The Greatest Avalanche

04: Puppy Hell

I think my brain shut down out of a combination of sheer fear and incredulity.

It hadn’t been hard to figure out what was carrying me. The sudden appearance had been a good clue, but the sound of shifting stone and tingle of my senses were proof enough of what had picked me up.

Badgermole.

Giant badger + mole, with ability to manipulate stone that exceeded the ability of most earth benders.

This brought me to the next issue.

Everyone was aware of badgermoles being hyper carnivores. Oh, that wasn’t the term Earth Kingdom people did, but like, casual references in stories like them ‘ruling the mountains’ or eating basically whatever they wanted left little doubt in my mind. Sure, they usually focused on them being earth benders which was in itself fascinating, but that didn’t exactly do much to help my situation.

Which was best described as ‘being carried away by a hyper carnivore about twenty times my size’. The only consolation I had was that it probably wasn’t going to eat me as they preferred larger prey than bony little girls. But that brought up a question of what it was doing with me as it padded along a tunnel it apparently had no issue navigating.

I had plenty of time to come up with theories as it just carried me away.

1. The stories were bullshit and it was definitely bringing me back to its den to eat me. Just because an animal was outside preferred prey size did not mean it wouldn’t eat it if opportunity arose. A crocodile guarding a nest would probably ignore a squirrel in the foliage nearby, but if that squirrel happened to walk right in front of the crocodile and chitter angrily at it for existing, that was probably a dead squirrel. Granted, the comparison fell thin here. Might be better to compare a T Rex and an angry chihuahua objecting to the former’s presence.

I ranked this one as fairly likely. There were stories of them saving people, and I knew animals could show altruism. Apes sometimes guarded children who fell in exhibits, after all. But the thought that a hyper carnivore would do this for a random morsel was unlikely.

Sure, Earth Kingdom stories painted them as benevolent masters of their environment, but they were earth bending creatures. We were earth benders. Come on. The propaganda was right there. Not like you want your spiritual mascot to have a reputation as a rabid killer.

1. It wasn’t going to eat me, but any cubs it had might.

This theory stood for the same reasons as above. If I was particularly unlucky, I was ‘practice’ prey. Joy.

1. It actually wasn’t going to eat me and had was bringing me back to the surface.

I found this unlikely. If it had wanted to save me, it could have just continued out the cave we had been in. There’d been a faint breeze, after all, which meant the surface was close and it wasn’t like the things nesting up above could have stopped it.

There were other theories, but I discounted them as I was pretty sure I was going to die.

Sorry Lan Lan. I would have liked to see you again but I had to try to reclaim some agency and go for a walk as a stupid little blind girl who didn’t even have a fucking walking stick.

Sorry to my parents as well. I didn’t love them like the original person likely would have, but I could tell they tried even if they weren’t great at it, particularly my dad.

Most of the other servants were fine, although I hadn’t interacted with them much.

…

Master Yu could go fuck himself though. I hope he sat on an anthill.

I sighed.

There was nothing to do but wait as the Badgermole’s weight resonated down the tunnels with a click of claw with every step.

~~~~

I kinda wished the badgermole would hurry up though.

This was taking a while and there was only so many ways I could play ‘I hear with my little ear’ with the answer being ‘badgermole steps on stone’.

~~~~

I jolted awake at the sound of high pitched squeaks approaching.

The badgermole was still languidly carrying me. The scent of stone remained, but now there was a musky scent mixed with something like fresh earth. It wasn’t horrible, but it was strong.

Straining my ears, I realized the squeaks weren’t approaching us. We were approaching them.

Ah. So now I was going to die.

My kidnapper certainly took her damn time, but we were finally at her nest and I was to be food for the little ones.

I guess that was a neat way to go out. Better than slipping and snapping my neck or dying of the plague.

My skin tingled as the badgermole stomped, and stone shifted. The squeaks became far louder and then all around and beneath me. I heard fur rustling, and, well…

I was honestly reminded of puppies. Puppies that were likely going to eat my face, and—

I felt a nuzzle on my foot, impossibly smooth fluff and whiskers. “Eep!” I squeaked, bringing my foot up to get out of range of the floofing monster beneath me.

Unfortunately, this exposed my sandal which was promptly grabbed and tugged off my foot.

“Hey! That’s mine” I shouted in indignation or surprise. I really wasn’t sure. It was ridiculous, though, and I squeaked as my exposed foot was snuffled by curious whiskery beings, making me hold up my feet to get away.

This worked until I was set on the ground and was subjected to the worst fate imaginable.

…

Puppy Hell.

Technically it was cub Hell, but Puppy Hell sounded better. Plus, the experience was the exact same as being lowered into a cage full of excitable puppies eager to lick every inch of your face. Well, barring that each cub was the size of a golden retriever. Which oddly helped the image.

Subjected to this torment, I was only able to last so long before it happened.

I broke out in giggles. I genuinely couldn’t help it. They were so curious snuffling and sniffing me, and to make it worse, they found the ticklish spots only Lan Lan knew, too which had me giggling even worse.

The cubs eventually let me sit up after thoroughly investigating me while the adult settled down nearby.

A thought crystallized in my mind.

I suppose it was a bad news/good news moment.

Bad news, I had badgermole slobber all over my face.

Good news, they thought I was a badgermole and I had been summarily adopted. Maybe because I was just that pathetic in the tunnels? Or maybe it was because I was an earth bender and I ‘felt’ right to them?

But it meant I wasn’t going to die.

…

“I’m not going to die,” I said, softly. I felt the smile stretching on my face even as I wiped my eyes.

Unfortunately, this flicker of happiness to continue my own existence was picked up by the badgermole cubs, who all proceeded to subject me to Puppy Hell once more.

Thus, my life among the badgermoles began.

~~~~

AN:

HiddenMaster: Toph’s been adopted oh no

But in all seriousness, this scene was the result of me thinking long and hard on how to make Toph’s encounter with the badgermoles adorable and cute and absolutely something canon Toph would not admit to because it’d ruin her tough girl image.

You know what? It’s canon to me. Canon Toph experienced puppy hell among badgermoles, she just never shared it because it’d ruin her tough girl image.

Chapter is a bit short, but this was a nice cutting off point. Tbh, it would probably fit more with last chapter, but here we are. I think I will write Toph properly getting her first bending lessons (real ones) next chapter.

I know I am taking it slow here, but I am wanting to look closer at some things in Toph’s life, and canonically her time among the badgermoles was summarized very quickly. I mean it worked, but I wanna have some fun here.

That and this Toph perhaps taking some slightly different lessons from the badgermoles this time around.

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