WFT 07

World’s Fluffiest Teacher

07: Foxxonapped

After her meeting with Mayor Stone— it always was a little amusing to her that a gargoyle had ended up with the name Stone of all things, but then the man did have a golem for a mother, she sought out Raine.

The fox was not at the cafe she’d left her at, nor was she at the library or any other particular place of interest she could track Raine’s scent or magical signature to.

She even got to the point of flying over the city to see if that would help her locate her missing student. It was becoming... increasingly frustrating, finding no evidence of where her student had gone. It didn’t seem like Raine to just up and disappear suddenly like that.

So she started questioning the locals, which was equally fruitless. Sure, they’d seen Raine... but mostly they’d seen Raine when the two of them were together. It wasn’t until she reached the cafe where she’d left the kitsune again that she actually made any headway.

There, she found a fisherman enjoying himself on leave after a good haul. “Oh yeah, saw that,” he told Prismatia with the tone of someone who’d seen something heartwarming. “I’d seen the one-tailed fox hanging out there and figured something was wrong, but she didn’t seem upset. Still, no one was reacting, but here’s the thing,” he leaned forward.

“I’ve been to the East, even had a stint with a kitsune girlfriend a few years back, and they always have at least two tails. That poor thing was young and alone, so right as I was getting ready to go check if she was alright, those two Kitsune aunties came up. Four or five tails a piece, they talked to her and got her back to the Great Den via a portal. Lovely work, always good to see an orphan finding a good home.”

“That was my student and I left her alone for thirty minutes— that wasn’t an adoption, that was a kidnapping.” Prismatia restrained her ire, purple flame sparking between her teeth.

“Huh. I misjudged that something fierce. My bad,” he said with a shrug. “Bagel?” he offered. His supposed tea smelled strongly of alcohol.

“...I appreciate the offer, sir, but I have some things to attend to,” Prismatia huffed, before launching herself skyward in one smooth motion. Unfortunately for the poor fisherman, the backblast of wind from her ascent sent his bagel flying.

It appeared Prismatia would have to go to the Great Den and explain some things. Perhaps even some Aggressive Explanation, the sort usually accompanied by dragonfire if the foxes proved too stubborn about the facts of the case.

