.

"Really can't kill this bastard either."

Clang!!!!!

Eventually unable to overcome anger, swinging the frying pan at him once more, I held my hungry stomach and walked straight to the kitchen.

Already hungry because I didn't eat breakfast properly, but to make matters worse, got even hungrier from getting angry.

Opened the fridge to eat a meal kit, but meal kits were nowhere to be seen as if eaten sometime, opened the freezer to eat frozen food at least, but the freezer was also empty.

...Fuck, when did I eat all this?

I definitely remember buying enough for 5 days leisurely alone?

Wondering what happened, I checked the trash bag, and the meal kits I bought to eat were all thrown away with the insides completely emptied.

Confirmed there were 10 of different kinds yesterday lunch, so why are they all emptied?

Did someone eat them without me knowing?

Honestly seems a bit too much for that bastard sleeping now to eat alone.

Let's ask first.

Asking might give an answer.

Holding the frying pan convex inside in my hand again, I poked the fainted guy carefully tuk-tuk.

"Hey, fucker. Wake up for a sec."

"Ugh... Why wake me up, bastard. Was just about to bunga-bunga (have sex) with you."

"Stop saying disgusting things, and let me ask one thing. Did you eat all the meal kits in the fridge?"

Must not be.

Surely that bastard didn't eat them all?

Just an intruder who entered the house suddenly found meal kits arousing (appetizing) and ate them all and left.

Denied even a shred of possibility and asked my friend, but the answer from his mouth was more shocking than anything else.

"Meal kits? Ah, you mean those foods packed in plastic?"

"Yeah."

"I cooked and ate them as a 9-dish meal before leaving the house at dawn though? The quantity was better than thought so I ate fully and left."

The friend bastard answering too confidently as if asking what the problem was.

Laughing hollowly at that shameless attitude, I swung the frying pan once again and struck him.

Clang!!!

But perhaps having learning ability, he blocked my frying pan raising his arm, and argued with an angry voice.

"Ah, why are you being a bitch again!"

"Fucker, you ate my 5 days' worth of food in one meal!"

"5 days' worth of food? Don't bullshit me! That's one meal, where does it look like 5 days' worth of food!"

"If divided into breakfast-dinner, lunch-dinner, it was exactly 5 days' worth of food!"

When I screamed sharply ppa-aek like a titmouse threatening, he scratched his shiny head and apologized.

"Sorry, really didn't know it was 5 days' worth of food. Forgive me just once."

"Forgiveness my ass, there's nothing to eat, bastard, all those frozen foods disappeared too so there's nothing to eat! You did the frozen foods too, right?"

"Ah, that? Saw it before, the Fox God manifested and took them out to eat one by one? She ate so deliciously I wanted to eat too."

"Why say that now!"

"Uh... Because the Fox God asked me not to tell?"

Anyway fuck, two bitches and bastards useless in life.

I started taking out ingredients in the fridge one by one grinding my teeth budeuk-budeuk, and my friend watching me looked at me with subtle eyes.

"You, do you know how to cook?"

"Know how to boil ramen."

"No, is there anyone in the world who can't boil that? Asking if you know other dishes besides simple food like ramen."

At his anxious voice, I shook my head lightly and answered confidently.

"No? Never cooked anything except ramen in my life?"

"...A guy who never did anything except ramen, is going to do 'cooking' now?"

"Is there a rule a novice can't do it? If really stuck, just make it watching the internet."

I turned on Ratube and showed him 'Novice can do it too! Easy cooking episode!', and seeing this, my childhood friend laughed hollowly and returned to the bed.

"Yeah, do well on your own. Don't give the food you made to others and make sure to eat alone, understood?"

"Don't ask for it later, bastard."

Just wait.

I'll show you an awesome beef hot pot soon.

[Now, first chop the vegetables into big pieces. If chopped too finely, the texture might not be good later.]

Following the excellent teacher's lecture, chopping vegetables with a Chinese cleaver.

Thud! Thud! Thud! Thud! Thud!

The weak kitchen trembling at each knife cut.

Feeling strong vibrations, my childhood friend opened his eyes slightly and started backseat gaming.

"Aren't you striking down too hard? You might ruin the cutting board doing that?"

"It's okay, Mom said it's an expensive cutting board. Should be fine with most shocks."

"If it's an expensive cutting board, you shouldn't do that even more, you crazy bitch! Cut gently!"

He came to the kitchen and pointed at the traces of the Chinese cleaver remaining here and there on the cutting board, and at this, I made a lukewarm expression and struck him with my tail.

Thud.

Childhood friend making a dumbfounded expression as a thick and luscious tail hit his cheek.

Why, what. Didn't hurt much anyway.

Honestly isn't getting hit by a luscious and fluffy tail a reward?

I struck his opposite cheek with the tail once again, and chased him out of the kitchen.

"I'll take care of it so don't backseat game, if you backseat game one more time, know that you can't touch the tail today. Understood?"

"Hah, do whatever. Whether the cutting board breaks or the kitchen goes to shit, I won't backseat game at all so do whatever."

My friend shook his head as if fed up and returned to the bed, and I started making the hot pot following the teacher's lecture again.

[Now put the largely chopped vegetables in, and let's season it. Please prepare soy sauce, salt, sugar.]

[Hot pot should have some sweetness, right? More sugar the better.]

[Season moderately, and if seasoned, put in meat and complete the hot pot. Very easy, right?]

"Really easy, Teacher. It was a perfect lecture."

But you see.

Why does my hot pot taste like this? I definitely just did as the teacher said.

Definitely, the teacher said salty taste should be felt on a sweet base. Since salty taste on a sweet base suits hot pot better than sweet taste on a salty base.

But why is only salty taste felt in my hot pot?

A powerful salty taste where sweetness is barely felt.

Thinking carefully if there was a mistake during the cooking process? Just added a little more salt because seasoning was a bit off, didn't seem to do anything wrong at all.

Did my taste buds become weird?

No, seeing that baldy bastard ate the meal kits I ate deliciously well too, my taste buds didn't become weird.

Then, it means this beef hot pot is fucking tasteless...

I looked down quietly at the beef hot pot with amazing color, put it carefully in a front bowl, and brought it to my friend.

"Hey."

"What."

"This, try it once. If you eat it all, I'll let you touch the tail for 1 hour."

"Planning to poison your only friend? If I die, I can't touch the tail, you fucker."

The childhood friend freaked out and tried to move away from me, but I wrapped him with my tail and dragged him back in front of me.

"Where are you running."

"Manga spending Happy Time with a dildo, just thinking about it is fucking erotic?"

"Stop bullshitting and just eat, you lewd demon. A bastard whose job is a shaman can only think such vulgar thoughts?"

I handed the hot pot with only good color full of beef to him, and he looked down at the front plate with a questioning face and said.

"Smell is good? Looks delicious too."

"Then try it (Churai)."

"Retard, release the tail so I can try or whatever."

Ah, right.

At my friend's sigh-mixed voice, I released the tail wrapping his body, and as soon as released from the tail, he immediately lifted chopsticks and tasted the hot pot.

And.

"You fuck never cook anything from now on."

Speaking with an infinitely serious voice, he ran straight to the bathroom and started vomiting.

...Was the hot pot that tasteless?

Feeling sorry for no reason.