Chapter 23: Race

Even as the world's most notorious and powerful pirate crew, we weren't so indiscriminate as to raid every island in our path.

Sure, our crew was full of vicious bastards. Killing each other was practically a pastime. There wasn’t a single port we'd docked at where we hadn't left bodies in our wake—that’s just the kind of lawless scum we were.

But large-scale destruction of towns and islands usually only happened under direct orders from the captain. Otherwise, the crew would just… stroll through town like normal people.

Especially on islands outside the World Government’s jurisdiction—there was no need to attack them. In fact, it was often better not to. The captain would tell us to behave ourselves unless provoked.

So in those places, we’d resupply through trade, buy weapons, shop around, even eat at restaurants like regular folks.

Hell, if the captain was in the mood, we might even engage in a little… recreation.

And of course, it was never just a game—

It was a pirates’ game.

"...Then—we swear by the three laws of defeat in… DAVY BACK FIGHT!!!"

That’s right—it began with two gunshots fired simultaneously by the opposing captains…

A game where pirates stole each other’s crewmates.

"First!! 'All crewmates, flags, and possessions lost in Davy Back Fight can only be reclaimed through Davy Back Fight!' Second!! 'Those chosen and handed over to the victor must swear immediate loyalty to the enemy captain!' Third!! 'A stolen flag may never be raised again!' —Those who break these laws shall be branded pirates’ shame and offered to Davy Jones’ Locker!! Do you swear to abide by this!?'"

"WE SWEAR!!"

"Gihahaha… We swear."

Then, the enemy captain tossed a handful of coins into the sea—a declaration to the deep-sea pirate, Davy Jones—and the game began.

For pirates, refusing this challenge was unthinkable. As for why we, the Rocks Pirates, were playing this game with a New World crew?

Simple—we’d been challenged.

Captain Rocks wasn’t the type to pick fights with every pirate we met on non-affiliated islands. Sometimes, he’d even ignore them entirely. Sure, he’d usually ask if they wanted to join the crew… but this time, they’d challenged us to a game.

Probably because they thought they could win and recruit one of Rocks’ infamous pirates for themselves. And honestly? Once something was lost in Davy Back Fight, the only way to get it back was through another Davy Back Fight—no tricks, no takebacks.

Unlike a straight-up brawl, this was a game, so they might’ve thought they had a shot.

…But realistically? The outcome was obvious.

For me, the fun was elsewhere.

"Ughhh, they actually went for it. Like they had a chance. Guess we’re getting some newbies."

"Fools… Boss should’ve just killed ’em before acceptin’."

"Nah, Captain kinda likes this game, y’know? Not that I hate it either. Gets me front-row seats to a beatdown with snacks. And I love festivals—hey, gimme some yakisoba, takoyaki, and yakitori!!"

"Worororo, not bad with a drink in hand."

So Kaido and I grabbed food and booze from the stalls, settling in to watch the enemy pirates suffer.

By the way, these food stalls were practically tradition—an unspoken rule of pirate games. These little details mattered. No way we’d watch sober. Plus, festival food just tasted better during stuff like this.

As we waited for the game to start, munching away, a certain giant plopped down nearby.

So I decided to punch him.

"Heyyyy~ ♡ You drinkin’~?"

"Don’t sucker-punch a man mid-swig, brat!!"

"Aww."

I’d aimed for the back of Whitebeard’s head, but he dodged effortlessly and scolded me. Same as always. Couldn’t he just let me hit him once?

"Ugh, you’re so boring, Whitebeard~! It’s a party! Would it kill you to let me stab you a little?"

"The hell kinda logic is that, idiot…? Sit the hell down. I ain’t lettin’ you start fights between crewmates here."

"I know, geez. You know I’m just messing around, right? …Hiyah!"

"—Oi! The hell’re you—?!"

Seizing my chance, I swiped a skewer of yakitori from Whitebeard’s plate and stuffed it in my mouth. He immediately grabbed me by the collar and lifted me up, but I kept chewing.

"Mmph, nom… mm~ ♡ So good! Thanks for the meal~!"

"You damn brat…!! Can’t drop your guard for a second around you…!!"