It was possible she wasn’t thinking straight. It was even more possible that she was enraged enough to be seeing red. But... nobody messed with her students, and especially not for one so... special, Raine. She’d prefer to avoid escalating this, but... if she had to? She would do so without hesitation.

~~~~

Raine found herself summarily kicked through and into the portal the two kitsune had made. It felt almost like she descended into the earth, evoking a feeling of scurrying through the shadows before she popped out in a large…

Colorful nursery, apparently. The walls were plastered with drawings of a thousand and one different childish things, the sound of laughter and kids playing echoed in the large room, and nearly a hundred different sets of eyes watched her curiously as she rubbed her rear where she’d landed and looked around.

“Where the fuck am I?” Raine asked aloud, feeling very disoriented.

“Welcome to the Great Den! It’s... well, it’s the traditional home of our kind. Kitsune from all over gather here for safety and companionship... and you know, fox things,” the black-furred kitsune, Sai, explained.

“Mhm! We’re going to be placing you with the kits in your age range until we find you a good family to take you in!” Sae, the white-furred one of the pair, explained.

Raine’s eye twitched. She was getting just a little irked. A fun day out touring a fantasy port with a whimsical history fit for a Pratchett novel. She’d have found all that literally fantastical prior. To top it off, she was with a lovely mentor she couldn’t stop thinking about lately and had turned into a literal kidnapping. But oh no, it didn’t end there.

If, if they’d just kidnapped her for ransom or whatever, she’d almost understand that. But apparently their fennec fox ears were for show as they thought she was a literal child despite everything she’d said, and they thought they were doing her a favor.

Raine’s claws came out and her fur bristled as her anger built. The two older kitsune started a bit at her as she finally snapped. “Listen here you two fucking moronic imbeciles. I will tell you one. More. FUCKING. TIME. I am not a cub, a kit, a pup, a child of any variety. I am a grown adult, and you just took me from a lovely day out with my mentor to the asshole end of nowhere you literal shitstains. I demand you bring me the fuck back if you want to right this horrifically stupid wrong you have committed. Do. You. Understand. Me. You. Daft. Cunts?” she ranted.

“How vile. Who taught you how to use those kind of words? Kits certainly shouldn’t be using such filthy language,” Sae clicked her tongue.

“Indeed. We’re going to have to have to wash your mouth out with soap... and if you keep being foul-mouthed after that?” Sai said, as she shoved a reddish bar of soap that smelled strongly of strawberries into Raine’s mouth. “Bathtime. Dirty kits need to get clean!”

Raine flipped both of them off.

“...Hmm, don’t know what that means, but it was rude. Bathtime for naughty little foxes!” Sae said, grabbing Raine by the scruff of her neck and forcibly transforming her into a fox.

Rainne tried to thrash and swipe at the two, but the moment they grabbed her by the neck something in her felt a switch flip.

Fur, far more than before, sprouted, her body contracted with a feeling that could only be described as taking a reverse shit, and her coordination took a nosedive off a cliff while her sense of smell skyrocketed.

Raine flailed, growled, and shrieked as she was forced into fox form for the first time. Of course, she didn’t exactly get to admire her state, or her long, bushy black tail as she was held in place by the two aunties.

And then she was carried off, and tossed into an... admittedly warm bath, before being scrubbed clean and dried off with a hair dryer-looking device... which was scarier to the foxy part of her than she’d wanted to admit. It was so damn loud!

“There you go, little one. In with the other kits!” Sai said, tossing her into what looked like a smaller den full of excitable fox kits.

Raine lunged for Sae’s hand but was too uncoordinated on her new legs, so she just tripped over herself and had to settle for a growl. The two kitsune aunties waved to her as they closed the door behind them.

Raine had barely gotten back onto all fours when she felt half a dozen snoots pressing in as she was thoroughly sniffed by curious kitsune kits. She whirled, startling a snow-white kit, that yapped at her, bending low and looking up at her, wagging its tail.

The teacher turned kitsune turned fox was… discombobulated, in a word. She wanted to be angry but literally could not even focus more than the bare basics.

Oddly, it was her tail that helped center herself. She’d gotten used to the tail since becoming a kitsune and that fateful meeting with Sumire. Days and nights of it a constant fixture on her body, its responses, the twitches, the way it wanted to wag of its own accord when she was excited, and the way it swayed to balance out her walk, all came together.

Thus, starting with her tail, Raine regained control over her body, using it as a basis point to understand how she was, and then moving. Quadrupedal locomotion was distinctly different, and the balance, the shift, the way her paws led her to move different with a certain cadence to the movement, but it gradually came to her.

This was not helped, at all, by the stream of kits who came and went, most just sniffing her or trying to play but losing interest when she could barely stand. A few seemed sad, even when she didn’t reciprocate, and Raine did feel a little bad…

But that was overwritten by the overwhelming anger at being put in this situation. She was humiliated, treated as a child, and totally ignored. Raine wanted to bite a bitch.

Eventually, she found herself able to walk and actually taking in her surroundings.

It was a nursery, and one meant for the very young, too. There were literal dog, or in this case, fox toys scattered around, soft bedding, and places for young foxes to play and frolic. The foxes themselves seemed to vary. Some were very… well, fox like, with little sign of higher intelligence she could see, but the way some looked at her, head tilted, figuring things out, spoke they were not normal foxes. Those were the ones who just watched her, while the others just seemed confused why she was moving so awkwardly or even worried about her.

“What’s the matter, stuck?” a young child’s voice called out.

Raine whirled, finding herself staring down a small child. He wore shorts and a shirt, and was leaning back on a large colorful block the size of a chair in the room. His hair was blonde, eyes blue, and his tail slowly waved back and forth while his ears were perked straight up.

Raine opened her mouth, but could not speak. She could only whine.

“Yeah, looks like you’re stuck. I was stuck a while back. Kept wanting to open a cookie jar, but couldn’t with the paws, and eventually I poofed. So yeah, you just gotta poof, and you’re good to go,” the boy said, giving her a thumbs up.

Raine huffed.

He blinked. “Huh. Poof not working? Um… I know!” he clapped. “Reach inside until you feel like you’re gonna hurl, and then go to the left! That’s how I did it.”

Raine stared at the boy uncomprehendingly, but being in fox form by force, she was very, very unhappy, and decided to give it a shot.

