Chapter 26: A House Call and the Couple's Little Nest

Lately, Magical Girl Black, after being subjected to Ren Akiyama’s rather intensive and frankly quite invasive "talk therapy," and after experiencing a series of events that could only be described as profoundly "immoral," had finally, with a weary, resigned heart, made a decision.

She appeared before the brand-new, modern house the organization had built for the Akiyama family, right next to her own. It was a residence specially, and with frightening efficiency, arranged by the organization, boasting an extremely high level of secrecy and state-of-the-art security. Although, in many cases, Black knew, even a fortress like this could probably be breached—after all, the abilities of Espers were bizarre, varied, and often completely reality-breaking. Someone, somewhere, would always be able to slip through the cracks. That was just a fact of life in this crazy, new world.

Of course, the house the organization had built was, undeniably, quite impressive. Two whole, separate villas, side-by-side. When Black had first become a magical girl, she had idly dreamed of one day buying a small, respectable villa for Hana. And now, before she had even started seriously saving for it, the organization had already built one for her. Well, "villa" might be stretching the definition a bit… and a villa wasn't really that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things. The truly, obscenely rich, she knew, lived in sprawling, multi-acre manors with their own private armies. But this… this was still very, very nice. At least for Black who had, until very recently, been living in a cramped, aging apartment, this was the absolute, undeniable height of unimaginable luxury.

In her hands, she held a carefully selected gift box containing a set of high-end cosmetics for Mrs. Akiyama, along with two bottles of rather premium, and hopefully impressive white liquor for Mr. Akiyama. With a deep, fortifying breath, she knocked on the Akiyama family’s brand-new front door.

The one who opened it was Ren’s mother. She was taken aback for a single, stunned moment upon seeing the petite, gothic-lolita-esque Magical Girl Black standing on her doorstep, and then her face broke into a wide, joyful, almost radiant smile. “Oh my goodness! Kenji-san! Please, please, come in! This is the first time I’ve actually seen you like this in person! It was always just on those grainy videos before. You’re even cuter in real life!”

Black managed an awkward smile and held up the gifts as a sort of shield.

“Oh, look at you! Kenji-san, honestly! With our two families being so close now, you really didn’t need to bring anything at all!” Mrs. Akiyama chided gently.

Just then, Ren’s father, Mr. Akiyama, also came out from the living room, a warm, welcoming smile on his face. He took in the slightly surreal scene and said, “Well now, dear, since Kenji-san went to all the trouble of bringing them over, we should absolutely accept them. We’re in-laws now, aren’t we? And there’s no reason not to accept a thoughtful gift from your in-laws. It’s practically a rule! Come in, come in and sit, Kenji-san!”

Black walked, with a certain self-conscious awkwardness, into their beautiful new home. It was clear the cheerful couple had already completely settled in; at least, all the various high-tech facilities and appliances seemed to be working smoothly and efficiently. She sat down stiffly on the edge of their plush, comfortable sofa, suddenly feeling very, very small, and conspicuously silent.

Mr. Akiyama, ever the gracious host, brewed a fresh pot of fragrant tea. “Here, try some of this, Kenji-san. This tea was a lovely moving-in gift from a sweet young lady who lives next door, Miss Natsume. You weren’t here at the time, of course, otherwise, you would have surely gotten a share too. I hear it’s the really good stuff, the kind they sell by the gram on the market! I’ve never had such a fine, expensive thing in my entire, simple life. But since you’re here today, my friend, let’s have a cup together, as in-laws.”

In-laws… The word echoed strangely, almost mockingly in Black's mind. An unwelcome, high-definition image of all the recent, deeply compromising events flashed through her head, including but not limited to: being held by their son, being kissed by their son, hiding pathetically in their son’s bedcovers…

What am I doing?! She thought, a fresh, almost overwhelming wave of pure panic rising in her chest. I am a destroyer of my own daughter’s precious relationship! I am actively tempting their wonderful, outstanding son into becoming a despicable, two-timing cheater! The potential negative influence on the youth of today is simply immeasurable! I am a monster!

Wait a minute… a girl named Natsume? Akari Natsume? Could it possibly be a certain, perpetually cheerful Strawberry Sweetheart? Why does it feel like she’s haunting my every waking moment? Speaking of which, if she was giving out fancy, expensive moving-in gifts, even if I wasn’t here at the time, shouldn’t she have given a portion to Akiyama-san and had him pass it on to me? I didn’t see her send me any fancy tea. What’s the deal, Strawberry Sweetheart! Are you slighting me?!

However, she didn’t have the mental capacity, not at this very moment, to dwell on the potential Strawberry Sweetheart problem. She just felt an overwhelming, crushing sense of profound guilt towards the kind, smiling couple sitting in front of her. How should one put it? She had done something very, very immoral, something deeply, unforgivably wrong. And now, seeing this happy, trusting couple, she just felt, with a certainty that was almost absolute, that she should probably just fall on a sword and atone for her sins.

