Chapter 106: 1-3
As the summer holidays drew to a close, the notices for the new term and the booklists finally arrived. And then—
"This, this—it isn't a dream, right? Hey, Maria, try pinching my cheek—Ow, ow! It's not a dream! That's enough, Mari—Ow, ow!"
In the hands of Ron, who was weeping tears of joy, was a Prefect badge. This time, too, Ron and Hermione had been chosen as Prefects. Mrs. Weasley was naturally beside herself with joy, and dinner that evening turned into a celebration party for the two of them.
"Harry."
I snuggled up close to Harry, who had slipped away from the party.
"Are you jealous of Ron?"
"Why would I be?"
Harry's voice was vague as he lay sprawled on the bed.
"You thought you were going to be made a Prefect, didn't you?"
"Did you think so, Maria?"
"No way. Our resident Gryffindor honors student could be no one but Hermione."
"But Ron isn't an honors student."
"...That's true."
I gently stroked his hair. Harry didn't throw a tantrum. He simply closed his eyes as if swallowing his emotions.
"Ron had something I don't. Dumbledore saw that. Right? If—if you had been made a Prefect, Maria."
"Impossible."
"Even so. If Hermione weren't here, it definitely would have been you. And if that had happened, and your fellow Prefect was Ron... I don't know."
Pat, pat—I tapped Harry's back.
Right now, he feels unreasonable for feeling so unreasonable. I understand it all. You do, and I do.
"I wonder what Dumbledore is thinking."
"Who knows."
"Maria, have you noticed? —Dumbledore is avoiding us. Everyone is hiding something."
"...Yeah."
I prayed that Harry would just fall asleep without opening his eyes.
I noticed—so you've noticed it too, haven't you, Harry. I wish it had taken just a little bit longer.
The distrust that had begun to sprout was steadily eating away at Harry's heart.
"Harry, Dumbledore is—"
"Maria, may I come in?"
There was a knock, followed by Professor Lupin's voice. I stood up. Harry didn't stop me.
"I'm going to step out for a bit. ...Goodnight, Harry."
"Maria."
Harry said.
"—You're always hiding things from me too, Maria."
Harboring a sense of loss, the boy stroked the bed that had lost its warmth.
Summoned by Professor Lupin, I was now in Sirius's room. The two of them wore grave expressions.
"Maria, about the Dementor matter—you were right."
"—!"
I sharply caught my breath. So the Dementors really had appeared. Right in the middle of a Muggle town—acting on orders.
"There's no way a Dementor would be in a place like that by coincidence. —This was an attack aimed at Harry, wasn't it?"
I nodded. Those two would surely understand whose doing it was. The Ministry of Magic had assumed Harry would return to Privet Drive again this year.
"We have too many enemies..."
With a click of his tongue, Sirius ran a hand through his long hair. Even though it was entirely inappropriate for the situation, I thought he looked rather dashing. Professor Lupin was massaging the bridge of his nose, looking utterly exhausted.
"Listen to me. It goes without saying that we must keep Harry vigilant, but Maria, you need to be careful too. Don't do anything reckless at Hogwarts. Refrain from standing out. Especially you—you're clever, just like James."
I was taken aback by Sirius's overly serious gaze and his words.
Sirius was telling me... not to be reckless?
"So you're not going to tell me... to gather information at Hogwarts."
"Of course not. You're students. You're not in the Order. That sort of thing is Snivellus's... no, Snape's job. Adults are the ones who shoulder the danger. You two are meant to be protected."
Sirius continued. Professor Lupin also had a look on his face that said this was obvious. The two of them were genuinely—deeply worried about us.
"But... wouldn't Dad have enjoyed this kind of thrill?"
"Maria... listen, the two of you certainly look a lot like James. You've inherited his talent, too. But... you are not James. Please don't inherit his recklessness as well. Let us protect you."
Sirius shook his head in sheer exasperation. Wearing the face of a father, he called Harry, 'Harry'.
I am not James—I was the one who knew that better than anyone. That was the very thing I had wanted to tell him.