She closed her eyes, trying to reach inward like in the mana exercises Prismatia taught her. Not true magic, that was all linguistic English. But the raw energy of magic everyone had, that was there deep inside, and it would be her starting point.

The exercise, despite her state, went normally, leaving her tingly. Raine then floundered, not really sure what else to do before deciding to just pull at her internal magic.

Two things happened in rapid succession.

One, this felt really weird. She didn’t feel like she was going to hurl, but she felt like a hand was inside her belly dancing on fingertips. Two, when she moved that to the left as the boy instructed, her fur bristled, and then ignited with foxfire, leaving her…

Furless.

Her paws also shifted to become hands. She knew this as she could feel all twenty fingers.

Raine whirled, looking all over at herself, then saw her reflection in a mounted mirror nearby. Four hands at end of fox legs. Furless fox form. No fluffy tail.

Wrong did not begin to describe her appearance. Cursed was more appropriate.

“Don’t stop there! Left, go Left!” the boy yelled, wide eyed.

Raine metaphysically grabbed that power inside, visualized her human form, and twisted to the left like she was driving on a highway and about to hit an old lady holding a basket of puppies.

Foxfire enveloped her form, and then Raine was there, back to normal. Human form, black hair, floofy tail, like she hadn’t become an unholy abomination.

Raine looked up, still on all fours. In that moment, Raine knew one thing for absolutely certain. She was never telling Prismatia about this.

“Whew, that was…. Kinda scary Lady,” the boy said.

The human turned kitsune blinked. “No kidding,” she said, rising  to her feet. “I, um… yeah I don’t want to do that again.”

“Yeah, go waaaaaaaaay more left, not just a little left,” the boy said. “I’m Kei! Why’s your form so tall? You know they don’t think you’re actually an adult with just one tail, right? Can’t fake that.” He said it like it was obvious.

Raine sighed. “I have found that out.”

“Hmm… could be used to get cookies better, though,” Kei said, before brightening. “Hey idea! Gang! Get over here!” Before Raine could answer, he whistled. Half a dozen frolicking foxes froze, ran over, and effortlessly shifted to human form as kitsune children. Not one of them paused midway like she had. Four girls, two other boys, with Kei making up the leader.

“This IS Michi, Nobu, Ai, her sister Airi, Miki, and Sana!” Kei said, introducing each rapid fire.

A copper headed girl pulled on Raine’s sleeve. “I’m Sana,” she said.

Raine was feeling a little… overwhelmed. Children had never been something she had much experience with, and she’d taught at college as a human. “Uh. Hi, Sana.”

“Do you wanna play Fops Around and Find out?” Sana asked.

“Hey, I was gonna ask her!” Kei shouted, tail swishing back and forth.

Sana stuck her tongue out.

“I don’t know what that is,” Raine said, feeling a little nervous now as the other foxes studied her intently.

Sana and Kei gasped simultaneously.

“It’s fun!” Sana began. “Someone becomes a seeker and the others hide as stuff around and the seeker has to find them! See, watch,” Sana said, before closing her eyes. Foxfire enveloped her and then a… cup with a fluffy fox tail was left sitting in her place.

“I can still see you,” Raine said.

“No, you can’t,” the cup known as Sana said.

Kei and the other kits snorted. One, Michi? Leaned close to whisper up at Raine, “Sana’s so bad at this…”

Despite being kidnapped, Raine felt a smile tugging at her lips. It wasn’t like these kits had orchestrated things, after all. Still…

“Sorry, I don’t think I can. I need to get going,” she explained.

“Ah, why not?” Kei asked.

Sana transformed back into her kitsune form. Her ears were folded, and her eyes downcast.

Raine faltered as her will met cuteness and almost crumpled immediately. “Sorry, but a great purple dragon is going to get angry if I’m gone too long.”

“Dragon? What’s that?” Sana asked.

“Like a big purple lizard! With wings!” Kei explained enthusiastically. He then shifted, looking…

He looked like a giant gecko, just… with wings haphazardly mounted on its butt and the size of a dog.

“That’s… not quite right,” Raine said, having nearly tripped. “I’m going to try to leave now.”

“Awww,” Sana whimpered, nearly breaking Raine’s will again but she wasn’t kidding. Prismatia was likely furious.

“Won’t work, but welcome to try,” Kei said, back in humanoid form.

Raine ignored him, walking to the door the kitsune aunties had left. She found the door unlocked and opened it, finding a three tailed Kitsune sitting outside reading a book whose cover seemed…

Incredibly homoerotic and involved manly ninjas. It read, “Star Crossed Kunai.”

“What are you doing out here, kit? Shouldn’t you be playing with the others?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I’m not a kit. There’s been a misunderstanding here, and I need to leave to go see my friend, Prismatia,” Raine said, hoping name dropping her mentor’s name would get some sort of reaction after being ignored beforehand by the two aunties.

“Yeah, sure, whatever you say. A onetail being a Mourningwood student? Nice try kitto,” the fox said, pushing Raine back into the den with one surprisingly strong tail.

“Wait!” Raine shrieked, before the door summarily closed behind her. She harrumphed, and opened the door again, stepping out. “Will you listen to me? I—"

And before she could finish her sentence, she was shoved back inside the den and the door simply vanished right before her eyes.

Raine stared, wide eyed before cursing. “Your taste in fiction was trash, you know that!?” she shouted spitefully.

Raine felt at the door, or where it should be, but naturally didn’t find anything. Frustrated, she stomped back to the sit on one of the oversized blocks.

Kei and his gang were still there, only missing popcorn. “Told you,” he said smugly.

“It’s a load of bullshit, is what it is,” Raine said unhappily.

Contrary to her expectations, or shock, the kits all simultaneously turned their heads slightly, ears perking. “Bullshit?” Sana asked, mouthing over the strange English word. The air trembled, ever so slightly.

In that moment, Raine realized she was at a crossroads of destiny and fate.

She could sit here and wait to be rescued by Prismatia like a damsel in distress. It would happen, there’s no way Prismatia wasn’t aware of her absence and being a great dragon and headmistress of a magical academy, Raine was confident the dragon would find her and get her out of here. Might take a bit, but it would happen.

Or she could do something devious.

Raine chose devious.

“Say,” Raine breathed. “Would you kits like to learn some fun magic words? In English?” the air briefly trembled again at the mention of the language of magic, something the kits seemed to pick up on.

“YES!” Sana screamed, but the other kits were not far behind.

Raine was many things. A teacher, a former human, a bit of a gamer, lover of history, and more, but she wouldn’t put herself beyond being a spiteful bitch. Those Aunties kidnapped her, threatened her with soap, and then forced her into fox form against her will.

Now? Now, she had some colorful and powerful language to teach to some kits.

“Listen closely and repeat after me. ‘Fuck. Off. F-U-C-K O-F-F.’” Raine began her lesson and hopefully this would teach those fucking Aunties a lesson…