My attack missed, but the theft was a success. Whitebeard gritted his teeth, so I made sure to gloat. Heh. Outsmarting him felt great.

And the taste of victory—well, that yakitori was extra delicious.

"Ah, looks like it's about to start?"

"...Yeah, right—NOW!!"

"Whoa!?"

Just as I noticed the first event of the Davy Back Fight—the "Donut Race"—was about to begin, with two barrel-made ships floating at the starting line in the harbor, Whitebeard timed his punch to the starting signal—and unleashed a "Quake" on the open air.

In that instant, the Rocks Pirates' ship was sent flying into the sky.

"Wha—!? The sea’s rising!?"

"Forget that—their ship’s floating! What the hell’s happening!?"

The enemy pirates gaped at the absurd sight, especially at the man now looking down on them from the airborne vessel.

"Zehahaha... Interference’s fair game in pirate contests… but damn, Whitebeard, that’s nasty. If I wasn’t here, both ships would’ve sunk."

That’s right—the ship was floating thanks to "Golden Lion" Shiki and his Float-Float Fruit powers.

And to make it worse, Whitebeard’s quake had just triggered a tsunami barreling toward the harbor.

"A t-tidal wave!?"

"How the hell do we dodge th—GWAHHH!!?"

—And just like that, it was over. The enemy ship capsized, ending the race in seconds. Technically, the goal was to reach the finish line first… but sinking the opponent’s ship also counted as a win.

Still, this combo was brutal. Floating the ship already made victory impossible for the enemy, but adding Whitebeard’s quakes? No contest. They even had a fishman—normally a huge advantage in sea races—but it didn’t matter.

"Gihaha… Hey now, think about the venue."

As the tsunami threatened to swamp the harbor, Captain Rocks drew his sword—then slashed horizontally, splitting the wave and repelling it with sheer force.

…Yep. Still the biggest monster here. Dude’s not even a Devil Fruit user.

"Kinda figured, but this isn’t even a game at this point."

"Tch. Should’ve ended this boring shit fast. Stealing crewmates through games…"

Huh. Whitebeard was grumbling into his drink. Guess even he, who treasured his crew, hated this game.

Me? I didn’t mind. Festive atmosphere, legal bullying—it tickled my sadistic side.

"Hey, Kaido. Think we could use this game later? For recruiting?"

"Hah? —Pointless. Faster to just crush ’em and drag ’em aboard."

"Boo~ Could’ve been handy for stubborn ones. Oh well."

I shrugged, not really disappointed. Kaido clearly wasn’t a fan either.

"...You two plannin’ to go independent?"

"THE HELL’S IT TO YOU, WHITEBEARD!?"

"Ah… well, maybe? We’re almost adults—can’t blame us for wanting our own crew soon, right?"

Whitebeard’s casual question made Kaido snap, but I played coy. Independence was coming, but the timing was fuzzy.

Yet Whitebeard ignored Kaido, giving me a weird look.

"...Adults? Wait, you… You haven’t grown at all. You look the same as when we first met."

"RUDE!! I have grown!! It’s been five years—of course I have!!"

"Damn right!! Don’t mock Nüe!! She carves her height into the ship’s walls every damn day!! Progress is slow, but it’s there!!"

"SHUT UUUUP, IDIOT!!"

"GYAH!?"

I smacked Kaido with my trident for exposing my secret habit. My face burned. I didn’t want anyone knowing I still did something so childish!!

"...Pfft—GURARARA!! That’s what’s buggin’ you, Nüe? Bratty as ever."

"I-It’s not!! I’m cute either way, so who cares!? And stop calling me a brat!!"

"Throwing a tantrum proves you’re a brat."

"SHUT UP!! DIE!! And FYI, youth is justice!! Stay jealous of my eternal freshness!!"

"Oi!! WHITEBEARD!! I’ll kill you for this—mark my words!!"

"Tch. I ain’t aging or dyin’, dumbass. Especially not to you clowns. GURARARA!"

Grr. That smug… But for now, I could only grit my teeth. No way I could beat him yet.

But in 10, 20, 30 years? Who knows.

