Chapter 15: The Type I’m Worst With. I Wish They’d Just Die.

"Man, I was worried about you three. Getting all the way to Grassport and back without me—guess you got lucky, huh?"

After being persistently pestered by Siegfried—the direct-connection-obsessed knight we had reunited with on the main street—the three of us were now sitting around a table in the tavern on the first floor of the same inn as before.

"Nya—well, I’m glad you’re safe too, nya. Luci… no, wait, Siegnan-something."

"Oh come on, Milk-chan, it’s Siegfried! Just call me Sieg!"

"Don’t call me Milk-chan, nya. Ririka is fine, nya."

"Got it! Understood, Ririka!"

I could have sworn he’d called her an idiot cat-eared girl back in the forest, but Siegfried behaved as if none of that had ever happened, chatting away with shameless familiarity. It was irritating—but I had to admit, I respected that level of mental compartmentalization just a little. Either that, or he genuinely didn’t remember.

"Um… who is this guy? Someone you know…?"

Natsumi whispered that to me, clearly unsettled by Siegfried’s behavior.

"Well, he’s the idiot who jumped in first and turned into a beam of light when you were being attacked by an ogre in the forest. He did try to save you, so you should at least be grateful—just a little."

"Did that really happen…? I thought he just threw something to distract it……"

Apparently, the person who had tried to save him hadn’t even registered as a human being. That was honestly kind of pitiful.

"So, Lu—Sieg, what have you been up to, nya? Are the people you were with new companions, nya?"

"Man, that really hurt back then. I honestly thought I was done for. But I revived at the temple, and while I was thinking about catching up to you guys, Masato-kun from some guild—uh, the Something Guild—said players should cooperate with each other. That sounded good to me, so I joined Marie-san’s party and helped investigate around the city. Like that ogre before, it seems strong monsters have been popping up all over the place lately."

"We know about that too, nya. We met that Masato person earlier, nya."

"Oh, really? Then why don’t you join the guild and help each other out together!"

"Nya… we said we’d cooperate, but we haven’t decided anything that serious yet, nya. There wasn’t anyone we knew among the players in this city either…"

"Come on, Ririka, I’m right here!"

"You were just tagging along on your own, nya. It was a nuisance, nya."

"You’re as cold as ever! How about you, Clarice? And what about the elf lady over there?"

He casually called me by my name as well. The nerve of this hookup-obsessed creep.

"I didn’t know a single person in this game world either. Being told to join a guild out of nowhere doesn’t really sound like something I could get used to."

"I’m strictly solo as well. And please don’t talk to me. You’re the type I’m worst with."

"Now, now, in a situation like this, we’ve all got to help each other."

"Aren’t you the one who said you were going to defeat the Demon King? What about that?"

"Well, it’s not like I’ve given up, but I get what Masato-kun’s saying too—we should secure our footing first. And to beat the Demon King, I’ll need to gather more companions."

He really was the carefree, happy-go-lucky type—or maybe just hopelessly optimistic.

As I was wondering how best to get rid of Siegfried, someone approached and called out to him.

"Sieg, stop wasting time and get ready for the next job. Masato’s orders. We’re investigating magical beasts in the underground catacombs."

"Oh! Marie-san! Sorry, I’ll get ready right away!"

She was one of Siegfried’s party members—a female warrior. A cool-looking beauty with long black hair, dressed in a low-exposure suit of light armor that was rare in this world, with a greatsword strapped to her back. Since player characters could customize their appearances freely, looks alone didn’t mean much, but she was clearly the leader of Siegfried’s new party.

"Nya? Magical beasts—are you talking about the Great Magical Beast, Garmgriff, nya?"

Ririka reacted immediately.

"Yes. If it appears, this city could be put in serious danger. We need to investigate."

"Well then, I’ve got to go! See you later, you three!"

With that, Siegfried and the warrior woman named Marie left the tavern.

He’d said plenty of things that sounded reasonable, but judging by how eagerly he followed after her like a puppy, it was obvious his real target was that female warrior. Truly a shameless hookup addict.

Once they were gone, I turned to Ririka and Natsumi.

