Lady Kitsune’s Fox Garden

02: Shit Spear Mountain

The first thing Niwashi noticed was the smell. It absolutely reeked of something she couldn’t quite identify. Something that smelled god-awful, to the point she was glad that one of her passive abilties caused plantlife to grow around her.

Every step she took caused a small patch of flowers to grow, combatting the foul stench as she moved through the mountainous shrine, the acidic rain doing no damage to her but certainly feeling like sticky brown sludge across her face every time she thought about it. Such a disgusting realm, and she was tasked with cleaning it up.

A ghastly spirit slammed itself into her tails, only to be splattered when it exploded, with no damage at all. The sounds of children laughing echoed in her ears, but she brushed it off. And then, when she made to cast the spell [Grand Nativity of a Forest of Trees] to help clear the miasma, a ghostly brown bull appeared before her, her ears twitching as another living being showed themselves right beside her.

Where they using [Perfect Unknowable]? Were they an Assassin? Perhaps it would be best if she asked, rather than assuming.

“Hey uh,” she looked at the tall, silver-haired Tengu with a side-eye, mostly ignoring the trash mobs trying to get past her automatic defenses. “You come here often?”

The silver-haired Tengu raised an eyebrow. “Weirdly enough, I did crash into here a while back. Really should’ve dealt with, well, all of this,” she said, gesturing at the gathered trash level spirits trying and failing to get at them. “But I was, uh, dealing with a hangover and really was not in a mood to. My bad,” she laughed, lightly.

Then she straightened. “Wait, names, bad about that. Hi there! I’m Tenshi Kuro! Pleasure to meetcha! Want me, to, like, blow away these spirits for a bit? They’re not doing anything to your tails but they really stink,” she said, flapping a wing for emphasis.

“I can handle it,” the Kitsune sighed, tapping her foot to cast [Roses of Purity] on the ground and give them some breathing space.

What she didn’t expect, was for the roses to explode into rapid and violent growth, absorbing all the miasma in an area around them and strangling the ghostly brown cow spirit. However, it was nice that this happened, because they somehow also cleared up the clouds and allowed the rainfall to return to it’s natural state.

The Tengu stared, wide eyed at the explosive growth. “Wow,” she breathed with a pop of her lips. “You, uh, related to to Inari, by chance? Certainly prettier than how I would have handled this.” she said, before muttering, “Less on fire too…”

“If I wanted it to be on fire, I would have grown Eucalyptus trees,” Niwashi muttered to herself. “Call me Niwashi,” she said, holding out her hand for a shake.

Kuro blinked. “Wow, even I haven’t seen Yasaka do that. By the way, you know her? Eh, stupid question. Although I probably should go report on this whole situation… you gonna be here later?” she said, gently holding Niwashi’s hand briefly before letting it go like you would a foxxo.

“I think I’ll take this place,” Niwashi smiled. “It has plenty of fertilizer, and I know my mother, Inari, would be proud if I turned it into a proper garden.”

“Huh, third demigod I’ve met. Neat. Well, curious to see you make something of this place! Was always an eyesore even before it became evil spirit capital. I’ll see you later, cutie, off to tell Yasaka she has a relative on the Kusoyari Mountain!” Kuro said, taking off with a frankly alarming speed that set the wind rushing over the entire area and ruffled her hair and clothes.

“Welp, I should probably get started on making my Den then,” Niwashi grinned, finally beginning to cast the spell she wanted to cast this entire time. But first, she planted the Seed of Yggdrassil at her feet, and stepped back.

“[Grand Nativity of a Forest of Trees]!” she cast, happily growing herself a little forest of trees from a single tree.