I’d catch up somehow. Kaido might do most of the work, but I wouldn’t just sit quietly.

One day… I’d shock them all.

"…Hm? Looks like the captain just picked someone from their crew."

"Wait, what? I missed it! Who? What’re they like?"

"Didn’t catch the name, but… it’s a Longarm tribesman. Never seen ’em before, but if the captain chose ’em, they’ve gotta be decent."

"—Good. I’ll go ‘welcome’ ’em by killing ’em."

"Idiot, Kaido. That’s not a welcome—it’s a funeral. At least pretend to behave. …Though I am curious. Never seen a Longarm up close…"

While Whitebeard and I bickered, Captain Rocks had claimed one of the enemy pirates after the first round. According to Whitebeard, it was a Longarm tribesman—someone the captain deemed worthy, so they had to be strong. Not that I’d pull a Kaido and try to murder them on sight, but I was curious.

As I mulled over our new crewmate, Whitebeard—ever the encyclopedia—chimed in unprompted:

"Longarms are native to the Grand Line. They’ve been feuding with the Longlegs for ages—full-blown wars, even."

"Ooh, you’re knowledgeable."

"Comes with sailing so long."

He took a swig of booze, utterly nonchalant about dropping lore. Perfect. If he was in a sharing mood, I might as well dig deeper.

"What other rare races are out there?"

"Rare ones? Well, you know fish-men, merfolk, giants… but there’s also the tiny Tontatta, snake-necked tribes, and even beast-like humanoids. Haven’t seen ’em myself, though."

Interesting. Longarms, Longlegs, fish-men with their messy history, merfolk, giants from Elbaf, the adorably strong Tontatta… and the last one had to be the Minks.

But I wanted rarer tales.

"That’s cool, but—anything weirder? Like, ultra-rare species!"

"Since when’re you so curious, Linlin? Got a thing for exotic types?"

"Duh! The unknown’s exciting!!"

I leaned in, eyes sparkling. Whether I’d forgotten or never knew didn’t matter—I wanted stories.

Whitebeard sighed but humored me after a beat.

"Heard rumors… three-eyed tribes, winged folk who breathe fire. No clue if they’re real."

"!! That all sounds awesome!"

"Guess so. Worth seein’, if they exist."

"Right!? Imagine putting eyedrops in a third eye or dousing a fire-breather with water!!"

"…The first one’s whatever, but don’t waterboard people."

He side-eyed me, but my curiosity raged. Non-humans with bizarre traits? The urge to experiment was irresistible.

Besides, someday, Kaido and I would build the strongest Beast Pirates. Why not recruit freaks who looked like literal monsters? A true menagerie of beasts.

"Kaido, thoughts? Exotic races sound fun and strong, right?"

"If they’re strong, hell yeah!! …Wait, what happens if a fish-man Devil Fruit user drowns? They just die?"

"Wanna find out?"

"For fuck’s sake, don’t—"

Whitebeard cut in, exasperated. Fine, fine—drowning allies was a waste. Enemies, though? …Nah, still too boring.

—Oh. Speaking of rare races…

There was someone who’d know more.

Too bad I can’t ask directly.

"Hmm…"

"? What’re you looking around for?"

"Looking for someone. Wonder if they’re here… Probably not— Oh, found ‘em!"

With that, I glance around casually, searching for my target. Honestly, I didn’t expect them to be here—figured they’d be busy watching kids on the ship—but surprise, surprise! I immediately send out a UFO to snatch them up.

"Whoa!? The hell!?"

"Yahoo~ Katakuri~! How ‘bout a little chat with your big sis~?"

"Hm? Wait, isn’t this…"

"Ah…? Ain’t you Linlin’s damn brat…?"

"Guh…!! Whitebeard… and Kaidou…!!"