"So what exactly is this Great Magical Beast? ‘The city could be in danger’ doesn’t sound good."

"Great Magical Beast Garmgriff. Back when this was still a game, it was a raid boss that appeared periodically, nya."

"I never fought it myself, but… was it strong?"

"It required level 100 or higher just to participate, with up to thirty players, nya. Depending on the group, there were usually around ten hardcore players at about level 200 who just beat it into submission, so it was hard to gauge, nya. But it normally flies around spreading mobs everywhere, and you can only hit it when it comes down, so if it appeared now, it would definitely be troublesome, nya."

"Yeah, that does sound like a pain. Do you know when it appears?"

"In the game, the devs announced it on Twi—uh, social media before it spawned, nya. But that’s probably impossible now, nya…"

"When a game becomes reality, all sorts of systems stop working."

"Seriously, nya. Games are basically a nonstop series of obstacles, nya. Being reincarnated into a game world and steamrolling everything would only be possible with some absurdly convenient cheat or a laughably easy game, nya."

"Please don’t say that. You’re crushing the last hope people have to escape reality."

I understood the feeling. Everyone wanted to sink into a convenient world, at least inside a game. Who could blame someone for throwing a controller in frustration at an unfair difficulty spike?

"That aside, how are they even supposed to investigate something that only appears on a timer? Hanging around the spawn point doesn’t seem helpful."

"If I remember the game’s lore correctly, evil sorcerers who worship an evil god use some kind of sacred treasure to summon it, nya. Maybe they’re looking for those."

"I see. If that’s the case, we might be able to help a little too."

"Ehh… we’re helping those people?"

Natsumi’s face twisted into open disgust. Apparently, cooperation and teamwork were things the person inside this cross-dressing shota elf was fundamentally bad at.

"Natsumi-chan, even so, if this city gets wiped out, that would be a problem for us too, nya."

"I know that, but… I just don’t like that Masato guy."

So that was why the Adventurers’ Guild had felt oddly quiet.

"He totally has that ‘normie’—well, maybe not normie, but ‘net-normie’—vibe, acting like he’s in charge. Those types always start saying things like ‘read the room’ or ‘don’t disrupt the harmony’ and force weird local rules on everyone. He’s exactly the type I hate most. I wish he’d just die."

This cross-dressing shota elf really did have a long list of people he hated.

"I talked with him a bit at the party last night, but he didn’t seem like that kind of guy…"

"Clarice-san, you’re terrible at judging people! You’re a blonde beauty now—you’ve got to be careful! If you keep saying things like that, you’ll get stripped of everything and sold to actual slave traders in no time, you know!?"

"Y-yes, understood. I’ll be careful."

"Well, even if we say we’ll help, we don’t have to act together, nya. If the city ends up in trouble, that would be bad, nya, so Ririka and the others can investigate separately and report back if we find anything, nya."

With Natsumi pressing in on me, Ririka stepped in to throw me a lifeline. In any case, it was better than doing nothing and simply waiting for Masato’s guild to fix the city for us.

After that, while Natsumi—who had especially severe issues communicating with other players—and I—who still hadn’t fully bridged the gap between my appearance and my sense of self—stayed behind at the inn and rented a room, Ririka, who was clearly the most suited for the task, returned to the guild to gather information.

According to what Ririka discovered, the investigation around the city was progressing reasonably well, and the possible locations where a mage summoning magical beasts might be hiding had been narrowed down to just two. One was the underground catacombs beneath the city, and the other was a ruin-like dungeon to the west. Since Siegfried and Marie’s party were already handling the catacombs, Ririka took responsibility for surveying the other site—the ruins.

The next morning, as we prepared to depart for the ruins, I geared up as usual: my electromagnetic shield suit with a poncho thrown over it, the transforming assault rifle and handgun I had restocked after the trouble in Grassport, several types of grenades, and, finally, a bag of snacks. They were mostly biscuits rather than proper rations—purchased in town by Ririka and unceremoniously handed off to me. With that, we were ready to go.

"It’s a small dungeon that was often used for leveling beginners back in the day, nya. I think the three of us will be fine, but should we call Erika-nyan just in case, nya?"

