Chapter 14: There’s no turning back
Chapter 14: There’s no turning back
> Chapter 15: Sleepover (Part 1)Time flies, and before I knew it, spring break had arrived. My first year of high school had passed in the blink of an eye. Thinking about how quickly the next two years would follow sent a shiver down my spine.
Maybe this so-called “moratorium” of youth wasn’t as long as I’d imagined.
If things kept moving at this pace, I’d graduate, go to college, get a job, and…
Whenever I pictured that future, Sumire was always there. As if it was the most natural thing in the world.
I guess I’ve been pretty poisoned by her presence.
But Sumire’s smart. She’ll probably go to some prestigious university far beyond my reach. And there, she’ll meet someone better—someone who can keep up with her, challenge her, stand beside her.
…I hate that.
I want to go to the same university as Sumire. And if possible…
No. It’s wrong to base my future on something so selfish. I know that. But right now, it’s the only thing I wish for.
If I want a shot, I need to study. Hard. If I can reach the level of the University of Tokyo, I’ll have the flexibility to go anywhere.
…Is it weird for a first-year to be thinking this way? It’s about time to start considering the future, sure, but my priorities feel skewed.
Maybe I’ve been warped by Sumire since kindergarten.
Spring break has left me with too much free time, and with it, these strange, nagging thoughts.
…I wonder what Sumire’s doing right now.
Just as I was thinking about her—speak of the devil.
Sumire sent me a message on LINE.
I’m at your gate. Open up.
Seriously? She could at least give me a little warning before showing up unannounced. Then again, this happens so often that I’ve long since given up complaining.
Sorry, I’m out with friends right now.
Liar. You don’t have any friends, Ren.
"What did you just say, you—?"
I sighed, tossing my phone onto the bed before dragging myself downstairs.
For some reason, she knew I was home. How? Peeking through the peephole, I saw Sumire standing outside, waiting patiently.
Resigned, I unlocked the door and left it open, heading straight back to my room without another word.
A little while later, I heard soft footsteps on the stairs. Then—
Thump.
Sumire plopped down onto my bed, landing right on top of me.
“Hey—what are you doing?” I sputtered, stiffening under the unexpected weight.
“Shut up,” she muttered, completely ignoring me.
Her chest pressed against my stomach—not great. Worse, her breath tickled my side through the loose gap in her shirt, sending an involuntary shiver up my spine.
I swallowed hard. “Isn’t that position uncomfortable?”
She idly scrolled through her phone, barely acknowledging my question.
“Not at all. Unlike you, I’m flexible.”
“Well, okay.”
“……………………Pervert.”
Isn’t that a bit unfair?
Still, I noticed I wasn’t as flustered by this level of contact as I used to be. Progress? My lower half was barely holding on, though.
Lately, things had been getting... pretty intense. Maybe I’d built up some tolerance. Whether that was a good thing or not, I had no idea. But as long as Sumire seemed happy, I guess it was fine.
For a while, I just watched her as she idly scrolled through her phone. She didn’t glance at me once, completely absorbed in whatever she was doing.
Then, after five—maybe ten—minutes of silence, she finally spoke.
“Hey.”
“What?”
“...Never mind.”
Just when I thought she was going to say something meaningful, she backed out.
This pattern repeated.
Two times.
Three times.
By the fourth, I was genuinely curious. What was she doing? I tried peeking at her phone, but from this angle, all I could make out was the faint glow of the screen.
“So? What are you doing?” I asked.
“Using LINE.”
She answered, but that was it. Silence again.
At this point, her weight on my stomach was starting to get uncomfortable. Honestly, I wanted her to move, but seeing no sign of that happening, I gave up and opened a game on my phone instead.
Then—
“Hey… Ren.”
Her voice was quieter this time.
I paused, sensing something different in her tone.
“What is it?”
Just as the game finished loading, Sumire spoke up again.
“Remember… we had that sleepover on Christmas?”
“Oh yeah, I guess we did.”
“Yeah, it was really fun.”
She put her phone down and buried her face in my side. I couldn’t see her expression, but something about her tone felt… off. Softer than usual.
“I’ve always dreamed of having a sleepover with friends. I was really happy.”
“…Yeah, I had fun too.”
“But, you know…” Her voice dipped slightly. “I’ve always been the one going to sleepovers, but… I’ve never had friends over at my place before.”
I could see exactly where this was going.
“Hey, I can see exactly where this is going. I’m definitely not going.”
“Eh? Why not?”
She immediately protested, slapping my leg repeatedly. It didn’t hurt at all, but the way she squirmed on my stomach was incredibly ticklish.
“Listen, I might as well say it now. At our age, it’s not normal for a guy to sleep over at a girl’s house, you know?”
“But it’s not normal anyway.”
“…Yeah, it’s not normal… huh?”
Wait.
Something wasn’t right.
Before I could process it, Sumire suddenly lifted her head, her eyes sharp with mischief. Then, ever so slowly, she leaned in closer, looming over me like a cat cornering its prey.
And then—she grabbed my chin.
What’s known as a chin lift.
Wait… isn’t this supposed to be the other way around?!
