Chapter 46: My Broken-Hearted Childhood Friend, Bittersweet

My Broken-Hearted Childhood Friend, Bittersweet

["I've got your secret. If you don't want me to tell anyone, let's go home together after school today?"]

I received a message like that, roughly translated, just as the height of summer was over and the weather was starting to cool down.

I thought, "Who's the one to send such a threatening message?", but it turned out to be the same old Tomohiro-kun.

Of course, Tomohiro-kun isn't everywhere, but since he controls both my two biggest areas of activity, school and home, I have a high chance of encountering him, so it feels like he's everywhere.

...Why don't you expand your range of activities? Is life fun like that?

Suddenly, these words that seem to deny life hit me, and I couldn't help but feel sad and cry. It's fun. Life is fun. Teasing Tomohiro-kun, doting on Mama, making Satoshi-kun let his guard down. I'm enjoying my life in my own way.

...I guess it's rare for a life where living happily to have such a negative impact on others. If that's the case, wouldn't it have been better not to enjoy it? 

Unable to console himself like usual, I reply to Tomohiro-kun with tears streaming down my face and makes a promise to go home together.

By the way, the message I actually receive from Tomohiro-kun is a perfectly reasonable one:

["I've found out the secret Hikari-chan told me about a long time ago. Can I go over it with you after school?"]

There's nothing threatening or coercive about anything.

...Both Satoshi-kun and Tomohiro-kun behave too well when they know a secret. They need to act more like scumbags or they'll lose their charm.

While reflecting on myself for not expecting charm from knowing a secret, I wipe away the tears that won't stop with a handkerchief.

Usually, I comfort them right away, so these tears aren't a problem, but if I leave them alone, they last this long.

Oh, come on, it's a pain, so just stop crying, Hikari!

Forcing myself to hold back my tears made me stop, and I killed some time until after school.

Up until now, I'd regularly flirt with Tomohiro-kun and Shota-kun, but if I were to narrow my target down, that kind of move wouldn't be such a good idea.

Though we haven't clearly put it into words yet, Satoshi-kun and I are already close to being romantically involved.

Knowing this, I'm sure Tomohiro-kun is expecting something when he sends me a message like this, even though we haven't had much chance to talk recently.

If Tomohiro-kun could show me a more radiant side than Satoshi-kun, my expectations would be fulfilled, I thought, showing my exasperation in a way that was quite unreasonable for Tomohiro-kun, and left the classroom as homeroom ended.

Even though we were going home together, it would feel more natural if we met up before. The atmosphere is important, isn't it?

Pretending not to notice Satoshi-kun, who had apparently come to pick me up after homeroom, I headed to the meeting place, which turned out to be the same back of the school building as when Satoshi-kun had found out about my secret before.

I'd chosen this place, and it was intentional. This time, he wasn't peeking, I'd see his face. 

I use a hand mirror to check that my clothes are in order, and since they seem fine, I wait a bit. Since I left the classroom earlier than anyone else, it's not surprising that I will be waiting for Tomohiro-kun, and that the boy will arrive after me.

...Considering when I left the classroom, Satoshi-kun is coming to pick me up really early. I wonder if there's no one to chat with him in the classroom?

No, there isn't? Haha, he's a loner.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, Hikari-chan."

As I wait, thinking about the sad reality of Satoshi-kun's status as the top candidate for sparkle, Tomohiro-kun arrives a few minutes after me.

He hadn't finished cleaning up by the end of homeroom, so a slight delay is within the realm of acceptability. Otherwise, I'd take my time.

I tell him I don't wait that long, and then I pose the question, "What's my secret?"

It's better to check the answer quickly. I hate it when they drag out the answer for TV or other special effects. 

"Hikari-chan's secret, this Hikari account, right? Considering that Miho-san calls it that, and considering Hikari-chan's name and the lumber store we went to the other day, I thought it might be it."

As for the account name, it was taken from the name of my previous stage career, so the name doesn't really matter. But the answer was correct, and the steps were almost correct too. I feel like there were a few too many hints needed, but it's only strange that Satoshi-kun was able to reach the answer without any hints at all. Tomohiro-kun also passed with a passing grade.