“You know, Kenji-san,” Mr. Akiyama began, a warm, friendly smile on his face, “I have to admit, I thought you would come over in your… ah… your usual, un-transformed state. Seeing you in this little girl form, I have to say, I’m still not quite used to it. You look even younger than your own Hana-chan by a good few years! If we were to all walk out together, people might even mistake you for our granddaughter!” He said this with a hearty, booming laugh, though Black couldn’t quite decipher what kind of laugh it was. Was it amused? Was it mocking? She couldn’t tell.

“Well, if I had to say,” Black explained, her voice a little stiff, “it’s… it’s simply easier to deal with sudden, unforeseen situations by maintaining this form. It can even, in some cases, prevent a lot of potential accidents from happening.” She elaborated, trying to sound professional and not at all like a man who was terrified of turning back into himself. “To put it simply, in this form, even if I were to be hit by a car while walking down the street, it’s the car that would go flying, not me. It’s very, very difficult to get seriously injured. And I can, for the most part, do basically anything I want. There’s a certain… feeling… of being young and omnipotent that makes it very, very hard to want to change back.”

Ren’s mother, at this point, leaned in closer, her eyes sparkling with a mixture of curiosity and undisguised envy as she examined Black. “So that’s how it is! I knew it! And look at your skin! It’s just like a young girl’s, so smooth and flawless! To gain an Esper ability at this age and become young again… who in their right mind would ever want to change back? I bet you probably don’t have any of those annoying backaches or stiff shoulders anymore, do you?” She looked very, very envious.

Black nodded, a little sheepishly. “I must say, it really does feel like I’ve returned to my teens. So, yes, I don’t really want to change back right now, if I can help it.”

“Well, you’re certainly honest about it, aren’t you?” Ren’s father said with a surprised laugh. “I thought for sure you’d have some kind of long, complicated excuse. After all, being so direct… that’s not really your usual character, is it, Kenji?”

Black scratched her head awkwardly. Well, if it weren’t for your son, I probably would have… “In any case,” she said, desperate to change the subject, “I… came here today to let you know that Hana has been officially transferred to be Magical Girl Red’s new Supporter. She’ll be working in A-City for a while, but she’ll be setting up teleportation circles on both sides, so it’s possible she might come back at night after work during the day. And… if I’m not home at night, I was hoping she could still, perhaps, come over to your place for dinner or something… if it’s not too much trouble.”

“Look at you, Kenji-san!” Ren’s father immediately, and with a great deal of theatrical indignation, exclaimed. “Even though you’ve become a cute magical girl, you’re not cute at all, you know that? How can you say such a thing! Hana-chan is our beloved daughter-in-law! Do you honestly think we would ever let her go hungry? And you had to make a special, formal trip, and even bring all these expensive gifts, just to ask us such a thing? Aren’t you being a little too distant, a little too formal with us now? What’s the meaning of this, huh? You don’t want to marry your precious Hana off to our wonderful Ren anymore, is that it? Now that you’re a famous, powerful magical girl, you’re starting to look down on us simple folk, is that it?!”

“NO! That’s not what I meant at all!” Black immediately tried to explain. “I just… I just… sigh. Forget it! I’m not going to argue with you! In any case, that’s the situation! I’ll… I’ll be going now!”

And just like that, before anyone could stop her, she fled.

“That Kenji, honestly,” Mr. Akiyama grumbled, though a fond smile was on his face.

His wife then said, a wistful look in her eyes, “It really, truly makes one envious, doesn’t it? If only I could suddenly awaken the ability to become a magical girl, then I could go back to being sixteen again!”

“Back to sixteen, eh? And what would you do then, my love?”

“Well, of course, the very first thing I’d do is kick you, you old geezer, right to the curb!”

“And what if I changed too? What then?”

“I’d still kick you to the curb. I’m not into yuri, you know. I’d go find a handsome, rich, and much younger young man.”

“…” Mr. Akiyama, with a wounded look on his face, simply scooped his laughing wife up into his arms and carried her, protesting playfully, towards the bedroom.

...

Meanwhile, on the other side of the wall, Hana Tanaka was in Ren Akiyama’s hospital room. They were, in fact, discussing a very, very important matter.

“You… you already have enough money to buy your own house? For us?” Hana looked at Ren, her eyes wide with a mixture of shock and disbelief.

Ren nodded, a calm, reassuring smile on his face. “Although it’s certainly different from the grand villa the organization built for your father, if it’s just a quiet, comfortable place for the two of us to live, it’s more than enough. I was thinking… we can buy a nice little house somewhere, not tell your father or my parents, and then just the two of us can move in together. A secret love nest.”

