Chapter 18: Interlude - Even If Its Flapping Wings Do Not Reach the Moon

[Sub-Episode]

This term is primarily used in video games, and is also sometimes called a sub-scenario, interlude, or side story.

These are created with the purpose of enriching and making the main story more interesting, such as providing items to aid in gameplay, supplementing the main storyline, or depicting character development and interactions between characters. Typical examples include what are commonly known as side quests or character events.

In games aimed at romance, mainly those called "Galge," it's common to see how the heroine and protagonist are viewed by those around them. This prevents the story from being confined to the narrow world of the protagonist and heroine's relationship, adding elements that wouldn't be visible from their perspective. While not absolutely necessary for the story to progress, they are literally like great supporting characters that color the narrative.

I like scenarios where the spotlight is shone on characters who aren't exactly main characters, revealing their intense feelings towards the protagonist and heroine.

I also like scenarios that simply depict the heroine's everyday life. There can be endless supplementary scenarios.....

'Ahh, I want infinite room for imagination.'

★★★

The Hojo family.

This is the family of my birth, Hojo Sakura, and its origins can be traced back several generations to Suzaku.

Seiryū, Suzaku, Byakko, and Genbu are the names of sacred beasts that are said to protect the four directions in this country, and at the same time, they were also titles bestowed upon Onmyōji who were considered the most skilled in the field that each sacred beast presides over.

For Seiryū, it is agriculture, water control, and related prayers such as rainmaking.

For Byakko, it is combat, attracting disaster, and the creation and use of shikigami to assist in these matters.

For Genbu, it is protection against evil, bringing good fortune, and the construction of protective barriers.

As for Suzaku, as its name suggests, it is a symbol of regeneration and good fortune, and the title was bestowed upon Onmyōji who were considered the most skilled in the field of healing, or medicine.

The Hojo family, which began with such an ancestor, naturally has many members involved in medicine, and my father and brother both worked at the Pharmacy Bureau.

The family itself doesn't have a particularly long history, and there haven't been any famous Onmyōji since its founding.

However, despite this, many members have served in government ministries, primarily the Pharmacy Bureau, working for the good of this country—a family to be proud of.

That's what the Hojo family means to me.

That's why, when my father ordered me to serve the youngest child of the Onjōji family and I had to leave home, I didn't feel sad. Rather, I was even happy that I had been given a role befitting a member of the Hojo family: to work for someone suffering.

In the beginning, when I first met Chitose-sama, all I thought about was fulfilling my role admirably as a member of the Hojo family.

Not as Sakura, but as a member of the Hojo family—that was all I thought about.

★

"Sakura, the moon is beautiful tonight. It's truly the Mid-Autumn Festival, perfectly round."

"Yes, it is. But it's already getting cold at night. Don't let yourself get too cold."

"...Sakura, you're still so stiff."

"That's my job, after all."

It's been a while since I started working as a personal attendant to a girl named Onjōji Chitose, but to be honest, she's quite different from what I imagined before meeting her in person.

A girl that captivated death itself, favored by the moon, a tragic girl burdened with a chronic illness tormented by the Yin energy of the Onjōji family—a girl with many titles upon her name due to her afflicted by the Yin energy, coupled with her family's reputation.

That was the information I had about Onjōji Chitose before meeting her in person, and the image I had of her was one of someone consumed by grief, spending her days in suffering and sorrow.

This was because many of the seriously ill people I'd dealt with at home were like that.

At the very least, I had never seen or imagined someone with a body that could die at any moment, yet who would look at the moon and nonchalantly say, "I suddenly feel like eating dumplings and mooncakes," with a smile.

Chitose-sama is a person who laughs often.

Even though breathing must be difficult for her, she laughs every morning saying the morning air tastes good.

Even though eating and swallowing must be painful for her, she laughs at every meal saying the food tastes good.

Even though standing and walking must not be easy for her, she laughs every time saying that moving her body is fun.

Even though simply living must not be easy for her, she always laughs, saying how much fun it is.

..... And she laughs every time we talk, saying that she enjoys talking to me.

She does so with a radiant smile on her face.

"..... Chitose-sama, may I ask you something?"

"Oh, I'm so happy Sakura is talking to me! Ask me anything."

"Is it really something to be so happy about...?"

"Of course. Because Sakura, if I don't talk to you, you just stay silently by my side. That's fine, though, because I can just talk to you."

"..... I'm sorry."

"There's nothing to apologize for. It's not like it was a bad thing. Otou-sama always said that not talking unnecessarily while working is a virtue."

As she said this, Chitose-sama burst into laughter again.

"So, what do you want to ask, Sakura? Ask me anything, I'll answer anything!"

"I understand that it's a rude question. If I've offended you, you can scold me."

"I won't do that! I mean, what are you planning to ask?! Now it's kind of scary..."