~~~~

AN:

HiddenMaster: I apologize for any body horror mentioned in this chapter, but it seemed funny at the time.

Also kits learning such fun language in a world where language is magic. This can’t go wrong.

BookDragon: After all, when English is the language of magic.. What does cussing at someone do? “I CAST SHIT YOUR PANTS!” is just one possibility. The floofs have no one to blame for themselves for not believing Raine 😛. FUCK OFF is... well, the effects will be familiar to anyone who has played RPGs in the past decade and a half or so.

Kitsu: “Fus Ro Fuck-You!” As Hidden explained to me a couple times is going to be incredibly funny, I can see it now.

Also, yes, I’m still glad I forced Hidden and Dragon to actually listen to what I had to say about the magic system, because they tried to overcomplicate it all to hell, and wouldn’t listen until I literally spent an hour arguing with them about it at first.

So yeah, I’m still going to poke them about that, and I don’t think I’ll ever let them live it down, no matter how well this story is received.

Because if I hadn’t done that, this would be a very different story, and much more edgy and overcomplicated. Not something I would have been willing to pay for.

HiddenMaster: Aww… Come on Kitsu, I get it, it is better this way.

BookDragon: I do not remember wanting to overcomplicate it, I remember trying to get both your takes on it and seeing what would work best for it. There’s no pout emoji in OneDrive, so imagine one here. Regardless, it has turned out for the best and the Latin angle Hidden wanted to go for would have been... ultimately less silly and more easily critiqued by readers in ways we wouldn’t want to invite.  And now... uh, I think it’s time for our supports unless anyone has something to say?

HiddenMaster: If you would like to support us so we can keep providing wonderful words, or you would like a commission of your own, check out our support carrds below for our Patreons.

HiddenMaster’s Archive: https://hiddenmasterarchive.carrd.co/

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