—And so, the one I’d caught was none other than the Charlotte family’s second son, Katakuri-kun, who’d been browsing the food stalls. He looks kinda scared—what’s up with that? Oh, right. He’s stuck between Whitebeard, the second-strongest on the ship who sent Mama flying, and Kaidou, the crazy violent big bro who’s always picking fights with Mama. Yeah, no wonder he’s freaking out. Well, too bad! Time for your cute big sis to work her magic and get everyone chatting nicely. Goal: Master of Ceremonies. Goal: Golden Hour. So—

"Aaaand welcome to Nue-chan’s Room~~~!! Today’s guest is the Charlotte family’s second son, mochi-powered donut lover, Katakuri-kun!! Clap clap clap—!!"

"Wha—what the…?"

"...The hell, Nue?! If you’re gonna invite a guest, at least pick someone decent!! You’re ruining my damn drink!!"

"That ain’t the damn problem here…"

I said it all hype, but nobody’s really feeling it. The only saving grace is Kaidou getting drunk and starting to spout nonsense—he’s surprisingly easy to play along with in this state. Doesn’t mean he makes sense, though.

Anyway, I turn to Katakuri, grinning as I pretend to hold a mic up to him (I don’t actually have one).

"So, Katakuri-kun! Heard any interesting stories from Mama about rare races? Or hey, you can tell us what kinda girls you like! Sisters are totally fair game too!!"

"The hell!? I don’t know shit!! Quit screwing around!!"

"OH?! WHO THE HELL YOU CALLIN’ A JOKE, HUH?! YOU SAYIN’ MY SIBLINGS ARE A JOKE?!!"

"N-no, I didn’t—"

"Hey, Kaidou!! Quit pickin’ on the damn kid, you idiot!!"

"Mm-hmm. I see, I see~ So Katakuri-kun likes… Brulee-chan and… huh!? M-me!? Ohhh no no no~ That’s a no-go, okay? Honestly, not interested—come back when you’re older and your bounty’s over a billion, ‘kay? ♡"

"I never said that!! The hell’re you making up, you moron!!"

"—THE FUCK YOU JUST CALL ME, BRAT?!!"

"I-I didn’t say it to y-you…"

"Knock it the hell off, Kaidou!! Lay a finger on that kid and I’ll sink you to the bottom of the sea right now!!"

"BRING IT, OLD MAN!!"

"Hmm. The convo’s heating up, but the material’s kinda weak. Hey, Katakuri—wanna spice it up with some pro wrestling? Kaidou or Whitebeard, pick one!"

"LIKE HELL I WILL!! JUST HELP ME ALREADY!!"

Katakuri-kun yells in protest as Kaidou grabs him by the collar. Whitebeard’s probably gonna step in, but I bet that’s scary too, huh? Getting caught between Kaidou and Whitebeard’s brawl. Oh well. I’ll help him out once I sort my thoughts.

...Still… races, huh… Having crewmates with all kinds of traits really gives a pirate crew some flair, y’know? Fish-men, merfolk, long-arms, long-legs, dwarves, giants, snake-necks, three-eyes… That last one’s a stretch, but the more bizarre the crew, the more fun it gets.

Like, imagine feeding one of them a Zoan-type Devil Fruit—even if they don’t turn out as monstrous as me or Kaidou, they’d still become some freakish powerhouse. Great for combat, great for entertainment.

Only problem is… Recruiting them’s easy, but how do we get our hands on the Devil Fruits? Feeding them knockoffs feels like a waste for someone with potential…

—Guess there’s only one way, huh?

I glance at the Captain, watching the games from the deck with amusement—his connections, his trade secrets. Maybe I’ll borrow his methods… or just inherit them when the time comes.

Smirking at the thought, I turn back to the chaos—

—Until:

"WORORORO!!! SCREW IT, I’LL TAKE ON BOTH LINLIN’S BRAT AND WHITEBEARD AT ONCE!!"

"I TOLD YOU TO KNOCK IT OFF, DUMBASS!! QUIT TURNING INTO A DRAGON!!"

"NUEEEEEEEE…!!! SOMEONE HELP MEEEE…!!!"

"…………Oops."

—Next thing I know, Kaidou’s in dragon form, squaring off against Whitebeard, and Katakuri-kun’s on the verge of tears, about to get caught in the crossfire. …Eh, I’ll stop ‘em now, so forgive me, ‘kay? Tehepero♡

—Later, Linlin showed up and beat the hell out of me.