Chapter 6: The Eldritch Goddess Wants to Escape

"The… student council…?"

I tilt my head, as if to say, What on earth is this person talking about?

"The secretary position is vacant. We’re shorthanded. Starting today, report to the council room after school."

Felix ignores my confusion entirely, drops this unilateral decree, and walks away.

"Wow, amazing! A personal recruitment from Lord Felix himself!"

"Uh… I-I never said I’d join…?"

Frieda is innocently delighted, but I’m completely lost.

"Really? The student council is the place to make connections! The president, Klaus, is the son of Imperial Chancellor Alexander, and Vice President Felix is the heir to the Starkburg ducal house—one of the empire’s most prestigious families!"

"I’d be perfectly content just… quietly attending classes…"

"Maybe your lack of ambition is what caught Lord Felix’s attention."

If I had ambition, it’d be to stay far away from the student council—a literal danger zone.

"But hey, the whole point of this academy is networking, right? You can study anywhere—even with a tutor. Most people are here to build connections."

"Isn’t that only for people like Klaus, who want to go into politics?"

"Nah, it’s not just politicians. Merchants need business partners, artists need patrons, and girls like us need to scout potential husbands!"

"Husbands..."

I’d been avoiding the thought, but… would I ever get married?

Though realistically, the only man who’d marry me would probably be a heretic lunatic like my father. That’s… unsettling. The idea of marrying a man is bad enough, but one with insanity as a bonus trait? Hard pass.

"Anyway, let me show you the council room. You’ll be going there from now on!"

"I haven’t actually agreed—"

"Seeing it might change your mind!"

Frieda bulldozes over my protests, and we head to the council room.

But seriously, what’s Felix’s deal? He clearly dislikes me, so why recruit me?

…Wait. Is this a trap?

Is he planning to bully me in the council? Endless paperwork, unpaid overtime, forced tea-fetching, shoulder massages, butt-groping—

Nooo! My peaceful academy life is over before it even began!

"We’re here!"

By the time I finish catastrophizing, we’ve arrived.

Despite being the domain of nobles and elites, the council room isn’t much fancier than my old high school’s—just a repurposed classroom. I’d expected gold-plated everything, so this is a relief.

"Helloooo!"

"Ah—Frieda, wait—!"

Too late. She swings the door open.

"Well, hello there!"

The one greeting us like a shopkeeper is none other than Klaus, the student council president.

"Ah, Miss Iris! Felix told me all about it. So you’ll be our new secretary? Man, we’ve been desperate for help—this is a lifesaver!"

"N-No, I haven’t actually agreed—"

"Your desk’s over here! Duties include meeting minutes, dictation, and schedule management. Do you know how to use a typewriter?"

"No…"

"Hahaha! Don’t worry—neither do I!"

"Excuse me?!"

Shouldn’t you know that?! What have you been doing all this time?!

"Felix can teach you. He’s good at everything."

"Or maybe you’re just good at nothing."

Felix himself appears, scowling.

"Oh, speak of the devil! Our vice president, treasurer, and interim secretary, Felix!"

"Wait, that’s… every role except president?"

"Yep! I’m bad at math, and I can’t use a typewriter!"

"That’s not something to brag about."

Ah, right. Klaus was always like this in the game. Memories are flooding back.

"Haaah. Well, the vice president doesn’t have much to do anyway. That’s why I handle the grunt work. Sit down, Miss Iris."

Felix forces me into the secretary’s chair with all the grace of a prison warden.

"I’ll teach you how to use the typewriter. Pay attention."

"Y-Yes, sir."

His sharp tone makes me instinctively shrink back.

And so, he teaches me how to use the typewriter. Now, as someone from a past life where word processors had already gone extinct, replaced by far more convenient word processing software, allow me to share my honest opinion:

This thing is a nightmare!

One typo, and it’s permanent. Indenting requires wrestling with the machine like it’s a wild animal. Did our ancestors really suffer through this torture? I want to weep for them.

"...You’re a fast learner."

Felix watches as I frantically clack away at the keys, his voice tinged with something almost like approval.

"So, Felix? Think she’ll work out?"

"Yeah. She’ll do fine as secretary."

"Perfect! Welcome aboard, Iris!"

Somehow, the atmosphere has shifted to one where "I never agreed to this!" is no longer an option.

"You should learn to use the typewriter too while you’re at it, Klaus."

"Nah, nah. That’s what we have a secretary for. I’m the student council president—my job is to delegate. My old man always said, ‘Listen, Klaus. A politician’s greatest skill is getting others to do what he won’t.’"

"Your father is a terrible person…"

I agree wholeheartedly, Felix.

"Don’t worry, there’s a reward for you. What do you want, Iris?"

Klaus plops onto the secretary’s desk, grinning like a car salesman.

"I’d just like a peaceful school life. That’s all."

"How about exemption from makeup exams?"

"Makeup… exams?"

That ominous phrase sends a chill down my spine.

"You wouldn’t know this, but Professor Adolf in physics and Professor Konrad in math are demons. Students who fail their tests get dragged into endless remedial classes and retests. Plenty of poor souls have lost their entire summer break to those two."

Gulp.

"But if you serve as our secretary, I’ll flex my political influence on your behalf!"

"Please do."

"Excellent."

I’m terrible at both physics and math. Just looking at equations makes me nauseous.

"Good for you, Felix. Now you’re free from secretary duties."

"Yeah."

Felix stares at me again, silent and intense. Did our little deal upset him? Say something, please~!

"You."

He steps closer, looming over me.

"What are you?"

This time, it’s not an accusation—just genuine, unsettling curiosity.

"I’m Iris. Nothing more, Lord Felix."

I smile sweetly, but deep inside, I feel something else smiling back at me.