"Yes, that's right. Then it's time for the promised reward. Is there anything you want, Hiro-chan?"

I told him I'd make something if I could, and if something ready-made was fine, I'd buy him something small as hush money.

Tomohiro-kun thought for a moment, then asked for the same thing I'd given the others to keep quiet.

For now, the only people who know my secret are my family, Satoshi-kun, and Miho-san. I've prepared and given them both pieces of art, so I thought I'd make something for Tomohiro-kun too.

...Eh, Miho-san? It was all because I threatened her, and when we looked into it, she turned out to be a reincarnated person, to be precise, my ex-wife. That was an exception.

For Satoshi-kun, I made a wooden severed head glasses stand, so I thought it would be fine to make something similar for Tomohiro-kun, and I randomly decided what to make, choosing the wood I'd use for it. I might as well make something heavy and substantial.

"And that's not all. There's something I've always wanted to tell you, Hikari-chan... I like you."

Which tree should I make Tomohiro-kun out of?

While I was thinking about such trivial things, Tomohiro-kun, who seemed to have made up his mind, suddenly confessed his feelings to me.

It was a situation without a trace of romance, but I didn't find his straightforward and honest words to be bad. I'm sure most girls out there would rather not have it, but I like it. Just be careful when you do it to other girls.

So, how would a normal girl react when confessed to by a childhood friend who's been like family to her?

Would she burst into tears and say, "I'm so happy! I like you too!"?

Or would she hurt his self-esteem as a boy and say, "I'm sorry, I've never seen you that way"?

Both are natural, and quite fine.

To be honest, if it weren't for Tomohiro-kun, whom I'd raised to this point, I would have liked to have tried this at least once. But, for better or worse, it was Tomohiro-kun before me, and it was already too late for the former, and I had expressed my feelings too much for the latter.

I'm unhappy that I can't do something I've always wanted to try.

"...I wish I'd heard those words sooner. You're too late, Hiro-chan."

I had already decided to bet everything on Satoshi-kun.

If it had been Shota-kun & Little Sister's route, I would have been free, so I wouldn't have minded playing around with Tomohiro-kun, but it was too late now.

I shed tears for Tomohiro-kun, acting like a girl who, after being completely defiled by someone she hates, finds out that her first love and her are in love with each other.

I'm a talented actress, so I can cry whenever I want to. I'm a genius beauty who can cry in three seconds. I do have a problem, though, where I cry even when I don't want to. It's a horrible defect, but it makes me cry.

The truth is, if Tomohiro-kun had shown me his manliness before I decided on Satoshi-kun, I might have been able to fall for him, but then I remember that it was Tomohiro-kun who was putting up guard against me, even though I had openly expressed my feelings for him since we were little.

What a terrible story. Poor Tomohiro-kun.

"...I see, that's true. I kind of had a feeling that was the case. Sorry for saying something weird. I don't mean to get in the way of Hikari-chan, so I'd appreciate it if you didn't mind it too much."

Tomohiro-kun turned his face away, looking as if he was about to cry, as he apologized.

He probably looked awful and didn't want me to see it. A boy wants to look his best, even in front of someone who he's shown so many pathetic sides already. I have enough of a heart to understand that, so I'll leave him alone for now.

I apologized to Tomohiro-kun once more and left the place. It was never my intention to hurt Snack-kun, the one I'd cherished and raised, like this. 

"...Poor thing, you made him cry. Wasn't there another way?"

As I was about to leave the back of the school building, Miho-san, who was out of Tomohiro-kun's sight, called out to me.

Prying into someone else's love life is not really a good hobby, you know.

"...Shut up, you're the one pushing me like that."

"If Hikari says so, that's fine," Miho-san said, sounding as if she had some thoughts. She continued, "I'll comfort him, so you should do something about your tears."

This is the kind of thing that makes it difficult to deal with someone who knows about reincarnation, my only advantage for a long time.

I left Tomohiro-kun in Miho-san's charge, and threw myself into woodworking to sublimate the somewhat complicated emotions inside me. 

The piece I'd created with unprecedented concentration was so good that I wanted to burn it.