I think she's someone who can really change her expressions. Even at this very moment, her emotions are shifting one after another, just like any other child you might see anywhere.

"Then let me ask you this: why can you smile like that, Chitose-sama?"

"..... Is it so strange that I smile?"

"To be honest, at least to me, it seems strange."

"I see... Why do you think so, Sakura?"

"Chitose-sama, you were born bearing the great suffering of being a Lunar. Yet, I don't see any trace of that shadow on you. How can you behave like that? It must be painful just to live, so why...?"

I know I'm asking something rude. Even in an equal relationship, asking "Why are you so happy despite your unfortunate circumstances?" isn't something one should ask, let alone to their master.

Nevertheless, I couldn't help but ask. Why, why can you be like that?

"...Yes. Certainly, from the outside, my life might look that way. I don't deny the pain and sadness, but even so, Sakura, I don't think of myself as unhappy."

"Why? ...Why do you think that way?"

"Because it's the obvious thing to do."

"Obvious?"

"Of course. It's true that this body doesn't always do what I want it to. My hair doesn't grow nicely as I want it to, and neither does my height. Sometimes I get out of breath just by walking, and sometimes even swallowing rice gruel or plain water is difficult. But I'm more than just that."

"....."

"Because I was born as me, I was able to meet Otou-sama and Okaa-sama. The same goes for Onii-sama, Ayame-sensei, and you, Sakura.

..... I won't deny the hardships and suffering, but there are just as many joyful and happy things.

Fortune and misfortune are intertwined like a rope, good and bad are like Yin and Yang. It's natural to have both good and bad things, right? 

So I don't think of myself as unluckier than others. Rather, I even consider myself lucky. Because I'm very happy right now."

There was no trace of sadness in her expression; it was clear that she truly felt that way from the bottom of her heart.

'...How foolish I was...'

I had been pitying her all this time. I had assumed that this girl, burdened with the hardship of being the Lunar from birth, was a pitiable being, and I felt sorry for her, and even arrogantly thought I could help her.

'What was so pitiable about this girl?

Where was there any reason to feel pity for a girl who smiled, bathed in the soft light of the moon behind her?

Who did I think I was, to pity someone who was simply... alive?'

"Are you satisfied with this answer? This is all I can say, but if you want more..."

"Yes, I'm satisfied. Completely satisfied, without a single cloud in sight."

"Really? That's good then!"

This must be why I've never seen or heard my brother or father use the words "poor thing" when speaking to a patient.

"Poor thing" is a kind word, a gentle word that sounds good to both the speaker and the listener.

But my father and brother knew long ago that it's a word that tramples on someone struggling in pain, a word that belittles their resolve.

They both knew this, and I was the only one who didn't realize it was a word that insulted this girl's smile.

I sighed to myself, wondering how I could have ever spoken of being a member of the Hojo family.

But to give up and run away would be a disgrace to the Hojo name.

More than anything, regardless of the Hojo family, I wanted to be by this person's side simply as Sakura.

By the side of this weak yet strong Chitose-sama.

I knelt down, bowed my head, and showed my outmost respect as a servant.

"Sakura, what's wrong?! I'm not angry at all!"

Feeling a little guilty for causing her to panic, I nevertheless maintained my composure and spoke from the bottom of my heart.

"I, Hojo Sakura, will always be by Chitose-sama's side. Please continue to look after me."

"Um... I don't really understand, but yes! I hope we can continue to be friends for a long time to come, Sakura!"

"Of course. No matter what happens, Sakura will always be Chitose-sama's attendant."

"I'm happy to hear that, but what exactly is Sakura thinking?!"

★

"Chiharu!"

That night, when Chitose-sama taught me something so important. Since then, Chitose-sama hasn't changed at all; in fact, I think she enjoys her daily life even more because of Chiharu's presence.

..... Considering the life Chiharu has lived, thinking this might be more than just disrespectful, but honestly, I'm a little envious of him.

If Chitose-sama is the moon, then he is the sun. He illuminates her, eases her suffering, and his very existence saves Chitose-sama, the moon.

.....It's something I can never achieve. That's why I'm a little envious of Chiharu.

I'm ashamed of myself for thinking this way;

I'm ashamed of my own immaturity. But even so....

"Look! Sakura too!"　

"Don't get too excited, Chitose-sama."　

"It's okay. Because I have you, Sakura!"　

I will continue to stay by Chitose-sama's side, with the promise I made that night in my heart.

If I cannot become the sun that shines upon you...

Then....

At least....

At very least...

I want to be a bird.

A bird that sweeps away the weeds that infest you.

I want to be a bird.

A bird that pecks at the harmful insects that gather around you.

I want to be a bird.

A bird that continues to fly towards you, the moon.

I want to be a bird.

A bird that continues to gaze upon the radiance of you, My Dearest Moon.