Chapter 22: Don't Underestimate Me!

Don't Underestimate Me!

I know this is a little late, but what is my, Tachibana Yuri, greatest talent?

Do you think it's my intellect, which has kept me at the top of my grade? No, no, that's a natural consequence of the powerful memories from my past life and the unique talents I was born with in this body.

Then what about my skill in devising a plan to transform my childhood friend into a complete monster? No, no, my plans are pretty rough and sloppy. I'm truly living by the motto "if the end is good, it's good."

If these two obvious things are different, then this question becomes a much more difficult one. So what could it be, I wonder? ♡

"Kyaaah, Kagari-chan is so cool!"

"I know, I know! I'm amazing, you can praise me more!"

The answer is Flattery ♡

I'm not bragging, but it's no exaggeration to say that, ever since I was born, I've been obsessed with currying favor with others.

First of all, of course, it's her! My absolute Oshi, Karen-chan!

Karen-chan's growth into who she is today is the result of my unconditional, total affirmation and strategy of praise, praise, and praise.

I've said things like, "Karen-chan is so cute, I'm jealous," or "Karen-chan is so energetic, just looking at her cheers me up," at least a hundred times a day, for the past ten years. Well, one hundred times 365 times ten, so... that's roughly 365,000 times I've praised Karen-chan. 

I think I did a good job, even if I do say so myself. Even now, I've been praising Karen-chan to this day, even though the only thing left to praise her is her appearance.

And then there are my family, all my relatives, like the other day at New Year's. Every year at the relatives' drinking party, I go around greeting and flattering them while carrying a beer bottle, so I've been pretty well-trained over there.

And if you add in teachers at school and all that, I've probably praised people about 400,000 times in this lifetime alone.

I guess I can call myself the poster child for flattery.

From my perspective, it's not like I can inspire a mere child who is starved for parental love and approval from others.

"Kagari-chan, you're so amazing! You're not only good at studying, but also at sports and art! That's perfect, I admire you!"

"Right, right? I'm actually amazing! I'm top of my class in tests, and I was even nationals in basketball in middle school, and I won gold medals in art competitions all the time!"

"That's insane!"

Wow, you're really coming up with so many lies.

You mentioned studying in your message yesterday, but you also compete in basketball and art competitions. Well, maybe that's not a lie, though. To go nationals in basketball, you first have to win the regional tournament, right?

I sometimes cheer on and support Kikka-chan's club activities, so I kind of know the strong schools around here, and the schools that won that year, but I'm probably not involved at all. I don't even know of any schools that have won around here.

If you're the kind of person who wins awards in art competitions all the time, surely you should have a brush somewhere in your house? And, for someone like you who feels a bit out of place, like, for real, Kagari-san, surely you should have at least one brush in your room. But there aren't many things in this room, let alone a brush.

Well, the truth doesn't really matter. After all, lies are a necessary tool if they help smooth the conversation. Is this like a job interview, explaining why you wanted to work for our company? Eh, my company?

Wow, so you were a part-time leader in school and doubled the store's sales, you were club president and doubled the number of members, and you even studied abroad and got a perfect score on an external English exam.

Please dream only when you sleep.

"So, what other amazing stories do you have?"

"Eh, other?... Ah, yeah, other, other. Wait a minute, there are so many, it'll take me a while to remember them all."

But still, this girl is kind of cute.

If this endless maker of false tales of heroism were just any random old man on the street, I wouldn't even look at him, but if you apply the bias of thinking that he's a cute girl lying to make herself look bigger, he will become kind of cat-like and adorable.

Frankly, this girl is just like Karen. Right now, people are turning to her because she's so cute, but once time wears off the magic of her cuteness, her true colors will come off and people will start to distance themselves from her.

Her current unhealthy appearance makes her seem starved for love, so it fits perfectly. If she were to wear some pink and black gothic lolita clothing, she'd be the ultimate landmine girl. This is just my bias, but she looks like she's drinking pink enamel straws.

"Oh, that's right! I write novels as a hobby, and when I posted them online, they became really popular! I immediately had a ton of publishers asking if they could publish them!"

"Wow, you're such a genius, Kagari-chan, you can even write novels! Where are you going to publish them!?"

"Eh... Ah, yeah! I turned down all the offers, telling them that hobbies are just hobbies, after all! There are some things money can't buy!"

"Wow, Kagari-chan's not only a genius, she's also humble! I admire her!"

"Hehehe... Yes, I'm amazing. Can you praise me more?"

Pat pat, pat pat.

She's so cute, she's the embodiment of the desire for approval and love. She's so cute and so clingy, doesn't she just look like a pet? A hamster, a chinchilla, a Chihuahua? Oh, that last one isn't a rodent? I don't even know if hamsters and chinchillas are really rodents, though. I was just random.