And while these were still saplings, they were far bigger than most any other tree could hope to be. After all, they were the children of Yggdrasil.

~~~~

Odin, the Allfather, sighed happily. Why did he sigh happily?

Oh, it was very simple. Today, the valkyries were doing aquatic training, and who didn’t love scantily clad beauties getting wet!

Bouncing, beautiful, athletic women, fighting in skintight suits, in tight fiting armor, even some relaxing after intense sessions in bikinis…

It was lovely, and Odin’s favorite time of the month.

Granted, at least two had thrown things at him already, but it was all part of the fun and—

Odin stiffened. All thoughts of perversion faded as he swiveled, looking across the world.

What he just felt could only be described as the birth of another Yggdrasil pinged on his divine senses.

Grunting, he knelt, scribing several runes on the ground. The dirt swished before it became a hazy mirror to another world.

“Bah, hidden realm,” he said, noticing how hazy the connection was, but he knew one thing for sure.

Rising from the mist he could see wasn’t just one tree. It was many, and a 9 tailed kitsune stood there watching.

Things had just gotten interesting.

~~~~

Yasaka stretched her back, yawning as she allowed herself a moment to relax while she waited for the last report of the day.

It was a rare moment when the paperwork was actually finished, and she was feeling quite good about herself for having learned the [Shadow Clone] technique from that strange traveler who talked about some such manga or whatever. The technique was incredibly useful, and all it cost her was to allow him to sleep with her for a single night.

Ah, the folly of youth. He could have asked for glory, for riches beyond measure. People would have been waiting at his feet, begging to learn this technique. But all he wanted was as he put it, “Some Foxussy.”

Well, she didn’t mind. He was quite youthful and energetic, so it was quite fun. Not to mention he was a Senjutsu practitioner, so his seed was actually quite tasty.

Hmm, but her minion was late. The Yatagarasu known as Tenshi Kuro would normally be there, trying to clock out early, so that she could extort a back-rub out of the silly bird. Perhaps she would have to find someone else to rub her back this evening?

There was a knock at the door.

“Ah,” Yasaka sniffed. Right as shewas about to call for another Tengu as well. Good sense of timing, this one. “Come in, Miss Tenshi. I have the oils ready.”

“Hey foxxy mommy, did you know you have a relative sitting over on Kusoyari Mountain? Went there to blow it up and they were already taking care of it, full nature goddess mode enabled. Said they’re Inari’s daughter, so tracks. Thought you should know. Also can I go home early tonight?” Kuro said, rapid fire.

Ah. Shit.

“Apparently not,” Yasaka sighed, picking up the old Rotary phone to dial Inari. “Please stay for a while, I have a feeling I’m going to need to keep Inari occupied tonight, and you have the biggest dick.”

Kuro sighed, long and hard. “I’ll go get the energy drinks,” she said, drudging out of the room with notably less enthusiasm.

~~~~

AN:

HiddenMaster: This chapter did not go as expected. The whole outline got condensed down to like, 600 words, and then we just kept going and then we interpreted Kuro’s Yatagarasu species being three legged as her having a dick, and well a lot fucking happened and I feel like my brain got smacked by a drive by foxxo in a sports car.

Kitsu: No, you got smacked by a drive-by foxxo on an e-bike. Speaking of which, seriously need one I can actually pedal omg. The one I have is great and all, but it won’t go up the hills, and I live on the side of a mountain, so it’s kinda useless.

Also, the one I want on my throne is crazy, and can go 200 kilometers on battery power alone, yet also has pedals, which would be really fucking cool to ride it to Lund and back when I’m a bit more in shape. Would super love to go on long biking trips like that, and get the worlds best cinnamon buns (In my opinion) as a treat.

That one is here if you wanna look: https://throne.com/kitsuneobsessedfreak/item/71697820-de98-47a9-bf35-07521a500b61

Hurricain: things went crazy during the end. Mommy Inari gonna need distracting and Kuro's 'third leg' will get a workout. Me thinks. Thanks for putting up with me hidden and kitsu. Hopefully we can get more out soon.

HiddenMaster: Indeed, and it’s all good Hurricain. If you, my glorious reader, would like to see more words on our end or would like to commission a fic of your own, please check out the support carrds below.

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