Her face was so close that my entire field of vision was filled with Sumire. Her long lashes cast delicate shadows, and despite the situation, I couldn’t help but think—she looked almost doll-like.
Her hair fell around us like a curtain, cutting me off from the outside world. The only thing that existed in this moment was her piercing gaze, locking me in place. There was something almost serpentine about her allure—silent, patient, inescapable.
“You’re really dense, aren’t you?” Her voice was barely above a whisper. “Are you trying to imitate a light novel protagonist or something? Or have you just been overthinking things too much? I won’t say what, though.”
The closeness, the way her breath ghosted against my skin—my mind blanked. I couldn’t come up with a response. I never expected her to suddenly act like this.
She seemed genuinely… upset. Her gaze was steady, unwavering, as if she were silently daring me to figure it out. Did I say something wrong? Was it because I talked back so cheekily…?
“I might as well say it too.” Her fingers curled slightly on the sheets. “I’m not an idiot. I understand what it means to invite someone over.”
“……!! What are you saying…?”
At this distance, where our breaths mingled, I couldn’t meet her eyes anymore. I instinctively looked away, heart pounding in my ears.
“I have something important… to talk about……………… So, please.”
Why does it have to be after staying over? Why can’t we talk about it now? The words hovered on the edge of my lips, but I couldn’t bring myself to say them.
Before I knew it, I had nodded.
Sumire watched me for a moment, then slowly pulled away, turning her back to me. She picked up her bag without a word.
Just before stepping out of my room, she finally spoke again.
“This weekend… I’m planning to stay over at my grandma’s house. You should come too, Ren.”
For a moment, my brain short-circuited.
“…Huh?”
It took me a second to process her words. But even after they sank in, I was even more confused. What on earth was she talking about?
“Wait, wait, wait. That’s a completely different story. That’s definitely not okay.”
“Shut up, no backtalk.”
“No, seriously, that’s an even bigger deal than staying at a girl’s house!”
“Well, that’s how it is.” She waved a hand dismissively, already halfway out the door. “I’ll call you later to talk about it. Bye-bye.”
“Hey, wait!!”
But she was gone. She didn’t even glance back, leaving me alone with my spiraling thoughts.
What just happened? How did we go from talking about my first sleepover to… visiting someone’s grandparents? That’s not just a small step—it’s a giant leap into unknown territory.
Tagging along on someone else’s family trip… That’s definitely not normal.
Maybe this has something to do with what she mentioned earlier—the “something important” she wanted to talk about.
A strange unease settled in my chest.
“Dense,” “something important,” “what it means to invite someone over.”
Her words kept replaying in my head. What was she trying to say? I’m not that dense… am I?
But the possibility flickering in the back of my mind was one I wasn’t ready to face. It was too sudden. Too much.
Sigh…
Why does she always have to mess with my heart like this?
Even now, the scent of her lingered—the faint trace of shampoo from when she leaned over me, her warmth still fresh in my memory. That bewitching Sumire wouldn’t leave my head.
I burrowed under the blankets, desperate for distraction.
I rushed out of Ren’s house, pressing a hand to my chest. My heart was pounding so hard it felt like it might burst.
With trembling fingers, I fumbled for my phone and managed to open L○NE. My hands shook so much that I had to rewrite my message several times before finally sending it.
“I did it, Kanna-chan!!”
The chat was already filled with her messages of encouragement: “You’ll be fine, Sumire!” “Just go for it!” “Believe in yourself!”
I ended up blurting out things I hadn’t planned to say… but I managed to take that first step. And it was all thanks to Kanna-chan.
Momentum really is important. Honestly, I was beyond frustrated with how dense he was—especially after everything I’ve tried lately.
Letting that frustration push me to spill everything at once… Was that the right choice? Maybe. But it has to be better than saying nothing at all. It has to be.
Now, regret is creeping into my chest. But that would be too disrespectful to everyone who’s been supporting me. I have no choice but to move forward.
It might sound dramatic, but I’ve been holding onto this since kindergarten.
For me, this is everything.
I rushed into the house and headed straight for my mom.
“Oh, you’re back already?”
“Yeah! I told him.”
I had already explained a bit about the situation and my plans to both my mom and grandma. I didn’t go into too much detail, but they were happy to help, smiling and saying, “Oh, how youthful!” I felt a little guilty for dragging them into such a selfish request.
According to Kanna-chan, this was the “involve as many people as possible to eliminate your escape routes” strategy.
It’s not like I’m doing anything grand, but I am causing a bit of trouble for Grandma. Still, she just smiled gently and said, “It’s my granddaughter’s first big request, after all.”
Since this isn’t the kind of thing Ren and I can decide on our own, I made sure to get permission from everyone. Ren’s dad gave the okay, and after some reluctance, my own dad eventually agreed too.
I spent the evening helping my mom with chores and studying. She’s a columnist and usually works from home, so we often end up working side by side.
When night fell, I called Ren to explain the details. He resisted at first—of course—but after a bit of back and forth, he finally gave in.
Now, all that’s left is for me to muster my courage and do my best.
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