Why did Ren Akiyama have this sudden and rather drastic idea? Because, frankly, Miss Magical Girl Black’s recent behavior had been truly outrageous. Although he desperately wanted to find Magical Girl Lapis Lazuli, Moeka, and have a very serious, very long talk with her about the consequences of her "advice," he was still, unfortunately, bedridden and in no condition to do so. But that story, that terrifying story about a magical girl getting pregnant and then being permanently, irrevocably stuck in her magical girl form…

He was genuinely afraid that one day he would wake up and be… assaulted… by a very desperate, and very powerful, Magical Girl Black.

So, a secret and hopefully very secure little nest for the two of them, a place unknown to anyone else, was a very, very good, and very necessary choice. Hana could, with her magic, set up a permanent teleportation circle in that little nest. And he, Ren, could then install a hidden panic button. And if Magical Girl Black ever, ever tried anything… inappropriate… on him, he could immediately, and with great prejudice, press the button, and then, in a flash of light, Hana would teleport back to save him. In that case, Magical Girl Black would probably, hopefully, not try anything funny with him again.

It wasn’t that Ren was acting like he’d gotten a good deal and was now complaining about it—if Black did actually do something to him, from a purely worldly, biological perspective, Ren would technically be the one to… profit, so to speak. And besides, he himself, he had to admit, wasn’t entirely immune to getting… excited… by Magical Girl Black’s undeniably cute body. But it was precisely because of this, because of this dangerous, confusing, and deeply immoral possibility, that he had to do this. The closer you walk to a dangerous, crumbling cliff’s edge, the more careful, the more cautious you must be. A gentleman, as the old saying goes, does not stand under a collapsing wall. Since he knew that such a terrible, awkward, and potentially relationship-ending thing could possibly happen, he had to, with all his might, eliminate any and all possibilities of it ever, ever happening. Otherwise, how could he ever say that he truly loved Hana? How could he ensure that his love for her was pure, was true? How could he possibly maintain his own integrity, his own sense of self?

Hana, hearing his heartfelt (if slightly edited) proposal, immediately, and with a happy little cry, hugged Ren tightly. “Oh, Ren! I love you so much…”

A faint, gentle white light began to emanate from her body, falling upon Ren, and slowly, tenderly, beginning to heal his injuries. However, her healing magic wasn't that powerful, not yet anyway, and she hadn’t practiced it very much. The healing of a completely fractured bone would be a rather slow, gradual process. So, she just held him silently, her warmth and her magic seeping into him.

In fact, this particular healing spell of hers had some rather significant flaws. For example, in the case of a broken bone, if a doctor hadn’t properly, professionally set the misaligned bone beforehand, then when she performed her healing magic, both ends of the broken, jagged bone would just start to grow on their own. And it was entirely possible that they would end up growing incorrectly, piercing through the person’s own skin and internal organs in the process. So, it wasn’t an ideal or even particularly safe healing spell. And Hana, at her current level, couldn’t yet use the more advanced, more reliable, and significantly less likely to cause grievous bodily harm, healing spells.

“Hana, you don’t have to do this,” Ren murmured into her hair. “We finally have a couple of days off. If you use up all your mana healing me like this, then your vacation will be over before it even starts, won’t it?”

Hana just hugged him tighter. “You’re not the type of person who would slack off and take a vacation when there’s work to be done anyway.”

Ren just gently patted Hana’s back. “Hana, listen to me. When you go to A-City, if you run into anything you can’t solve on your own, you have to promise me you’ll discuss it with me. Don’t force yourself, okay? You have to remember, being a Supporter is a dangerous job. It’s a job with a real, quantifiable mortality rate. When it comes to matters of life and death, you have to be willing to use any means necessary to survive, no matter how embarrassing or unheroic they might seem. Asking for help, for backup, is not shameful at all. No one will ever blame you for it.”

Hana knew this was Ren’s way of talking about Magical Girl Black, about her father. If she and Red ever ran into an opponent they couldn’t handle, they should ask Black for help. And even if it required her to fly all the way over there directly, Hana knew, with absolute certainty, that Black would probably arrive in A-City at top speed. Ren clearly didn’t want her to do anything needlessly reckless, to take any unnecessary risks.

“And you’re still talking about this, after that ridiculous thing you did in front of the Darkmoon Queen!” Hana suddenly said, a playful pout in her voice. “I still haven’t forgiven you for that, you know!” This was, of course, referring to the infamous incident where Ren had heroically, and with great fanfare, dropped his bath towel.

Ren scratched his head awkwardly, a fresh blush rising to his cheeks. “That… well, you see, Hana… if you’ll just listen to my explanation… that was a completely unavoidable, last-ditch, tactical situation…”