"You really are seeing Harry, aren't you, Sirius? Not Dad, but Harry."
The ghost of James was not reflected in his grey eyes.
"Of course I am."
I smiled clumsily at Sirius, who had answered immediately without a moment's hesitation. If I hadn't, I felt like I was going to throw up. Maybe the feast from the party. Maybe my breath. Maybe my voice. I just didn't want to make a fool of myself, so I smiled.
I was sure that this Sirius would never look at Harry and call him James. He wouldn't expect Harry to seek the same adventures James did. He wasn't trying to bring his best friend back. Inside him... James had become the 'past'. Harry was living as Harry.
Ah—Ah... I'm so jealous.
September 1st. We headed to King's Cross Station under the escort of the Order. There was no need for Sirius to sneak around as a dog; he saw us off openly and proudly. Ron and Hermione headed for the Prefects' compartment, while Harry and I searched for empty seats with Ginny.
"Maria, what about Malfoy?"
"He's a Prefect anyway, so he'll be busy. ...Ah, I guess I'm just a third wheel to you, Ginny?"
"That's not true at all! Honestly, you're so mean."
While adoring Ginny, who pouted cutely when teased, we found a compartment where Neville and Luna were sitting.
"This is Luna Lovegood. A Ravenclaw in my year. Hi, Luna! This is—"
"I know. You're Harry Potter. And you're Maria Potter. Ginny talks about you all the time."
Luna blinked her permanently surprised, protuberant eyes. Then, she stared fixedly at Harry. Harry looked extremely uncomfortable.
"That magazine, it's pretty good."
I offered some casual flattery to save Harry from Luna's gaze. The Quibbler, edited by Luna's father, was her pride and joy. It was a bogus magazine that everyone made fun of, but later on, it would bizarrely end up saving Harry's life.
After about an hour, Ron and Hermione arrived, and the compartment grew lively. I had completely forgotten. —No, I had been trying to forget. The existence of him.
"Maria."
Silence—The laughter vanished as if cold water had been poured over it. Everyone's gaze gathered on me.
"Apologies for putting a damper on your pleasant chat. —May I borrow her?"
It was Draco Malfoy. A Prefect badge gleamed proudly on his chest.
"Maria."
Harry took my hand. Hermione was anxiously looking back and forth between me and Draco. ...Just as I thought, the two of them had noticed. That I was avoiding him.
"It's okay."
"Maria..."
"I won't take long."
I broke away from Harry and Hermione's eyes and stood up from my seat. Draco had already started walking. He guided me to an empty compartment he had apparently reserved.
"—I'm not expecting an answer."
"..."
I just stood there, unable to even sit down.
"...Were you serious?"
"Did you think I wasn't?"
"But, you... it's strange, isn't it? For you to... like me. I'm... you must know. —That I'm actually a boy."
"Your gender doesn't matter."
Yielding to his pull, I sat down opposite him. Draco's eyes were quiet. They were the color of a lake bed seen through the surface of the water.
"I like you because you are you. —Harry Potter."
I had no idea how to interpret that, or how I should accept it.
Draco Malfoy likes Harry Potter? —It was as if the whole world had gone mad.
"...What about Astoria?"
"Of course, I love her."
"You love Astoria, but you also like Harry Potter?"
"Yes."
"That's messed up…… It's like you've lost your mind."
"Love is something that drives people mad, isn't it?"
His usual cynical smile. —I suddenly realized something. His jawline was sharp, his nose straight and prominent, his eyelashes cool and long, his eyes quiet—veins and bones stood out on his hands, and his arms and legs were lithe. His voice... had deepened.
The boy in front of me was becoming a man. ...Leaving me behind.
"Maria. No, perhaps I should call you Harry now. Harry, I don't need an answer. —Not yet. I know you don't look at me that way."
"........."
"The reason I brought you out of there was for something else."
Uncrossing his legs, Draco harbored a strange light in his eyes. I was completely swallowed up. By his alluring magic.
Draco told me. Keeping me trapped in his gaze. With a face that was—chillingly—just as it always was.
"I want you... to kill my father with me."
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