"Yeah. Since it’s underground, aerial support wouldn’t help much in an emergency anyway. Having her along would be reassuring."

While talking like that and walking down the main road toward the city gate, we noticed someone waiting for us there.

A slut.

No—standing before us was Her Highness Evangelin, the princess knight of this country, clad in what could only be described as extremely minimal armor. It technically counted as clothing, but only just, exposing far more skin than any reasonable set of armor should. The result was… certainly eye-catching.

"Ririka-dono! I have heard of your mission! You head to investigate the ruins in order to strike down an evil god-worshiping mage, yes? This is a fine opportunity to repay the debt I owe you from Dora Fortress and Grassport! And if it is for the peace of my people, then I, Evangelin, will gladly lend my strength!"

Even if it was already too late for her personal sense of modesty, didn’t the people of this country have any thoughts about their princess wandering around dressed like that? The nearby gate guards stood rigidly at attention, tense but professional, so perhaps they had already become desensitized.

To be blunt, she would only get in the way if I needed to call Erika or make full use of my weapons. But there was no realistic way to turn down a princess who had shown up this enthusiastically. And so, the four of us—Ririka, Natsumi, Evangelin the princess knight, and myself—set off together to investigate the ruins.

Given the circumstances, combat inside the dungeon would have to be left to Ririka and Natsumi. I resigned myself to the role of support—specifically, the one carrying the biscuits.

As we left the city behind, Evangelin began speaking. Princess or not, it seemed chatting came naturally to her.

"Still, Ririka-dono, to think you would already be working for the sake of others after everything that happened… it is admirable. Even if you rested for a while, none would complain."

"Nya, well, there’s no point just loafing around the city, nya. Plenty of people are handling things there already, and it doesn’t look like there’s much we can help with, nya. A small group is more relaxing anyway, nya."

Natsumi nodded along.

"Exactly. I’m already sick of how many players are packed into the city. If we’re going to be in this world long-term, I might as well live quietly in the forest like a proper elf."

"If you stay in the forest, you might just get attacked by another monster you can’t handle, nya. Better not, nya."

"Ah, but elves live a long time, right? If I just keep killing low-level monsters, wouldn’t I eventually hit the level cap and end up absurdly strong without noticing?"

"There is a level cap, so that won’t work, nya. And even if there wasn’t, that’s an unbelievably long-term plan, nya. Killing nothing but weak monsters every day for hundreds of years isn’t something a sane person could do, nya."

"We’re not really the slow-life-in-the-countryside type anyway."

"Heh. Just like at Dora Fortress—you normally speak that way, do you not, Clarice?"

Crap. I’d forgotten the princess knight was with us and let my guard down.

"S-she grew up in a remote region and was a slave, so her speech is a bit rough, nya."

"Y-yes, well… something like that. Probably."

"Pay it no mind. For now, I am also a member of what you adventurers call a party. You may speak as you wish."

"Ah, well… thank you very much."

"However, do be careful when you stand before my brother. It seems he has taken quite a liking to you."

"That’s, um… I’ll do my best."

As grateful as I was for the princess knight’s generosity, I very much wanted to avoid meeting her brother if at all possible.

After chatting like that for about an hour without encountering any monsters, we arrived at the entrance to the ruins, nestled among a stretch of low hills.

Having a dungeon entrance so close to the city felt questionable, but placing beginner-friendly dungeons too far away wouldn’t have worked well back when this was still a game. It was probably just another leftover from those days.

"Alright, let’s go, nya. Let’s get this over with quickly and earn some goodwill with that guild master Masato, nya."

A cat-eared, cat-tailed girl in a pink maid outfit that prioritized style over practicality. A cross-dressing elf in a tight white one-piece outfit that left little room for movement. A princess knight wearing armor that barely qualified as such. And finally, me—wrapped in a black full-body suit and poncho, a blonde beauty who stood out no less than the rest.

No matter how you looked at it, this group was dressed nothing like proper ruin explorers.

And yet, without hesitation, the four of us stepped into the dungeon that lay within the ruins all the same.