Geez, it takes something to turn a human into a pet. Who was the person who left them alone until they became like livestock like that? I'd like to see their parents' faces.

It's fine after all, I don't need to see them, or rather, I don't want to see her. I hate it when I think about her, that psychopath seems like she'll appear the next second I think about her.

She probably thought she'd be able to chat with me again today as usual, but when I entered Kagari's room without any resistance, she had a very terrible look on her face.

I don't know if Kagari herself saw it, but that was not a nice thing for a parent to look at their daughter like that. She had the look on her face, like someone who had found that thing that starts with C in the kitchen.

I'm using Kagari's Perfect Key now -- which I'll say in my honor, she named it herself -- so there's no way I couldn't get in. In addition to the normal lock, there's also a chair and other things to prevent the door from opening.

I didn't miss it though. After Kagari and I entered the room, the doorknob turned slowly and silently. I almost screamed when I saw it, which was uncharacteristic of me.

Just imagining Kasumi, with an emotionless expression on her face, on the other side of the thin wooden door, slowly turning the knob so as not to let us know, gives me the chills.

Knowing her, she might even be trying to eavesdrop on our conversation by putting her ear to the wall above or next to the room... or is that too much to ask?

I'm trying to be mindful of this and choose my words in a way that wouldn't cause any problems if someone were to ask, but I hope it's just an unnecessary worry.

"You're so great, Kagari-chan is so great. She's greater than anyone, anyone in this world. She can do everything, she's loved by everyone, she's such a happy, amazing girl."

"Yeah, yeah... I see, that's right..."

Without a word, Kagari rests her head on my thigh as I sit. Is this a lap pillow?

She gazes at me longingly. What exactly is she looking for?

I think of a few options in my head, then pick the most likely one and try it out.

I gently place my open right hand on Kagari's head, which is resting on my lap.

"...Hmm♪"

(Oh, thank goodness, it seems I was right.)

As I gently stroke her head, Kagari lets out a comforting moan.

She squirms her head against my palm, rubbing it against my hand, which is quite ticklish. It's just like a kitten clinging to its mother. 

"Good girl, good girl. Kagari-chan is such a good girl... She's such a cute girl."

"Yeah, yeah... Pet me more, Mama."

Mama... huh?

I'm still quite too young to have children.

In yesterday's message, she called me "mother," but I wonder if she really wants to call me "mama." Maybe it makes her seem more dependent and comfortable.

After a while, Kagari-chan began to relax and snore, and I had to wait until she woke up, battling the numbness in my legs.

I was bored, and since the deadline was approaching, I decided to ask her if she wanted to take the school test, but it didn't seem like I'd get a very positive response. She looked sour-faced.

"Ah, well... I mean, it's fine to go outside. A genius like me shouldn't go out... I mean, it's kind of lame to be so hung up about school..."

"Is that so..."

"Ah, don't look so depressed, Yuri-mama..."

No, I wasn't that depressed, or rather, I thought that would happen... Huh?

"What did you just say?"

"Huh? I said, don't look so depressed."

"Afterwards, afterwards."

If I wasn't imagining it, I felt like she'd said something ridiculous... I hope it was just my imagination.

"Afterwards, I say... Yuri-mama?"

"Oh, it wasn't my imagination..."

Please stop. Don't stare at me like that. It makes me look like I'm the weird one.

"What's this Yuri-mama thing?"

"Well, Yuri-mama is Yuri-mama, right? Mama is the one who gave birth to me, and her name is Yuri. So Yuri-mama! A nickname!"

I don't remember giving birth!

I have no memory of being pregnant with her at all!

I don't remember having sex with any man at all!!

Giving birth to a daughter of the same age, so I was pregnant while still a baby!?

Isn't that a pretty gruesome imagination?!

And I'm giving birth less than a year after I'm being born as baby myself?!

"Mama said it was really hard when I was born. The doctor told you that if you gave birth to me, it might be stillborn, but you said you had to give birth to the child you loved! That's what you said, so I know you had a C-section and gave birth to me. I was so happy when I heard that."

"What's that? I don't know anything..."

If a baby comes out of the womb of a supposedly a pregnant baby, then it's obviously stillborn, and the question is, why aren't you dead?

Why am I able to communicate with others when I'm not even a year since my birth?

Please don't put a scalpel in my baby's stomach, you quack doctor.

Hey, don't rub my belly! There's no C-section scar there!

"Yuri-mama and I are blood relatives and we love each other more than anything. I love you, Mama~♡"

What can I say, this has gotten complicated again.

I guess I've taken a step forward too much.

I'm Tachibana Yuri, 1st Year High School Student, 16 years old. I've recently become a mother. My daughter is 15 or 16 years old.

...Huh?